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Did I just display Fe earlier?

Destiny

A wannabe dog
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Ok so I got back my exam paper today and I failed my exam. Then my teacher got angry with me and yelled at me.

And I felt so sad I started tearing up in school in front of my classmates.



Then there is another time when I made a mistake at work and my manager started scolding me. Then I started crying on the spot and all my coworkers ended up comforting me.


Why do I have such a difficult time controlling my emotions whenever I feel sad? Why do I always end up crying in front of people whenever I feel sad? Is it my Fe that causes me to act like this?
 

Evee

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EJCC

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Sounds like you were being human.
 

Destiny

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It has nothing to do with Fe.

Or maybe this is the difference between introverts and extroverts.
If someone yells at an extrovert, the extrovert would yell back. But if someone yells at an introvert, the introvert would either cry or walk away from the person.
I have an ESFP friend and whenever someone yells at her she would either insult them or she would badmouth them behind their back, she doesn't take shit from anyone.
Whereas I would just break down and cry whenever someone yells at me.
I have always thought this is an Fe-Fi thing, but maybe this is more of an introvert-extrovert thing.
 

EJCC

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Or maybe this is the difference between introverts and extroverts.
If someone yells at an extrovert, the extrovert would yell back. But if someone yells at an introvert, the introvert would either cry or walk away from the person.
Extroverts get hurt feelings and cry, too. That is definitely not type-related.

You could make an argument that whether someone is more likely to back down, vs. argue back, is type-related, but even then it heavily depends on the person and the situation, in a way that isn't reliably linked to type.
 

Fluffywolf

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It might be Fe if the reason you are crying is because of the horrible pain and frustration the teacher must be feeling for failing at his job.
 

Destiny

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It might be Fe if the reason you are crying is because of the horrible pain and frustration the teacher must be feeling for failing at his job.


I don't know why I cried either, my tears just felt like dropping down at that time and I am unable to control it.
Anyway, despite my teacher yelling at me and hurting my feelings, I still care about my teacher though, and I do feel really bad for failing that exam. I can understand why he reacted the way he did.
 

Fluffywolf

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I don't know why I cried either, my tears just felt like dropping down at that time and I am unable to control it.
Anyway, despite my teacher yelling at me and hurting my feelings, I still care about my teacher though, and I do feel really bad for failing that exam. I can understand why he reacted the way he did.

Actually, my post was more of a joke.

Actual Fe is not quite as simple as what I made it out to be, and of course comes in many shapes and sizes.

For example. In me Fe shows itself through my willingness and ability to formulate my opinions as recognizable as possible for the intended reader. Not because I want to be understood myself, but because I want others to understand. Fe is my fragile link to other people. I sometimes feel that without it, I would truely become a hermit.

But Fe comes in all shapes and sizes. Wether it be laughing at a joke that you didn't think was funny, or force feeding someone your ideals because you think you save them by doing so (yeah, Fe is not infallible). The only consistency in Fe is that it puts a high value on someone elses well-being. Not objectively, but subjectively.

Also, it is very likely that Fe was at least a part for your experiences, but it would probably be imprudent to chalk the experience up to Fe entirely. No single action is every truely exclusively Fe.
 

five sounds

MyPeeSmellsLikeCoffee247
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Or maybe this is the difference between introverts and extroverts.
If someone yells at an extrovert, the extrovert would yell back. But if someone yells at an introvert, the introvert would either cry or walk away from the person.
I have an ESFP friend and whenever someone yells at her she would either insult them or she would badmouth them behind their back, she doesn't take shit from anyone.
Whereas I would just break down and cry whenever someone yells at me.
I have always thought this is an Fe-Fi thing, but maybe this is more of an introvert-extrovert thing.

I'm ENFP and I've cried in front of my boss before. I very rarely yell back and my first reaction to being yelled at is to apologize and cry.
 

Avocado

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I'm ENFP and I've cried in front of my boss before. I very rarely yell back and my first reaction to being yelled at is to apologize and cry.

OMG, me too! Only difference is I'll try my best to fake smile until I find a private place to let it all out.
 

Bush

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Feeling (thereby Fe) doesn't have anything to do with negative emotions, no.
 

Fluffywolf

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Feeling (thereby Fe) doesn't have anything to do with negative emotions, no.

Fe can cause negative emotions. But you are indeed right that negative emotions are not Fe.
 

Destiny

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Actually, my post was more of a joke.

Actual Fe is not quite as simple as what I made it out to be, and of course comes in many shapes and sizes.

For example. In me Fe shows itself through my willingness and ability to formulate my opinions as recognizable as possible for the intended reader. Not because I want to be understood myself, but because I want others to understand. Fe is my fragile link to other people. I sometimes feel that without it, I would truely become a hermit.

