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  1. #1
    Post Human Post Qlip's Avatar
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    Default A question for ExxPs

    Do you ever feel like the propensity to go with the flow, get in over your head, the need to work/learn/play using your surroundings, situations and people as essentially silly and all too revealing?

    Even though there much to gain in improvisation and that's one of our skills, are you ever frustrated by your inability to guess what you're going to be up to in even the short-term sometimes, the hesitation to plan details because of the unlikeliness of those plans holding?

    Is dealing with fallout just something you're resigned to?

    Have you found some sort of EP dignity?

  2. #2
    Entertaining Cracker five sounds's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Qlip View Post
    Do you ever feel like the propensity to go with the flow, get in over your head, the need to work/learn/play using your surroundings, situations and people as essentially silly and all too revealing?

    Even though there much to gain in improvisation and that's one of our skills, are you ever frustrated by your inability to guess what you're going to be up to in even the short-term sometimes, the hesitation to plan details because of the unlikeliness of those plans holding?

    Is dealing with fallout just something you're resigned to?

    Have you found some sort of EP dignity?
    Lol I know what you mean.

    I do two things: one is I try to keep plans that I've made. I have a fixed schedule and I know when I'll be not working. If I make plans with a friend for one of those, I put it in my phone and do my best not to flake.

    Another is if it's a situation where I feel like I have no idea where I'll be and how free or busy I'll be, I say that. I usually use a self depreciating comment like "I don't have the time management skills to know if I'll be free that day. Can I call you a couple days before and let you know?" Or "I'm working on some things, can I call you when I'm done and see where you are?"

    If all else fails, I just apologize for dropping the ball and do my best to reschedule something soon.
    You hem me in -- behind and before;
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    Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
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  3. #3
    Post Human Post Qlip's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by five sounds View Post
    Lol I know what you mean.

    I do two things: one is I try to keep plans that I've made. I have a fixed schedule and I know when I'll be not working. If I make plans with a friend for one of those, I put it in my phone and do my best not to flake.

    Another is if it's a situation where I feel like I have no idea where I'll be and how free or busy I'll be, I say that. I usually use a self depreciating comment like "I don't have the time management skills to know if I'll be free that day. Can I call you a couple days before and let you know?" Or "I'm working on some things, can I call you when I'm done and see where you are?"

    If all else fails, I just apologize for dropping the ball and do my best to reschedule something soon.
    Haha.

    Ah, yeah, it's similar to how I handle things. I am really careful on over-scheduling, give lots of breathing room, and generally say no if I'm unsure about things.

    I'm aware of my quirks, but I'm just generally jealous that whole 'put together' image is not within my reach. I think it would look good on me.

  4. #4
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    I was known for self-regulation and discipline in my younger years. NEVER in my life have I felt the need to plan anything......my proactivity was lucid. No schedule or numbers, just raw, continuous action and exertion of willpower. When something needed to be done or a rule be followed, I dropped the damn pad and pen and DID IT. Nothing gets things done faster.


    I didn't just trust my instincts -- I streamlined them. I focused them. Wielded them like a weapon.


    I'm in a lazy phase right now. Anyone can slack off or discipline themselves if they so choose or if their environment demands it. Even a Pe-dom can be highly efficient and proactive, but those who cannot do, think.
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  5. #5
    Post Human Post Qlip's Avatar
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    @Nihilogen I've never questioned the ability for an EP to be effective. That idea is one of those easily believed disinformation campaigns launched by those who be jealous. Or, actually it's ways of (some) J's pointing out that we fail in ways that they wouldn't.

    As I said, it's just this cartoon character stigma that gets to me, and being 4w5 it's a difficult image to wield. I think maybe I just haven't resigned myself to being a whirlwind aspect, yet.

  6. #6
    The Dark Lord The Wailing Specter's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Qlip View Post
    Do you ever feel like the propensity to go with the flow, get in over your head, the need to work/learn/play using your surroundings, situations and people as essentially silly and all too revealing?

    Even though there much to gain in improvisation and that's one of our skills, are you ever frustrated by your inability to guess what you're going to be up to in even the short-term sometimes, the hesitation to plan details because of the unlikeliness of those plans holding?

    Is dealing with fallout just something you're resigned to?

