User Tag List

First 34567 Last

Results 41 to 50 of 61

Thread: Learned Fe

  1. #41
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    MBTI
    WXYZ
    Posts
    14

    Default

    Life told me that if you don't learn Fe, you're f*cked.

    I don't agree with this, people use leqanred Fe when they are insecure around crowds and don't want to be a target for attack.

    People who can use Fe natuirally are type 3s and females in general.

    Learned Fe is quite simple:
    never speak your mind
    don't use your mouth as a weapon to attack other people
    add comments to what everyone has agreed on
    don't rock the boat
    put excessive simile faces on your posts to tone down the offense

    Its better to have courage and stand yp for the truht in long term than to blend in. But this is often more difficult for some people than others.
    Sorry for typo, I have poor english and I don't like to edit my posts

  2. #42
    @.~*virinaĉo*~.@ Totenkindly's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    MBTI
    FREE
    Enneagram
    594 sx/sp
    Socionics
    LII Ne
    Posts
    42,333

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by energy View Post
    Learned Fe is quite simple:
    never speak your mind
    don't use your mouth as a weapon to attack other people
    add comments to what everyone has agreed on
    don't rock the boat
    put excessive simile faces on your posts to tone down the offense
    I think that's a pretty shallow view of Fe.
    "Hey Capa -- We're only stardust." ~ "Sunshine"

    “Pleasure to me is wonder—the unexplored, the unexpected, the thing that is hidden and the changeless thing that lurks behind superficial mutability. To trace the remote in the immediate; the eternal in the ephemeral; the past in the present; the infinite in the finite; these are to me the springs of delight and beauty.” ~ H.P. Lovecraft

  3. #43
    meh Salomé's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    MBTI
    INTP
    Enneagram
    5w4 sx/sp
    Posts
    10,540

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by whatever View Post
    From observation of people on this forum, I have seen several members who seem to have almost taught themselves to use Fe to a much greater degree than they probably naturally would use it. I'll admit to having taught myself to be a lot nicer and more diplomatic than I was when younger, because it gets me my way and wins arguments more frequently.

    I was just wondering about others' inputs-

    why would you develop a trait that you would not naturally use as much?

    what are the benefits of this?

    does it ever feel like it was a learned, as opposed to natural, trait?
    It seems to me that some people are confusing the Fe function with behaviours manifested by mature Fe-types. For types where Fe is the inferior function (e.g. INTP), Fe is usually not under conscious control and if/when it emerges (e.g. in situations of extreme stress) it is usually unhealthy and disadvantageous.

    The inferior function isn't something which can be developed easily (Lenore Thomson suggests that one shouldn't even try to develop it directly).

    What can be learned are the rules and behaviours that govern socially acceptable interaction - but that isn't the same as developing the Fe function per se. The fact that the OP and some others feel the need to rationalize their 'development of Fe' based on benefits accrued to themselves, shows that they haven't really developed it at all, I would have thought?

    In "I'm not crazy, I'm just not you" by Pearlman & Albritton, they suggest the following for the development of Extraverted Feeling:

    "Make an effort to write poetry or some other written expression of the overflow of feelings. Even listing words that express aspects of one's feelings will give life and momentarily capture the experience. By asking a close friend or significant other to see the poetry or word list, ask which expressions capture positive qualities of your relationship. This will ensure that both the basic needs for analysis and affirmation are met. Labeling the feelings is a basic start; specific experiences need to be associated with each label."

    *cringes*

  4. #44
    @.~*virinaĉo*~.@ Totenkindly's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    MBTI
    FREE
    Enneagram
    594 sx/sp
    Socionics
    LII Ne
    Posts
    42,333

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by bluemonday View Post
    In "I'm not crazy, I'm just not you" by Pearlman & Albritton, they suggest the following for the development of Extraverted Feeling:

    "Make an effort to write poetry or some other written expression of the overflow of feelings. Even listing words that express aspects of one's feelings will give life and momentarily capture the experience. By asking a close friend or significant other to see the poetry or word list, ask which expressions capture positive qualities of your relationship. This will ensure that both the basic needs for analysis and affirmation are met. Labeling the feelings is a basic start; specific experiences need to be associated with each label."

    *cringes*
    *hides in back of closet*
    "Hey Capa -- We're only stardust." ~ "Sunshine"

    “Pleasure to me is wonder—the unexplored, the unexpected, the thing that is hidden and the changeless thing that lurks behind superficial mutability. To trace the remote in the immediate; the eternal in the ephemeral; the past in the present; the infinite in the finite; these are to me the springs of delight and beauty.” ~ H.P. Lovecraft

  5. #45
    Striving for balance Little Linguist's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    MBTI
    xNFP
    Posts
    6,885

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by energy View Post
    I don't agree with this, people use leqanred Fe when they are insecure around crowds and don't want to be a target for attack.

