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  1. #1
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    Default INFP turning INTJ?

    Lately some things have been left me wondering about this.

    When I was a child I was a very peaceful and calm being, didn't mind sharing (I actually didn't care), very careless and always immersed in my own world. I didn't like conflicts, so most of the time I would give in just to end whatever blabber was going on, it wasn't much of a loss for me anyways. It's like someone was crying over 0,05€: just give them the fucking coin already, what a pain. If someone even asked for it gently, I was more than willing to give them whatever they wanted.

    I was like this in my first years of middle school, I was naive and I also had the bad luck of entering a class full of dicks who would occasionally pick on me or take advantage of my good nature. I would just ignore them because I couldn't be bothered to stand up and make a scene.

    When I entered high school I was more aware, but I still preferred the peaceful approach. Even when someone wronged me, I would ignore them, bear with it for those few mins and they'd eventually stop. I was optimistic that they would learn on their own, I had some faith in humanity back then. Those same people would act all friendly and later ask me for help during exams and what not. But I didn't care; I was always smart at school, it was an easy ride for me so it was 0 effort for me to help them. It actually was nothing for me, I didn't think I was doing that much for them. Even though we occasionally hanged out together, I was never really part of that group. No one acknowledged me if not 1-2 friend and one girl who I fell for.

    When I entered university I realized how easily I was giving myself away. One day I took a look of myself in the mirror and I felt disgusted by what I had become. Someone that people do not respect despite the kindness, who gets joked on, who is only taken advantage of, who gets understimated and who gets stepped on. I snapped at that image. My pride got so scarred by that image that I decided to change myself. I said "Fucking screw them all. They have gotten on my nerves now. Do you want to challenge me at this game? Fine. I can play by whatever rules you wish and I will win in the end. I always get my fucking victory in the end. You aren't worth of my goodwill, you will only get shit now. You all, no exception."

    I re-examined myself under the Te lens and started correcting myself: I stopped being so generous and available to people. I became colder, stricter, more judgemental, selfish. I was and still am very good accademically-wise, so I dedicated myself to perfecting myself. I developed a huge conficence in my field that was bordering arrogance, I became strictly rational and logical, I started throwing shit to shitters and I enjoyed it. I also realized that you can't trust anyone; I haven't personally experienced the disappointment on my skin, but I've witnessed others being wrecked by it and I imagined how much it would have burnt to put all my faith in someone I got affectionate to and then see that same person betraying my trust or being harmed in some way. I forbid myself to get close to anyone and imposed myself to detach from anyone who was close to me at the time. I closed off to EVERYONE and I started seeing people for the rotting individuals they were. I started seeing emotions and feelings of attachment and love as a weakness. I never really needed anyone, there actually never was someone for me to begin with and I've always done fine all this time alone, do I don't see why I would need someone now. I started feeding off my state of indepence and I became more misanthropic and nihilistic. The more time I spent alone, the more my ego fattened up as my knowledge and self-awareness were accumulating. I started being more cunning, I started planning things way in advance and I started seeking opportunities and acting behind the scenes. I was surprisingly naturally good at all those things. I became very efficient. I was reborn.

    In that period I started investigating psychology, personality disorders, MBTI ecc and would often score in the schizoid/narcissistic department, or as an INTJ and my ego would just reinforce the idea that I was that and that I was shining in my highest and most perfect form ever. All that was backed up by a long streak of success in real life, by a newly acquired sense of satisfaction and high confidence. All this potential I was holding in was now being released. No longer the pathetic individual I had seen in the mirror, no longer such a poor excuse of a man. I even overanalyzed my type, in order to narrow down what my true self was and confirm that the new me was the real me. I never took the tests before that change, so I don't know how I would have scored back then. I only know that now I either score INTJ or INTP and both descriptions totally fit me. I tried reading other profiles and the only ones I can see fitting for my old self are either INFP and INFJ gone wrong or a INTP 9.

    I also studied functions and I have very strong Ni(90%) and Ti(95%), followed by Te(80%) and Ne(70%). I am a very bad observer (low Se) but I can recall past memories very easily (decent Si?). Fe and Fi are so frozen and forgotten that I wonder whether they still exist, but they most likely do, since sometimes I spontaneously help someone who needs assistance. The fact is that it really costs me 0 effort to help and my assistance is usually quite significant despite the low energy invested. I justified it by thinking that it's wiser to be liked for it in the work place, even though I hold back from helping like before. My Ni is what carried me all along in accademics. I really do nothing the whole time and just figure shit out and express it in my ways, which aren't really proper or "orthodox", but are correct and still get validated by professors who unwillingly nod. Whatever action I do, is passed under the Te lens and when I'm not talking to anyone or minding my own business, I engage in huge amount of Ti. I haven't understood Ne much, but if Ne is related to generating ideas and possibilities, then I also have a high Ne, as my mind is able to endlessly generate possibilities and unprobable events and speculate about them.

