MBTI Nightmares that are stuck in your mind

[Metis]

MBTI nightmare #1:

ANGEL: (appears out of nowhere) Metis, you're really an INFP. Stop trying and pretending to be anything else.

METIS: Okay, so I'm an INFP. I'm so glad that I finally know for sure what MBTI type I am. Thank you.

ANGEL: You're also an enneagram 9.

METIS: Cool. Any suggestions on how to use this information to the best outcome?

ANGEL: Your life's purpose is to be sweet and emotionally intelligent, so relax, and live and let live.

METIS: WTF? Hey... Exactly which kind of angel are you anyhow, angel?

ANGEL: Ahahaha! Yes, that is your curse. Be sweet and unassuming, Metis... sweet and... unassuming... (fades back into nowhere)

(Angel's voice echoes: "sweet.... unassuming...")



Now, is that realistic? Come on. INFPs don't really try to be sweet and unassuming. Who does that? Sometimes ESFJs do it (LOL).



MBTI nightmare #2: Metis meets the MBTI Inquisitor

INQUISITOR: So, Metis, you've decided that you're an ENTP now.

METIS: Yes.

INQ.: And our deputies, the school guidance counsellors, have told you in the past that "You're Very Bright, But You Don't Apply Yourself"--YVBBYDAY, or YVB-By-Day, for short. Is that true?

METIS: I've been informed of the YVBBYDAY thing.

INQ.: Many times.

(METIS waits)

INQ. (cont.): Now that you're an ENTP, we're going to assess you according to the following rubrics. (1) Argumentation. (2) Drivenness. (3) Enneagram Three-ishness...

(METIS slightly raises an eyebrow, forgetting not to show any internal response.)

INQ. (cont.): Do you have a problem with something I just said?

METIS: What's number four?

INQ: It looked like you had a reaction to something I said previously. Is there something you'd like to discuss?

METIS: What's number four?

(INQ. looks long and hard at Metis.)

(INQ. throws notepad down on table and glares at Metis.)

METIS: Oh, so there are just three metrics in your rubric, or whatever you called it?

INQ.: Metis, I'm afraid we just can't grant you the status of ENTP, due to your incompetence. (smiles some kind of "checkmate" smile, but Metis doesn't get why)

METIS: So do you want me to leave? ...?

INQ.: You're very smart, Metis, but you don't apply yourself. Shut the door on your way out.

(METIS exits, doesn't shut door, not to be passive-aggressive, but because it's not her job to shut the inquisitor's door or take orders from same. Says nothing.)

INQ.: (shouting down the hall after her from office) That's very inappropriate! You'll never amount to any kind of MBTI type with that attitude!!







Your MBTI nightmare?

 

[Merced]

Very occasionally I fear that I'm actually a severely mistyped e9 INxJ and my disdain for the typing is actually a manifestation of hyper self loathing. Expect a password scramble if it ever comes to fruition.

 

[Lord Lavender]

I sometimes have nightmares I am actually a So/Sp as they are said to be disconnected from people and truly cold at their core and thats something id be ashamed off having no care or connection with other people. I only hope I am Sx second.

 

[hjgbujhghg]

I sometimes think that I'm just very unhealthy ENFP 7w6 so/sx

 

[LucieCat]

I sometimes have nightmares I am actually a So/Sp as they are said to be disconnected from people and truly cold at their core and thats something id be ashamed off having no care or connection with other people. I only hope I am Sx second.

I don't think people with Sx last are cold at their core. I'm Sx last (though I'm pretty sure I am sp/so, it could be the other way around) and I'm very warm and friendly. I can be disconnected from others at times, but that's mostly because I know most people don't meet me at my level and I don't expect them too. I also enjoy dealing with ideas before people, and I have hermit-esque tendencies.

I also connect far better in group situations. Until I'm comfortable, initiating one on one contact often feels very awkward and uncomfortable. I love people who ask me to do things with them for that reason.

I also tend to be a bit of a drifter socially. I have few close friends I've found in lots of places and lots of acquantinces I've found in an even wider range of places.

 

[Hive]

I sometimes have nightmares I am actually a So/Sp as they are said to be disconnected from people and truly cold at their core and thats something id be ashamed off having no care or connection with other people. I only hope I am Sx second.

The social instinct is actually the instinct most characterized by connective energy and desire to create and maintain relationships. Sx is mainly about attraction and repulsion, displaying your plumage and aggressive competition. The common description of sx desiring depth and connection is just what happens when the sx energy is directed towards a specific person, but in and of itself, sx is about broadcasting rather than communicating. In a vacuum, the sx instinct is actually quite cold and selfish in its focus and desires, so being sx blind doesn't at all mean you're gonna suffer a massive disconnect from people.

The proof of your desire and ability to connect is gonna be found in your actual relationships, not in a typological abstraction of your personality. This is the point where typology becomes more hurtful than helpful, as the personal limits here are only real if you imagine them to be real, and you imagine they're real because that's what you've read, and not what you've actually experienced in your life.

