So fair warning, this is rather personal, but I need advice.
My partner and I have been together for 4 years now, but we've recently started living together. It's not ideal, due to family issues, but it's surviving.
We've both been diagnosed with depression, but I've noticed that our coping methods, and the nature of the depression itself, is sooooooo different. What I need to cope is the exact opposite of what they do, and vice versa. This has become a problem.
I don't like things to be....unruly...or anxious. I want to take care of things, I want to take care of people, I want to take care of my partner in any way that needs to be done. It's who I am. Here's the thing though, when I try to help them, they don't do much. It's hard to get them to tell me anything personal, or anything that can clue me in on their issues. THIS DRIVES ME NUTS.
I understand that as an unemotional person they want to deal with their issues themself, but they aren't really. Every issue gets left alone until it's so bad that it explodes. They don't confront their issues. When I speak up about my thoughts and feelings, we talk, come up with a solution, but they KEEP DOING THE THING? It's like a cycle.
So please, any INTPs, please help me understand. I feel very disconnected and all my attempts at involvement have been less than effective.