    HOWEVER, it could just be that I developed very high Ti and Te afterwards and that before I was an F. It's hard to tell when I score high in all these functions. I have had hardship understanding whether I was an INTP with very good Ni or an INTJ with very good Ti. I also wondered whether I was an INFJ with Ni-Ti loop (that made sense), since such type also scores as a schizoid (a personality disorder which I've suspected to have for some year), but the profile didn't fit. An INFJ who repressed his Fe and substituted it with Ti, therefore maining Ni and Ti (which are very high for me).

    So, do you think I was an INFx who got fed up and turned INTJ because it was "better"? Is such change even possible? Or perhaps I was a very immature INTx who finally decided to move his ass? The functions are there to back up some different profiles. In any case, if I am indeed wearing an INTJ mask, if I am indeed using another persona, then I must be doing a really fucking awesome job at it.

  2. #2
    Entertaining Cracker five sounds's Avatar
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    You hem me in -- behind and before;
    you have laid your hand upon me.
    Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
    too lofty for me to attain.
    Likes /DG/, Chthonic, chubber, ceecee, Cygnus and 1 others liked this post

  3. #3
    Senior Member Jaguar's Avatar
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    Quit trying so hard. Relax.

    Fwiw, over the years I collected a bunch of quotes from self-typed INFPs. Every person I showed them to typed them as NTJs. Chew on that.
    And while you're chewing, read Willy Shakespeare's Hamlet: To thine own self be true.
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  4. #4
    @.~*virinaĉo*~.@ Totenkindly's Avatar
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    I re-examined myself under the Te lens and started correcting myself: I stopped being so generous and available to people. I became colder, stricter, more judgemental, selfish. I was and still am very good accademically-wise, so I dedicated myself to perfecting myself. I developed a huge conficence in my field that was bordering arrogance, I became strictly rational and logical, I started throwing shit to shitters and I enjoyed it. I also realized that you can't trust anyone; I haven't personally experienced the disappointment on my skin, but I've witnessed others being wrecked by it and I imagined how much it would have burnt to put all my faith in someone I got affectionate to and then see that same person betraying my trust or being harmed in some way. I forbid myself to get close to anyone and imposed myself to detach from anyone who was close to me at the time. I closed off to EVERYONE and I started seeing people for the rotting individuals they were. I started seeing emotions and feelings of attachment and love as a weakness. I never really needed anyone, there actually never was someone for me to begin with and I've always done fine all this time alone, do I don't see why I would need someone now. I started feeding off my state of indepence and I became more misanthropic and nihilistic. The more time I spent alone, the more my ego fattened up as my knowledge and self-awareness were accumulating. I started being more cunning, I started planning things way in advance and I started seeking opportunities and acting behind the scenes. I was surprisingly naturally good at all those things. I became very efficient. I was reborn.
    Congratulations?

    But I'm not sure this sounds like a positive thing. You can be a Te-style person without believing much of this, you simply can change the way you approach situations and people versus developing a cynical, mistrusting, judgmental selfish side.

    now, the thing with INFP and INTJ is that Fi and Te are flip sides. It's commong for INFPs to develop some Te skills when they get older in order to get things done. It's also common for INTJs to develop some Fi to ground their Te. So it's rather unclear what happened with you... but the fact that the transition to a more "Te" style (as you view it) is a negative progression in terms of how you engage and view others, it makes it very difficult to determine what type you "really" are or what happened. Your paragraph here in fact is extreme enough to possibly be parody, so I'm not sure how to take it.

    And yeah, your type label doesn't even matter, you're just trying to find yourself.
    "Hey Capa -- We're only stardust." ~ "Sunshine"

    “Pleasure to me is wonder—the unexplored, the unexpected, the thing that is hidden and the changeless thing that lurks behind superficial mutability. To trace the remote in the immediate; the eternal in the ephemeral; the past in the present; the infinite in the finite; these are to me the springs of delight and beauty.” ~ H.P. Lovecraft

  5. #5
    Suave y Fuerte BadOctopus's Avatar
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    You can't actually change your type, but you can suppress it. It's possible that you are an INFP who, out of necessity or as a defense mechanism, felt like you had to become harder and more emotionally distant in order to survive.

    To be honest, you've never struck me as a genuine INTJ. I just figured, since you mentioned that you have schizoid tendencies, they were just manifesting themselves as INTJ-like behavior.

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by BadOctopus View Post
    You can't actually change your type, but you can suppress it. It's possible that you are an INFP who, out of necessity or as a defense mechanism, felt like you had to become harder and more emotionally distant in order to survive.

