I personally remember reading a paragraph from the book: The Spiritual Dimension of the Enneagram: Nine Faces of the Soul
And I it hit me like a ton of bricks.
...One parent may have been a stern authority figure, demanding absolute obedience and permanently intimidating the young Six. Regardless of the actual parents' reality, these were the factors focused upon and left as imprints because of the Six' sensitivity to Holy Faith and Holy Strength. The "interpretation" made by the child developing consciousness was that one or both parents or the environment as a whole, couldn't be consistently depended upon to fill his/her needs. Which feels life-threatening to at totally dependent infant and young child. The soul then becomes and remains fixed around survival anxiety and the fear of physical death. The inability and helplessness to meet his/her own needs, coupled with a seemingly undependable other, become the imprint, and form the core of the sense of self of this ennea-type.
The impression that I got was that we develop our outlook towards the world as babies. And it's based on the relationship with our mothers.
For example if a child is a 2, they react to their mother "leaving them" -which can be defined as not being next to them, not feeding them right away, not caring for them right away when they cry, etc - by thinking that their mothers needs are above their own.....
For me as a 6, I know that the reason I'm a 6 is cause I would be cared for, but when the nurturing stopped...like I said even to do something small, like my mom could have just been taking care of her own needs...something in me perceived that her "leaving me" was a sign that I could not trust anyone. And I would not want to be cared for, because if I was cared for, there is always that threat of it going away. So I tried to protect myself from abandonment or rejection, by refusing any nurturing.
I still don't like getting help from anyone to this day.
IMO we don't control that at all. That is nature. So are wings.
Tritype is nurture. And of course we can develop after a certain amount of consciousness naturally occurs. But I still think we are born the way we are and grow over time.
Instincts are also nature. Developed later in time, maybe. But I believe they're called instincts for a reason.