• You are currently viewing our forum as a guest, which gives you limited access to view most discussions and access our other features. By joining our free community, you will have access to additional post topics, communicate privately with other members (PM), view blogs, respond to polls, upload content, and access many other special features. Registration is fast, simple and absolutely free, so please join our community today! Just click here to register. You should turn your Ad Blocker off for this site or certain features may not work properly. If you have any problems with the registration process or your account login, please contact us by clicking here.

Why do others hate INFJs?

prplchknz

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 11, 2007
Messages
34,397
MBTI Type
yupp
It doesn't prove anything. :shock:
And I was not offended or semi-offended. :shock:
My response was meant to elaborate my statement in previous comment and it was not meant to exclusively respond to you.

it does, you just can't see it. you're blinded by your preconceive notion. also you did directly quote me, which usually means your talking directly to said person
 

Arctic Hysteria

an abyss of Nothingness
Joined
Jun 20, 2014
Messages
655
MBTI Type
IxFP
Enneagram
4w5
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
it does, you just can't see it. you're blinded by your preconceive notion. also you did directly quote me, which usually means your talking directly to said person

Every single person who makes a post/comment about a single type with their conclusions has preconceived notion about that single type, for what happened between them and that type.
For me, I said I love the INFJs I love for reasons while recognizing their negative traits. Maybe because I've met good INFJs? Maybe because I'm INFP and I can relate? Who knows. I can only speak from my experience, and in the light of "everyone hates INFJ" I want to say I personally don't.
 

prplchknz

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 11, 2007
Messages
34,397
MBTI Type
yupp
Every single person who makes a post/comment about a single type with their conclusions has preconceived notion about that single type, for what happened between them and that type.
For me, I said I love the INFJs I love for reasons while recognizing their negative traits. Maybe because I've met good INFJs? Maybe because I'm INFP and I can relate? Who knows. I can only speak from my experience, and in the light of "everyone hates INFJ" I want to say I personally don't.

No one said "everyone hates INFJs" the original statement is "Why do others hate INFJs" others=/=everyone.
 

Hitoshi-San

New member
Joined
Jun 26, 2014
Messages
1,078
MBTI Type
esfp
Enneagram
???
Instinctual Variant
sp/so
INFJ is a rare type, the rarest of all, so chances are there are some people that just don't understand them. They're mysterious and to an extent and appear closed off or secretive, or way too idealistic at their WORST, but that is absolutely no reason to hate them. Some people are close minded idiots and can't see past any potential negatives - INFJs are often intelligent, caring, artistic, and truly interesting to get to know. Not all INFJs are the same, so it's irritating there was a generalization made against all of them.
 

Kullervo

Permabanned
Joined
May 15, 2014
Messages
3,298
MBTI Type
N/A
More reasons why INFJs piss me off:

They refuse to let you get close to them in a relationship
Passive aggressive behaviour - f*ck that
They are feminists
 

Eilonwy

Vulnerability
Joined
Oct 12, 2009
Messages
7,051
MBTI Type
INFJ
Enneagram
4
Instinctual Variant
sp/so
More reasons why INFJs piss me off:

They refuse to let you get close to them in a relationship
Passive aggressive behaviour - f*ck that
They are feminists
Finally, a list of my type's failings I can agree with.
 

Tiltyred

New member
Joined
Dec 1, 2008
Messages
4,322
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
468
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
They are feminists?
 

olivetti

New member
Joined
Aug 24, 2014
Messages
40
MBTI Type
INFJ
Enneagram
9w1
Instinctual Variant
sp/so
Lol! Actually, I can agree with some of this. Most of the time we're oblivious to it, though, and it takes someone else pointing it out to us. But we can be so dang nice (or sensitive, take your pick) that people don't often tell this to our faces.
 

á´…eparted

passages
Joined
Jan 25, 2014
Messages
8,265
Sure! Fe-mi-Ni-ists. Oh, wait. Maybe that's ENFJs, then.

Well duh, how else can we justify this:

burningbra.jpg
.

 

Bush

cute lil war dog
Joined
Nov 18, 2008
Messages
5,182
Enneagram
3w4
Instinctual Variant
sp/so
Fem in ist

= ISTx

Point destroyed
 

Dr Mobius

Biting Shards
Joined
Jul 13, 2010
Messages
873
MBTI Type
ENTP
Enneagram
7w8
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
Interesting question. The answer is as others have noted lies in the apparent rarity. Or rather all the things that come with such a state. They become a projection of the perfect woman, the rare woman who only you could capture an retain. Unfortunately the human imagination in its collective form is extremely limited, and so the traits of INFJs become entirely generic. We reduce them to the perfect standardised partner; the excellent listener, the empath who understands our needs without a word spoken (no need to develop those pesky communication skills.) The perfect feminine presence that neither emasculates nor condescends.

The pendulum swings both ways though. The other side is that of the effigy burning. When the perfect partner is found to be imperfect, when one is found to be unsufficent to the task or unwanted at all. When one masks their pain, anger, and disdain under the guise of honest and objective thought. Nothing burns quite so hot as righteous fury.

