INFJ: I'm a vegan and the illuminati exists. You can do anything you want to me by the way.
ENFJ: I'M ENTHUSIASTIC!! PEOPLE!! LOVE!!
ENFP: I live in a sparkly magical world that looks like my little pony. In my world I already have an ideal version of what my relationships should look like. This is more of a casting call than a date.
INFP: I like to cosplay and I'm really weird and I don't even live in the same dimension as you. But I'm really kinky. Also I want to be a kindergarten teacher.
ISTJ: I'm basically a robot. Are you impressed with how clean I am?
ESTJ: Would you like to clean stuff for our date? By the way I'm an asshole.
ISFJ: I like to have fun - within the confines of rules. Please no jay walking.
ESFJ: My whole life is my family and my many jobs. I care too much about social status and birthdays.
ESTP: Lets make this date quick I got another date in an hour.
ISTP: I like you today but I don't know about later. I'm more secretive than a spy organization good luck trying to understand me.
ESFP: I like travel, music, dancing, selfies. I'm basically a variation of miley cyrus.
ISFP: I like art, photography, writing, fashion, game of thrones, food. I have no marketable skills that actually make money so please make more money than me.
INTP: Do you like sonic the hedgehog?
ENTP: Do you like magic? What about arguing?
INTJ: I am a prominent member of many internet forums. Also SCIENCE.
ENTJ: I am ambitious and I have many plans for the future. I probably make more money than you.
edit: changed the enfp one