    To be honest, you've never struck me as a genuine INTJ. I just figured, since you mentioned that you have schizoid tendencies, they were just manifesting themselves as INTJ-like behavior.
    I've always been dwelling on the J/P dichotomy. The I and N are 100% sure, the T is currently obscenely strong, so I always gave for granted INTx. What I tried to do was narrowing down whether I was INTJ or INTP. Read lots of profiles and discussions on functions but the problem was that I could identify with them all to a very good extent. I never understood why one of those description should have excluded the other one and viceversa. I got told in more than an occasion that the function stacks are very different and that it's easy to differentiate the two, but they also gave for granted that I hadn't developed them all. So I tried investigating the weak function instead, but even then there was some common ground between INTJ and INTP (very bad Fe and Se).

    Because of my indecisiveness in pinning down my type and generating endless potential types, I got told that I was most likely INTP: I have strong Ni and Te, so I'm supposedly INTJ, but I also have strong Ti and Ne so INTP could fit very well and indeed both descriptions apply to a very good degree. Even looking at individual letters, I'm not so "stick-in-the-ass" J like extreme INTJs but I'm not so random and unplanned like extreme INTPs. I do plan, I do seek closure, but I'm open to possibilities and I'm also lazy. I do what REALLY NEEDS to be done but I dismiss everything else as irrelevant. This latter could also related to the general attitude of not caring and a good degree of anhedonia, which is typical of schizoids. At the same time, I found out that INFJs who enter a Ti-Ni loop by repressing their Fe are very likely to be diagnosed with SPD, which would answer many questionss; however, looking at an INFJ profile, little fits. Same thing could happen to an ISTP who enters the Ni-Ti loop and for a moment the ISTP profile rang some bell, since I always liked dirtying my hands with tools and building and repairing and crafting stuff and the retarded Se in this case could justify my being a bad observer which was substituted by Ti. It would also justify why I've always liked ISTP protagonists in stories or games or why I would always have liked to be a warrior and go there fighting in the midst of action, direct and frontal or why I always play the warrior class in games (that's minor tho). Then I read the INFP description and it sounded a bit like my past self, but I could have just been an INTP 9wx. On the enneagram I usually score 5w4 and once scored 4w5; I read that especially the latter is very common among INFPs but then I read the profile of a 4 and it was too extreme and emotional to be me. I like being unique, I am relieved to be different from other people in some departments, and I like to be able to finally express my likes and weird hobbies. But then all the "artsy" stuff kicks in and that's totally not me. 5w4 on the other side is common among INTPs and is actually a better fit and could cover the points of "wanting to find my true self". At the same time though, the function stacking could very well fit the one of an ENTJ and I actually am more extrovert when around people I consider companions and who usually are introverts. When alone, I'm extremely introvert but when with other introverts, I am like an ENTP or ENTJ. However, the last 2 are less likely because I do feel drained in very crowded environments and being alone is rejuvenating, so I would pin down the I.

    This was my analysis and why I came to an halt on pinning down my true type. Started with just a doubt on 1 type and ended up being able to identify or mimic 6 types. Do you smell INTP in the paragraph above?

  7. #7
    @.~*virinaĉo*~.@ Totenkindly's Avatar
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    MBTI types: Like Pokemon, you gotta catch 'em all.




    EDIT: Ran across this image on PersonalityHacker. Not sure if it's helpful, but here you go. (It's spoilered since it's large.)




    When You ALMOST Know Your Personality Type (aka "Between Two Types") - Personality Hacker : Personality Hacker
    "Hey Capa -- We're only stardust." ~ "Sunshine"

    “Pleasure to me is wonder—the unexplored, the unexpected, the thing that is hidden and the changeless thing that lurks behind superficial mutability. To trace the remote in the immediate; the eternal in the ephemeral; the past in the present; the infinite in the finite; these are to me the springs of delight and beauty.” ~ H.P. Lovecraft
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  8. #8
    reborn PeaceBaby's Avatar
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    Everything here smells like an Ni construct, not an Fi one. This is about the adoption of variable paradigms to produce a desired future outcome via the altering of present reality. If it were about Fi, we would see evidence of valuation, and there's literally nothing of that here.
    "Remember always that you not only have the right to be an individual, you have an obligation to be one."
    Eleanor Roosevelt


    "When people see some things as beautiful,
    other things become ugly.
    When people see some things as good,
    other things become bad."
    Lao Tzu, Tao Te Ching
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  9. #9
    failed poetry slam career chubber's Avatar
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    So it has nothing to do with ESTJ shadow of the INFP coming out under stress? moving along then

  10. #10
    reborn PeaceBaby's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by chubber View Post
    So it has nothing to do with ESTJ shadow of the INFP coming out under stress? moving along then
    You wanna see what that looks like for realsies?
    "Remember always that you not only have the right to be an individual, you have an obligation to be one."
    Eleanor Roosevelt


    "When people see some things as beautiful,
    other things become ugly.
    When people see some things as good,
    other things become bad."
    Lao Tzu, Tao Te Ching

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