 

[Peter Deadpan]

I have this fear that I may be an INTP. I almost always test as INXP, with little to no preference for T/F. Inferior Fe just sounds so... no thank you. But I mean... I don't really scream Fi dom, now do I? I don't openly value Fe over Fi, so INFJ seems unlikely, and INTJ is out. A few people can see Ne dom for me, but I'd be an unusual example as a 4w5. Or maybe I am untypable. It's a clusterfuck. And I actually do have dreams about it, or at least sometimes it's my first thought in the morning. Probably a good sign that it's time for another break.

 

[Yama]

My typology nightmare is that people think I actually act like an ESFJ profile.

 

[Smilephantomhive]

Mine is people irl take it so seriously that it's like Divergent but with types instead of factions.

 

[Peter Deadpan]

Mine is people irl take it so seriously that it's like Divergent but with types instead of factions.

Your fear is reality though.

 

[Smilephantomhive]

Your fear is reality though.

It's not that far yet, is it????????

 

[Galena]

I don't have typology nightmares. I am the typology nightmare.

 

[Qlip]

I don't have typology nightmares. I am the typology nightmare.

This is also how I deal with monsters.

 

[Edgar]

For a brief moment I considered that I could possibly be an ENTJ since I generally relate to them more than I do to other INTJs, and that made me worry that I'm a screwed up extravert, but then I realized that it's not that I hate most people, it's just that I can't stand most of them.

It's a very fine distinction - being an ENTJ misanthrope and being a regular an INTJ, but an important distinction nonetheless.

 

[Forever]

I’m in the weird part of Typology Central again

 

[EJCC]

Imagine it like that episode of Supernatural where ego Dean is arguing with superego Dean.

EJCC anxiously pacing around the room, and anti-EJCC leaning against a wall looking smug.

EJCC: "God, I'm having a lot of feelings right now."

Anti-EJCC, aka CCJE: "You know, you could be a feeler. You've started almost testing like one."

EJCC: "What the hell does that mean? Almost started? No I haven't. I always test as ESTJ."

CCJE: "Everybody says you have a lot of feelings. They call you a cinnamon roll. Hell, you call YOURSELF a cinnamon roll."

EJCC: "That's for comedic effect and also for opening up to people. BECAUSE THEY TOLD ME OPENING UP IS A THING THAT GROWN-UPS DO. Type notwithstanding. And I ought to get Thinker bonus points for having to learn how to do that, right? Versus getting it right away?"

CCJE: "You don't get any Thinker bonus points for being such a sensitive little snowflake. Might as well admit to being an ENFP now."

EJCC: "Shut the fuck up."

CCJE: "Make me. Manic pixie dream girl."


^ and that's when we fistfight.

 

[Metis]

Cinnamon rolls have a lot of feelings?

A character that is very kind and sweet but faces more hardship and suffering than they truly deserve. Comes from the usage of an article headline from 'The Onion' titled 'Beautiful Cinnamon Roll Too Good For This World, Too Pure.' to describe a person or character that is very good but faces a lot of pain in their life.
Percy Jackson fan and tumblrite: OMG, Nico di Angelo is such a cinnamon roll! I hope things turn out okay for him in the next book....
#sweetie #darling #sweety #edgy #hardcore #wubbie
by Tumblrite237 July 10, 2015
Urban Dictionary: cinnamon rolls​

Oh. Hmm! ...Yum.

 

[Metis]

I sometimes have nightmares I am actually a So/Sp as they are said to be disconnected from people and truly cold at their core and thats something id be ashamed off having no care or connection with other people. I only hope I am Sx second.

Sx thing aside, that's an interesting thing to be scared of, "having no care or connection with other people" and being "truly cold at their core". How did it occur to you to worry about that?



I think below is an e6 nightmare:


Metis Meets With the Creator, and the Creator Turns Out to Be Really NICE

CREATOR: Welcome to What Happens After You Die, Metis.

METIS: Thanks, God.

CREATOR: (laughs) God. Yes, alright, whatever.

METIS: Sorry. I don't know what your name is.

CREATOR: That's alright, dear. Would you like a gingerbread cookie and a cup of tea?

METIS: Huh?

CREATOR: Oh my, you're such a wonderful little mortal. Take two cookies, dear.

METIS: Oh. Okay... thank you... So did I do okay?

CREATOR: What do you mean, dear?

METIS: Did I waste my life, or was I successful in somehow doing justice to it?

CREATOR: (giggling) Oh, I don't know, dear.

METIS: What do you mean?

CREATOR: Have another cookie. Well, I don't know, what do you think? Did you like living as a mortal?

METIS: Not really, but it was worth it if I succeeded in doing whatever it was you wanted me to do.

CREATOR: Oh, I don't care what you did in your life, dear.

METIS cries.

CREATOR: Is something wrong, dear?

METIS: It's alright. Don't worry about it. Thank you for the cookies. It was nice to meet you.

Aside: You mean, I wasted my whole life by trying to be worthy of it? You mean, I didn't even fail? I tried for nothing?​

METIS jumps into the first mortal body she sees.


Wait, no, that ending is wrong. Here's the real one:


METIS finds a television set in the afterlife and resigns herself to eternity as a couch potato. What else is there?