Perhaps one day we shall learn to face our inner demons without obfuscation. Hammer the axe of typology into a plow. But today, today I say let us burn a witch and rattle our cages to the spectacle.
 

Siúil a Rúin

when the colors fade
Joined
Apr 23, 2007
Messages
14,037
MBTI Type
ISFP
Enneagram
496
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
It does happen online and it used to hurt me quite a bit, but I've managed to calibrate to it and find it a bit funny. Other types love to tell you who you are and that you are oblivious to yourself and never listen to anything you say. I know plenty of pitfalls with the type, but they don't tend to be widely guilty of a lot of what people say here. Everyone obsesses on "Fe" and the idea of "J". INFJs are not everyone's ex's and we aren't narcissists. Ni-doms do have an inclination to have bizarre inner constructs about reality that are free from normative thinking, so their truth values tend to be hit or miss. They internalize the biggest picture possible of reality, so it is easily prone to distortion because it is beyond comprehension. Ni also internalizes too much, so it can attribute significance where it isn't. Ti and Fi can dismiss relevant information that doesn't fit with their inner construct. INFJs can be distant in a lot of relationships, and there can be moments of unpredictability because of some likely inner complexities, but the type is both rare and highly individualistic, so all these generalizations that people make tend to be mixed up projections of their own personal lives. All of the introverted types tend to be individualistic and resistant to generalizations, although Si has a little more potential to be normative because it is based on individual experience which can be culturally shared.

I tend to feel even more misunderstood online than irl, and yet I keep coming back. Ha. I think it is because I lurve me my evil INFJs cohorts. *smooooch* :wubbie: :hug:
 

Siúil a Rúin

when the colors fade
Joined
Apr 23, 2007
Messages
14,037
MBTI Type
ISFP
Enneagram
496
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
Also people hate what they fear, and they fear what they don't understand.

If you "hate" INFJs, try something new and listen.

Edit: Part of the reason I sound persnickety about it is because of this weird history. The biggest reason it used to hurt me is because of my own personal life and context in which I've seen family members and friends who are introverted Feeler types (including more than just INFJ) be subjected to that exact dynamic. In relationships it is extremely common for one person to be causing harm (in my experience they have been INTPs, INTJs, ISTPs, and one INFP) and then projecting those exact faults onto their partner (my experience these were INFJ, ISFJ, INFP, and ISFP). It feels like that is what is happening online. The INFJs here are really awesome people that I've been friends with, so when I see people projecting these extreme faults they found in their own exes and projecting them in insistent and rude ways on the INFJs here who often respond by being very accommodating, then I can get really angry about it. When I push back and say the criticizer are wrong in this context about the INFJs here, it is the correct position (I rarely have certitude, but in this case, I do). It does need to stop, and it isn't unreasonable to ask that people listen to INFJ (or any other type) describe their self-awareness which should include both positive and negative tendencies.
 

Amalie Muller

New member
Joined
Jun 3, 2014
Messages
119
MBTI Type
ENTP
I saw an INFJ hate group earlier today and I really don't understand why people seem to really hate us. They said they saw us as fakes and we aren't we are real genuine people. Other types feel free to give your opinion on why you like or dislike us.

Two reasons...

1) They cook and eat their own babies. Well, most of the time.

2) They pray to Akhalzekaa, the great lizard in the skies. This strange religion teaches that giving is better than receiving, we should be friendly and kind to others, and that all the knowledge you really need is already inside you, and you must look within to find it.

Which is, of course, EVil. With a capital "E"! And "V".
 

Bush

cute lil war dog
Joined
Nov 18, 2008
Messages
5,182
Enneagram
3w4
Instinctual Variant
sp/so
Also people hate what they fear, and they fear what they don't understand.
Yes. There's a hilarious visceral backlash to a single set of two letters.

Fe. Fe.

:overreact:
When I push back and say the criticizer are wrong in this context about the INFJs here, it is the correct position (I rarely have certitude, but in this case, I do). It does need to stop, and it isn't unreasonable to ask that people listen to INFJ (or any other type) describe their self-awareness which should include both positive and negative tendencies.
This. People should take most of their understanding from the horse's mouth, for God's sake. One knows their own perspective and experiences more so than anyone else does.

Not that 'hatred' is always undeserved and that we all ought to hold hands around a campfire, but.. let's not immediately jump to the polar opposite.
 

Amalie Muller

New member
Joined
Jun 3, 2014
Messages
119
MBTI Type
ENTP
Yes. There's a hilarious visceral backlash to a single set of two letters.

Fe. Fe.

:overreact:

This. People should take most of their understanding from the horse's mouth, for God's sake. One knows their own perspective and experiences more so than anyone else does.

Not that 'hatred' is always undeserved and that we all ought to hold hands around a campfire, but.. let's not immediately jump to the polar opposite.

I don't know... There is a value to hatred. It could give you that little bit extra you need to survive the imminent zombie apocalypse. So practicing hatred now, could be a real payoff later. I've already started hating Jews, Muslims, Christians, gingers, brunettes, salesmen, INFJs, INTJs, ice cream van drivers, ship captains and white-painted fences this week.
 
Top