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  1. #71
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    Quote Originally Posted by Usehername View Post
    I think she's just referring to the illogical assumption that any one human, regardless of who that human is, could possibly be thoroughly enjoyed by every single other human on the planet. Prolly one of those xxTx moments where the logic filter is grating against her brain loudly.
    That's one way of looking at it. But I think the INTP qualm is the illogical idea that you can compel someone out of a decision that, by definition, must be arrived at autonomously.
    I don't wanna!

  2. #72
    Plumage and Moult proteanmix's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MacGuffin View Post
    Yes, I just don't think 95% of the INTPs can give you that.

    "I, with a deeper instinct, choose a man who compels my strength, who makes enormous demands on me, who does not doubt my courage or my toughness, who does not believe me naive or innocent, who has the courage to treat me like a woman."

    The INTP is a detatched observer. Making enormous demands is out of the INTP wheelhouse.
    Yeah, I have cynicism cloud trailing me. That's a pretty tall order for anyone to fill.

    I guess my expectations are different from what has been voiced in this thread. I don't like turbulent romantic relationships, nor do I think that I'm a turbulent person. I try to match my output to the other person's output. Nor am I sure I want all my buttons pressed in a relationship. Periods of intensity are good but that level of entwinement is exhausting. It just feels like running your car on gas fumes and not anything enduring. You can't realistically expect that level of passion to be sustained? Maybe I'm misunderstanding?

    Pink, I have a question: It seems like your relationships with these guys suffered an abrupt ending. How do you think they would've played out if they naturally ended?
    Relationships have normal ebbs and flows. They do not automatically get better and better when the participants learn more and more about each other. Instead, the participants have to work through the tensions of the relationship (the dialectic) while they learn and group themselves and a parties in a relationships. At times the relationships is very open and sharing. Other time, one or both parties to the relationship need their space, or have other concerns, and the relationship is less open. The theory posits that these cycles occur throughout the life of the relationship as the persons try to balance their needs for privacy and open relationship.
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  3. #73

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    Quote Originally Posted by PinkPiranha View Post
    And why would you be a freeloader? Don't you believe you bring your own unique "brand" to the relationship?
    Not sure. I like to think that I give. But they way I give tends to be more "diffuse" or to many parties at the same time.

    I generally feel like I am (will be) unfair to whatever woman I am in a relationship with.

    I just don't have a lot to give emotionally... an ear to talk to, a shoulder to lean on, not being judgemental in most circumstances... but thats about it.



    Quote Originally Posted by MacGuffin View Post
    "I, with a deeper instinct, choose a man who compels my strength, who makes enormous demands on me, who does not doubt my courage or my toughness, who does not believe me naive or innocent, who has the courage to treat me like a woman."

    The INTP is a detatched observer. Making enormous demands is out of the INTP wheelhouse.
    Sometimes the demands are put-on without realizing it. I used to drive my X-fiance crazy for reasons I never fully understood. Something about being busy/preoccupied with work/school/hobbies. The weird thing is she seemed to like that. The more I tried to do what she actually asked, and spent more time with her, the more she lost interest. I guess I became too little of a challenge.

    Accept the past. Live for the present. Look forward to the future.
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  4. #74
    Senior Member Littlelostnf's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MacGuffin View Post
    Yes, I just don't think 95% of the INTPs can give you that.

    "I, with a deeper instinct, choose a man who compels my strength, who makes enormous demands on me, who does not doubt my courage or my toughness, who does not believe me naive or innocent, who has the courage to treat me like a woman."

    The INTP is a detatched observer. Making enormous demands is out of the INTP wheelhouse.

    Hmmm that's interesting as it seems as if you're taking enormous demands to be something that requires something of you other than being who "you" are. The INTP's I know make those demands whether they know it or not. It's about who they are...I know you guys think you're low maintenance and in many ways you are...but in the ways that float my boat...you do make enormous demands...you're not THAT easy to live with you know.
    for my life is slowed up by thought and the need to understand what I am living.

  5. #75
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    Quote Originally Posted by Littlelostnf View Post
    Hmmm that's interesting as it seems as if you're taking enormous demands to be something that requires something of you other than being who "you" are. The INTP's I know make those demands whether they know it or not. It's about who they are...I know you guys think you're low maintenance and in many ways you are...but in the ways that float my boat...you do make enormous demands...you're not THAT easy to live with you know.
    In what way do we make enormous demands?

  6. #76
    señor member colmena's Avatar
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    Hmm. I do like it when people close the cap on the shower gel.
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    -How beautiful, this pale Endymion hour.
    -What are you talking about?
    -Endymion, my dear. A beautiful youth possessed by the moon.
    -Well, forget about him and get to bed.
    -Yes, my dear.

  7. #77
    Senior Member Littlelostnf's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MacGuffin View Post
    In what way do we make enormous demands?
    When INTP's find someone to share their lives with who truly gets them. It's amazing how much they want their partner to truly understand them...and that my friend is not easy for everyone to do. It's not explicit demands they are implicit.

    It's also about an INTP's partner being alright with themselves..they have to be...and I don't mean in a physical sense...(he's off at the computer or work or in his head and I'm at this party alone) I mean being sure of themselves and not needing alot of demonstration of their partners feelings....that requires something...that places a demand on an INTP's partner right there. Not a bad demand..but a demand

    Does that make sense?....
    for my life is slowed up by thought and the need to understand what I am living.

  8. #78
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    Quote Originally Posted by Littlelostnf View Post
    When INTP's find someone to share their lives with who truly gets them. It's amazing how much they want their partner to truly understand them...and that my friend is not easy for everyone to do. It's not explicit demands they are implicit.
    Why does that float your boat?

  9. #79
    Senior Member Littlelostnf's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MacGuffin View Post
    Why does that float your boat?
    I kept adding on...see above.
    I like how they make me feel about myself...
    That sounds selfish...? Not sure I can explain until I eat...

    Only Cherrios and coffee this am at 9 and nothing else is not good for the thought process.
    for my life is slowed up by thought and the need to understand what I am living.

  10. #80
    Senior Member Littlelostnf's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MacGuffin View Post
    Why does that float your boat?
    or perhaps a mindmate and a soulmate are not that different...........
    for my life is slowed up by thought and the need to understand what I am living.

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