    Have you found some sort of EP dignity?
    Yes, yes, yes, and yes.

    - - - Updated - - -

    Quote Originally Posted by Qlip View Post
    Do you ever feel like the propensity to go with the flow, get in over your head, the need to work/learn/play using your surroundings, situations and people as essentially silly and all too revealing?

    Even though there much to gain in improvisation and that's one of our skills, are you ever frustrated by your inability to guess what you're going to be up to in even the short-term sometimes, the hesitation to plan details because of the unlikeliness of those plans holding?

    Is dealing with fallout just something you're resigned to?

    Have you found some sort of EP dignity?
    Yes, yes, yes, and yes.
    Enneagram: 6w7 (phobic) > 2w1 > 9w1
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  7. #7
    Senior Member ceecee's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by five sounds View Post
    Lol I know what you mean.

    I do two things: one is I try to keep plans that I've made. I have a fixed schedule and I know when I'll be not working. If I make plans with a friend for one of those, I put it in my phone and do my best not to flake.

    Another is if it's a situation where I feel like I have no idea where I'll be and how free or busy I'll be, I say that. I usually use a self depreciating comment like "I don't have the time management skills to know if I'll be free that day. Can I call you a couple days before and let you know?" Or "I'm working on some things, can I call you when I'm done and see where you are?"

    If all else fails, I just apologize for dropping the ball and do my best to reschedule something soon.
    I'm laughing because my two ENFP friends say things similar to this regularly. I say- well, at least you're being honest.
    I like to rock n' roll all night and *part* of every day. I usually have errands... I can only rock from like 1-3.

  8. #8
    Entertaining Cracker five sounds's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ceecee View Post
    I'm laughing because my two ENFP friends say things similar to this regularly. I say- well, at least you're being honest.
    it's a fine balance between
    a) faking it cuz you know you can make it happen and they don't need to know how disorganized you are

    and

    b) being up front about where you're at so no false hope and letdown happens

    i've gotten better at it. i hope to continue to improve.
    You hem me in -- behind and before;
    you have laid your hand upon me.
    Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
    too lofty for me to attain.

  9. #9
    As Long As It Takes.... Redbone's Avatar
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    Yes...by doing as little as possible in my off time. Well, this only sometimes...

    I used to flake on people...even in the middle of being out with them. That was a very long time ago and I'd never do something like that now (even if I'm tempted to). My default is, "I don't know because I don't have my calendar in front of me. Can I get back to you?"

    I think I manage well because I don't have much free time to play with! Big open time slots, vacation/school breaks can cause manic-panic in me. I'll fill it up with all kinds of stuff and then hit some of them or not...I never know ahead of time.
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  10. #10
    Emperor/Dictator kyuuei's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Qlip View Post
    Do you ever feel like the propensity to go with the flow, get in over your head, the need to work/learn/play using your surroundings, situations and people as essentially silly and all too revealing?

    Even though there much to gain in improvisation and that's one of our skills, are you ever frustrated by your inability to guess what you're going to be up to in even the short-term sometimes, the hesitation to plan details because of the unlikeliness of those plans holding?

    Is dealing with fallout just something you're resigned to?

    Have you found some sort of EP dignity?
    Hmm.. I think I used to have a lot of reservations about dedicating myself to things. Even now, I'll say, "Oh, sure, I'll check to see. No promises, but I would like to go." Because I hate making promises I cannot keep and being flaky is easy for anyone--exxp or otherwise.

    It also really breaks my heart when I make plans, and people don't show up or bail out last minute. It makes me really frowny faced. So, there are reservations about making plans at all. Especially as I age, I find people are in their own little worlds and don't venture out as often as they once did.. less to escape from I guess.

    But in reality, I take things personal that aren't personal at all. Juuuust ask my boyfriend how many times I get REALLY upset over the fact he let me sleep vs calling me and waking me up because I wanted to talk to him and be there for him but also I passed out waiting and he took that opportunity for some much needed solitude.

    It takes a lot for me to calm down and not take stuff like that personal. And I try my best not to stretch myself thin while also being there for people. But I think my tougher skin should be blamed on the army. Had I not been through that first, I don't know if I could even handle some of the personalities that are now the closest in my life.
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