    People who can use Fe natuirally are type 3s and females in general.

    Learned Fe is quite simple:
    never speak your mind
    don't use your mouth as a weapon to attack other people
    add comments to what everyone has agreed on
    don't rock the boat
    put excessive simile faces on your posts to tone down the offense

    Its better to have courage and stand yp for the truht in long term than to blend in. But this is often more difficult for some people than others.
    Well, damn that sounds just like me. :rolli:

    Oh, wait, I almost forgot: --->
    If you are interested in language, words, linguistics, or foreign languages, check out my blog and read, post, and/or share.

  6. #46
    ish red no longer *sad* nightning's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    MBTI
    INfj
    Posts
    3,741

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by energy View Post
    I don't agree with this, people use leqanred Fe when they are insecure around crowds and don't want to be a target for attack.

    People who can use Fe natuirally are type 3s and females in general.

    Learned Fe is quite simple:
    never speak your mind
    don't use your mouth as a weapon to attack other people
    add comments to what everyone has agreed on
    don't rock the boat
    put excessive simile faces on your posts to tone down the offense

    Its better to have courage and stand yp for the truht in long term than to blend in. But this is often more difficult for some people than others.
    Is that right? It's certainly not my definition for learned Fe... Yes, Fe in the traditional sense does censor some thoughts. But I see it more for efficiency. Picking your battle. Arguing about everything means nobody will spend the time to listen to you when you do have something really important to say. Essentially add "unless necessary" on the first 4 points on your list will be about right. As to the fifth. Does that change anything? Not really.

    Quote Originally Posted by bluemonday View Post
    It seems to me that some people are confusing the Fe function with behaviours manifested by mature Fe-types. For types where Fe is the inferior function (e.g. INTP), Fe is usually not under conscious control and if/when it emerges (e.g. in situations of extreme stress) it is usually unhealthy and disadvantageous.
    Agreed. Which is more the reason you should learn more about it and practice controlling it consciously so it flares up less often and less dramatically.

    The inferior function isn't something which can be developed easily (Lenore Thomson suggests that one shouldn't even try to develop it directly).
    Perhaps I ought to be an ENTP... just because it's difficult and people suggest you shouldn't even try is no reason not to. There's a great deal you can benefit from learning.

    What can be learned are the rules and behaviours that govern socially acceptable interaction - but that isn't the same as developing the Fe function per se. The fact that the OP and some others feel the need to rationalize their 'development of Fe' based on benefits accrued to themselves, shows that they haven't really developed it at all, I would have thought?
    Yes for the first, not sure for your second point. I see the use of every function as a tool. I believe everybody has and uses all 8. It's just a matter relative frequency of use. It's like muscle memory... you're naturally equipped to handle your dominant and auxiliary functions like reflexes. The rest of them aren't automatic. You have to practice often to use them, and only under conscious control. However practice enough, you do develop muscle memory. And that's the end goal. Having a large enough variety of tools so that you can pick the best one under any situation.

    In "I'm not crazy, I'm just not you" by Pearlman & Albritton, they suggest the following for the development of Extraverted Feeling:

    "Make an effort to write poetry or some other written expression of the overflow of feelings. Even listing words that express aspects of one's feelings will give life and momentarily capture the experience. By asking a close friend or significant other to see the poetry or word list, ask which expressions capture positive qualities of your relationship. This will ensure that both the basic needs for analysis and affirmation are met. Labeling the feelings is a basic start; specific experiences need to be associated with each label."

    *cringes*
    Are you sure that's Fe and not Fi? I'll cringe along with you if that's "practice". Fe to me is more social values rather than feelings. Practice for me is to stop and consider how my actions and what I say will affect other people before I proceed. Not any of these silly writing feelings down as poetry.