But Fe comes in all shapes and sizes. Wether it be laughing at a joke that you didn't think was funny, or force feeding someone your ideals because you think you save them by doing so (yeah, Fe is not infallible). The only consistency in Fe is that it puts a high value on someone elses well-being. Not objectively, but subjectively.

Also, it is very likely that Fe was at least a part for your experiences, but it would probably be imprudent to chalk the experience up to Fe entirely. No single action is every truely exclusively Fe.


This is interesting, thank you for sharing your opinion. :)
I find it interesting that both INTPs and INFJs use Fe, but the way we use Fe differs from each other.

For example, as an INFJ, I often find myself often subconsciously putting other people's needs before my own needs. I will give an example here. Each time before I open my mouth, I will make sure that my words doesn't offend anyone. Even a simple SMS or text message will take me at least 10 minutes to write, because I am always rephrasing my words to make sure that my texts doesn't sound offensive in any ways. I also often use lots of emoticons in emails and text messages to make my messages sound more lighthearted and make people feel more comfortable around me. Whenever someone is mean toward me, or if someone hates me, my instinctual reaction is to start blaming myself.
I have a difficult time being mean toward anyone, even toward people I dislike, I am also still nice and courteous toward them. Whenever my friends are angry with me, I start feeling upset to the point whereby I get physically ill.
I need peace and harmony in my environment at all times.
 

five sounds

MyPeeSmellsLikeCoffee247
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OMG, me too! Only difference is I'll try my best to fake smile until I find a private place to let it all out.

Lol yeah me too. Usually I can but that one time I just lost it I guess.
 

Avocado

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This is interesting, thank you for sharing your opinion. :)
I find it interesting that both INTPs and INFJs use Fe, but the way we use Fe differs from each other.

For example, as an INFJ, I often find myself often subconsciously putting other people's needs before my own needs. I will give an example here. Each time before I open my mouth, I will make sure that my words doesn't offend anyone. Even a simple SMS or text message will take me at least 10 minutes to write, because I am always rephrasing my words to make sure that my texts doesn't sound offensive in any ways. I also often use lots of emoticons in emails and text messages to make my messages sound more lighthearted and make people feel more comfortable around me. Whenever someone is mean toward me, or if someone hates me, my instinctual reaction is to start blaming myself.
I have a difficult time being mean toward anyone, even toward people I dislike, I am also still nice and courteous toward them. Whenever my friends are angry with me, I start feeling upset to the point whereby I get physically ill.
I need peace and harmony in my environment at all times.

I do, too...though I seriously doubt I'm a J. I'm too messy.
 
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Why do I have such a difficult time controlling my emotions whenever I feel sad? Why do I always end up crying in front of people whenever I feel sad? Is it my Fe that causes me to act like this?


I'm quite new on the forum and I can't say if Fe is expressing itself in this very example.

But I think crying is, beyond a sign of sensitivity and human feelings, a sign of courage as well, mainly in some situations in which ones society would rather teach us to shut up and be discret and all.

One of my deep ego needs is to feel strong so I don't cry and prefer to be arrogant and so on than to show some feelings IF I AM SURROUNDED BY STRANGERS:ninja:.

Like you, it already happened to me to cry spontaneously in a "surprise situation".

Last time this "bad surprise" happened to me was into an hospital for a checking.
I was not directly concerned about that but seeing some old people in bad health did something to me.

And...I arrived in the checking room in front of the doctor being very surprised to see me this way:shrug:.


I hate feeling some sadness, but once I tell myself "come on you are just being human!" I allow myself this freedom.
Yes, I see that as a freedom. You don't depend on others' points of view, you're just being yourself.

:)
 

PeaceBaby

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With all respect to you Complexity, none of what's below specifically means you use Fe.

For example, as an INFJ, I often find myself often subconsciously putting other people's needs before my own needs. I will give an example here. Each time before I open my mouth, I will make sure that my words doesn't offend anyone. Even a simple SMS or text message will take me at least 10 minutes to write, because I am always rephrasing my words to make sure that my texts doesn't sound offensive in any ways. I also often use lots of emoticons in emails and text messages to make my messages sound more lighthearted and make people feel more comfortable around me. Whenever someone is mean toward me, or if someone hates me, my instinctual reaction is to start blaming myself.
I have a difficult time being mean toward anyone, even toward people I dislike, I am also still nice and courteous toward them. Whenever my friends are angry with me, I start feeling upset to the point whereby I get physically ill.
I need peace and harmony in my environment at all times.

It does speak to enneagram 9 but as for pointing to functions, could be either Fe or Fi.
 
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