My partner and I are very pessimistic and kind of depressive people, so we often tend to over think about the ways our happy times will come to an end.
Yesterday we were chatting about the ways we would break up with each other [which may sound a little weird, but we just share all kind of inappropriate thoughts] and we began to compare our different break up experiences, and it seems that we tend to behave similarly.
We both use the ''Love Sabotage'' method
Since we rather not drastically dishearten people, the classic, quick, boring solution is out of question, we choose instead to make them reach a point in which they start to hate us so much that they just leave.
We make everything that is possible and subtle enough, or not really subtle, to make the other person change their mind about the way they feel about us, without realizing that is exactly what we want because we got bored and don't want to be with them anymore.
We would behave and do the opposite of what they fell in love for us for. Which is relatively easy since we both really like change and experiencing different things.
[e.g My first love fell for me because I was a really sweet girl, who dressed like a doll and was extremely shy. Since he started being too much ''sugary'' and suffocating I got tired of him and I hated being treated like a cute child. So I got into Heavy Metal stuff and dressed all in black leather and got all the broken clothes he hated so much. And it was also a really interesting experiment which actually turned me into the person I am now. Therefore was a sincere change.
I also treated him kind of roughly and also disregarded his needs of being told that I love him.
Whenever he began his complaints I would say that I just want to talk about interesting stuff instead of whining about all the problems our relationship has.
I occasionally made him cry, which irritated me a lot, and I would roll my eyes and say '' are you done now? quit being such a girl'']
Then in the end we both ended our relationships crying.
I cried because I realized that all my efforts to avoid suffering and to try not to break the other person's heart were useless, since both of us hurt even more.
But even if I sound like an asshole, I sincerely wish my love couldn't hurt other people.
He cried because he was trying to make the other person feel shitty about leaving.
He's the true asshole.
Anyway between us it's working a bit different.
Empathy is more balanced, and we probably would try more creative methods to leave each other since this was already told. We always try to impress ourselves more.
IS this something INFPs and INTPs tend to do a lot? Or are we just insane sociopaths?
Doesany other type relate to this as well?