  7. #47
    Plumage and Moult proteanmix's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Enneagram
    1w2
    Posts
    5,514

    Default

    Now that I've thought about this more I'm wondering why people think Fe is something that's can be simply "learned" and that's really all there is to it. Can you learn Fi? This is incredibly impersonal the more think about it. All people are really learning or doing are the products of Fe and not much else.
    Relationships have normal ebbs and flows. They do not automatically get better and better when the participants learn more and more about each other. Instead, the participants have to work through the tensions of the relationship (the dialectic) while they learn and group themselves and a parties in a relationships. At times the relationships is very open and sharing. Other time, one or both parties to the relationship need their space, or have other concerns, and the relationship is less open. The theory posits that these cycles occur throughout the life of the relationship as the persons try to balance their needs for privacy and open relationship.
    Interpersonal Communication Theories and Concepts
    Social Penetration Theory 1
    Social Penetration Theory 2
    Social Penetration Theory 3

  8. #48
    meh Salomé's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    MBTI
    INTP
    Enneagram
    5w4 sx/sp
    Posts
    10,540

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by nightning View Post
    Agreed. Which is more the reason you should learn more about it and practice controlling it consciously so it flares up less often and less dramatically.
    How do you consciously control something that is unconscious? That's like saying you can script your dreams.
    Quote Originally Posted by nightning View Post
    Perhaps I ought to be an ENTP... just because it's difficult and people suggest you shouldn't even try is no reason not to. There's a great deal you can benefit from learning.
    Depends if the reasons are persuasive, naturally. Also helps if they align with your own prejudices.
    I have no interest in developing Fe. Fe is my nemesis. In the search for balance, what Thomson advises is that one concentrate on developing the auxiliary and tertiary functions, only then should you turn your attention to inferior ones.
    Quote Originally Posted by nightning View Post
    Yes for the first, not sure for your second point. I see the use of every function as a tool. I believe everybody has and uses all 8. It's just a matter relative frequency of use. It's like muscle memory... you're naturally equipped to handle your dominant and auxiliary functions like reflexes. The rest of them aren't automatic. You have to practice often to use them, and only under conscious control. However practice enough, you do develop muscle memory. And that's the end goal. Having a large enough variety of tools so that you can pick the best one under any situation.
    In that case, you sacrifice differentiation. No-one can develop all functions equally. I'd rather concentrate on what I'm good at than strive for some impossible perfection.
    Quote Originally Posted by nightning View Post
    Are you sure that's Fe and not Fi? I'll cringe along with you if that's "practice". Fe to me is more social values rather than feelings. Practice for me is to stop and consider how my actions and what I say will affect other people before I proceed. Not any of these silly writing feelings down as poetry.
    I thought so too at first, but I think it's the discussing feelings with an SO/friend that is the Fe bit.

    If you stop to consider cause and effect - is that not substituting Te for Fe?
    That's was I was trying to get at before.

    For Fi it talks about doing arty things, drawing symbols or the "colors of one's moods". i.e. right-hemisphere stuff.

    F*ck all that, I say.

  9. #49
    ish red no longer *sad* nightning's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    MBTI
    INfj
    Posts
    3,741

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by proteanmix View Post
    Now that I've thought about this more I'm wondering why people think Fe is something that's can be simply "learned" and that's really all there is to it. Can you learn Fi? This is incredibly impersonal the more think about it. All people are really learning or doing are the products of Fe and not much else.
    How do you define values without a standard we based our actions on? I believe that Fe is really about doing the right thing. It's just an extra set of parameters you need to consider before you make a decision. The act of considering is practicable. If I had it wrong, please feel free to correct me.

    Also I'm not saying a person with shadow Fe can ever be as good at its use as a Fe dominant individual. Obviously they can't. I'm saying it's still nonetheless beneficial for us to be more proficient at its uses. Some social skills is better than none at all.

    Fi is more difficult to learn. You need to figure out your values and to some point your personal feelings. A lot of sitting down in introspection.

  10. #50
    Permabanned
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    MBTI
    xkcd
    Enneagram
    9w1 sx/sp
    Socionics
    INT_
    Posts
    10,733

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by bluemonday View Post
    The inferior function isn't something which can be developed easily (Lenore Thomson suggests that one shouldn't even try to develop it directly).
    I think Lenore Thomson should be punched in the face.

Similar Threads

  1. [Fe] Fe=but I want it now!
    By LavaLucy in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 30
    Last Post: 03-01-2016, 03:28 PM
  2. [Fe] Fe oddness
    By sculpting in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 46
    Last Post: 04-05-2009, 11:47 PM
  3. [Fe] Does Fe do indifference?
    By Kalach in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 20
    Last Post: 03-08-2009, 10:09 PM
  4. [Fe] IxFP and the creative Fe
    By 527468 in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 13
    Last Post: 02-03-2009, 07:02 PM
  5. [Fe] Fe: No cute title...I just don't get it
    By sakuraba in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 106
    Last Post: 11-18-2008, 09:07 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
Single Sign On provided by vBSSO