INFP, ESTJ Duality??

[SD45T-2]

@<a href="http://www.typologycentral.com/forums/members/5999.html" target="_blank">PeaceBaby</a> & others kind of beat me to a point I was typing up....but I'm posting it anyway.
This post here is not embodying what I am going to bring up, but it does show how we tend to think of our own way/view as "right" and something else as being "obviously wrong", when, well, it may not be objective at all. You touch on this also, but the wording exemplifies an ESTJ view better than Peacebaby's does.

And now, my novella:

From my viewpoint, ESTJs' inferior Fi can lead them to assert their personal preferences as a moral/ethical standard. In order to accept & fulfill their own personal feelings, their psychology “converts” it into an objectively correct model, and they will go to impressive lengths to back this up with “facts” and “logic”. So much of it is preference for what they are familiar and experienced with (Si). It really has no moral value. An illustration of this is how countries in the past would colonize other lands and degrade the colonized land as “less civilized” because the colonialists had set up their experience of life and their preferences as “normal” and even as more moral.

This is something many SJs demonstrate in their attitudes, but it’s scariest in ESTJs because they make good arguments for it. They convince and lead others with this thinking. They convince themselves this is “for their own good” too, effectively dismissing those who do not comply as being rebellious in a self-destructive way.

I suppose I feel I see through this and recognize they are veiling personal preferences with objective rules that force others to conform.

I feel this “rebelliousness” or “bad attitude” projected onto me and that is what I find hurtful and what makes me angry.

I can deal with moods in people - irritability, snappiness, bluntness - that’s fine. What bothers me is the polite, composed demeanor of someone who is ramming others into a mold that is totally arbitrary, but it’s under the guise of “this is THE best way and anyone who doesn’t fit it is a degenerate”.

 

[Yaru]

That was weird. haha

A question> why all ESTJs I've seen in thi forum have weird Caps letters and numbers as nickname? :O

 

[SD45T-2]

That was weird. haha

Monty Python gets even weirder than that. Like the knight who hits people with a chicken.

A question> why all ESTJs I've seen in thi forum have weird Caps letters and numbers as nickname? :O

EMD SD45T-2 - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

I have no idea what the significance of EJCC is.

 

[EJCC]

I have no idea what the significance of EJCC is.

That would take away the mystery!

A question> why all ESTJs I've seen in thi forum have weird Caps letters and numbers as nickname? :O

There have been more of us in the past, but SD and I are the only ones who stuck around.

Other examples:
[MENTION=7195]WickedQueen[/MENTION]
[MENTION=14710]feisty[/MENTION]
[MENTION=7425]Max[/MENTION] (who later claimed to be "ISTP" )
[MENTION=1988]sui generis[/MENTION]

(tagging them all in case they come back. I miss those jerks.)

 

[Yaru]

That would take away the mystery!


There have been more of us in the past, but SD and I are the only ones who stuck around.

Other examples:
[MENTION=7195]WickedQueen[/MENTION]
[MENTION=14710]feisty[/MENTION]
[MENTION=7425]Max[/MENTION] (who later claimed to be "ISTP" )
[MENTION=1988]sui generis[/MENTION]

(tagging them all in case they come back. I miss those jerks.)

Aw.cIm sorry you've been left alone.

Sui Generis must be Argentine like me.

 

[bugy]

Hi there,
old topic but want to say something as I am in relationship with ESTJ, and I am INFP (english is my 2nd language btw)

so, she is ESTJ and everything work very very good. I live the dream I would say. At first, the first day we need to adapt each other that's true. For exemple, she is very details for some things I did not care at all ^^ and I was sensitive too, coz everything she thinks she says . So i was not used to that haha...but it's not bad ! I mean, in a couple , the key for me is communication.
As it works very well. Coz I know that she says things not for bothering me or waht, it is jus she needs to let you know. So now I don't take as criticism but more like an information.

She is very very sweet and take care of me. The first woman I met in my life like this. She gives me love, she is every expressive too so I enjoy that.

We have many many common points, she loves reading, she likes playing , she loves talking about many things in life. She is very open minded. She likes to travel. She needs calm too, she hates to have argument, and as a INFP I hate too. I don't like conflict so she is ! perfect. If we have conflict we just talk a peace way and kiss at the end

I have never felt this before, she is like a woman for me and I am for her.

The hardest thing actually, it was not about personnality thing. It was just her religion in the middle lol she is protestant and I was....atheist or not really, just did not have any religion.
First it was hard for her but then she understand me as I understand her. She wanted me to come at the church with her (not for her religion, just to be with her) so I say ok but only sometimes and not every sunday (INFP we like to have choices...) so I made her understand this, and she is ok of course.
Now thanks to her, I met new people, I go sometimes for meeting talking about Bible thing and Life, and it's very interestings. Even if it was strange for to talk about these things, I find the conversation more interesting than with my own friends sometimes. I am very curious and love to ask myself questions about Life. My g/f gave me this opportunity to meet educated people and very kind people too.

So, at first I would say, INFP and ESTJ have to adapt. ESTJ say what they think. INFP we think but we do not dare to say it. I improve a lot thnaks to her. For exemple now, I say "no" to my boss if something is bad or bothers me.

we always say that ESTJ like to micro manage, and it's annoying to INFP. It's not true for me at least. She wants to manage only at work. In our couple, I can manage many things and if I do not agree I tell her. No problem. And actually, sometimes, I prefer she manages things, coz I can be lazy and count on her.

So metting Love in INFP ESTJ relationship is totally possible.

 

[Ghost]

Aww, so cute, [MENTION=26527]bugy[/MENTION]!