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  1. #11
    darkened dreams labyrinthine's Avatar
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    I can get rather overwhelmed by external cues. If they fall along certain deep mental fault lines I feel more than I can bear. I long to connect and have someone show compassion and understanding, but I will more often flee to be alone so no one can see it. The vulnerability of needing to connect is what drives me to be alone when I am beyond processing further rejection.
    Step into my metaphysical room of mirrors.
    Fear of reality creates myopic morality
    So I guess it means there is trouble until the robins come
    (from Blue Velvet)

  2. #12
    can't handcuff the wind Z Buck McFate's Avatar
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    In previous threads it’s been a somewhat regular occurrence for INFJs to represent the Fe pov, if only because we’re the only ones to show up for the discussion. So I am curious about where Fe doms- especially FeSi- stand on this.

    There has been a common denominator established in the forum (at least, for NiFe) of needing to process feelings aloud to others primarily to assess how reasonable those feelings are. It’s like a means of keeping oneself in check, to make sure my own anger (or sadness, whatever) is there for the reason I think it is. Or that I'm at least in the correct ballpark. I personally am rarely in a hurry to figure out exactly what I’m feeling- but I am usually in a hurry to know why it’s there, whether the negative emotional charge behind it really is because of what I initially think it is. I believe this is so that I can know how to interact with what I believe to be the source of my discomfort in a fair manner.

    I love this quote by Naranjo: “The superimposition of past on present is linked to persons and desires from the past which are not conscious for the subject and that give his or her conduct an irrational seal- the affect does not seem appropriate either in quality or quantity to the real, actual situation.” When I’m feeling any negative emotional charge, it becomes a priority to figure out if I'm assigning an appropriate source. This isn't about figuring out 'who to blame'- this is about figuring out if I'm angry/sad/whatever for the reason I think I am.

    And really- that’s the only part I need feedback on, specifically the ‘why’. I don’t really need to work through anything aloud to figure out what I’m feeling. It's not that the 'what' isn't important, but I feel like I have lots of time to figure that out on my own- my priority is making sure I'm being fair and I can't really start working on the 'what' until the anxiety of 'why' has been taken care of. [It seems to me like FiPe/PeFi works in the opposite direction, that they feel anxiety until the 'what' has been relatively figured out?]
    Reality is a collective hunch. -Lily Tomlin

    5w4 sx/sp Johari / Nohari

  3. #13
    Honeyed Water thoughtlost's Avatar
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    Idk.

    Lately, I have been having strong feelings of guilt (actually, my roommate points this outs =P). Inadequacy, I guess. I notice it more when I am around people I fear I've let down or can't measure up to. It's definitely why I hate it when I think people have standards that I don't think I can meet (sort of like molding myself to match the other person, but I am afraid that I won't be able to do that successfully, or I do try and I still feel belittled). Anyway, I try to work it out by ...hiding or apologizing profusely ...but mostly hiding =P
    You are so arbitrary.

  4. #14
    Senior Member yeghor's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by thoughtlost View Post
    Idk.

    Lately, I have been having strong feelings of guilt (actually, my roommate points this outs =P). Inadequacy, I guess. I notice it more when I am around people I fear I've let down or can't measure up to. It's definitely why I hate it when I think people have standards that I don't think I can meet (sort of like molding myself to match the other person, but I am afraid that I won't be able to do that successfully, or I do try and I still feel belittled). Anyway, I try to work it out by ...hiding or apologizing profusely ...but mostly hiding =P
    Your avatar reminded me of @prplchknz's former avatar...?

  5. #15
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    Sorry for being a naysayer F, but I can't relate to this emotional stuff at all.

    I virtually never feel negative emotions to the point that I have to vent out. Emotions are signals for something. Best for me to process 'em and move on.

  6. #16
    girl with a pretty smile Honor's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Showbread View Post
    Does anyone else, maybe F types in particular just feel like they get snowballed with emotions? When I hear something that makes me upset I just get overcome with a gross feeling that I then have to unpack layer by layer, usually by verbalizing it to someone else.
    If I don't verbally process and unpack I just feel like I'm going to explode.

    Is this a human thing? An "F" type thing? Or an Fe thing?
    Yes. I'm like this all the time about everything.
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  7. #17
    Senior Member prplchknz's Avatar
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    wait a second, I was on this thread earlier and I could've sworn it was 8 pages. and now it's 2. what happened to the other 6 pages?
    In no likes experiment.

    that is all

    i dunno what else to say so

  8. #18
    i love skylights's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Showbread View Post
    Does anyone else, maybe F types in particular just feel like they get snowballed with emotions? When I hear something that makes me upset I just get overcome with a gross feeling
    To this part, yeah, totally, all the time. If it's a distant issue from me I can mediate it well enough and just be like "oh that sucks" and not go into it too deep and feel it too viscerally. If it's something very close I might become overwhelmed with emotion for a short period of time. I think this is an F thing.

    I then have to unpack layer by layer, usually by verbalizing it to someone else.
    If I don't verbally process and unpack I just feel like I'm going to explode.
    This happens to me with situations I haven't fully figured out that are particularly disturbing to me, and then I have to go like you said, layer by layer, to try to get at whatever I'm "missing" and don't understand.

  9. #19
    Rainy Day Woman MDP2525's Avatar
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    My ENFP has a difficult time watching TV shows or documentaries that he considers depressing or sad. Bad things happening to people (struggles) even if there is a bigger picture of courage, etc. Mainly, those things are elements of humanity and sometimes I find visiting those things in motion picture/informative form to be fascinating rather than draining.

    I don't "feel" what I watch. He does.

    Same for real life situations. It just really affects him.

    Only *once* have I felt an internal...vibration of disgust/immense weight of sadness. It was upon reading about genocide and detailed acts committed in the words of guerrilla leaders. They took pleasure in their actions and I just thought about those acts and put myself as a witness to it. The feeling shocked me. I stopped and wondered at it because it was so foreign. So if that is how F's process emotions all the time - getting hit with a wall of emotion like that - holy crap that is intense.

    I guess most times my thought and emotions aren't connected directly. I have to intentionally concentrate and "go there".
    ~luck favors the ready~


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  10. #20
    I could do things Hard's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MDP2525 View Post
    My ENFP has a difficult time watching TV shows or documentaries that he considers depressing or sad. Bad things happening to people (struggles) even if there is a bigger picture of courage, etc.
    This is a huge reason why I am not a movie person; I relate to him.

    When I watch movies I will get wrapped up in it, and my emotions will go on a roller coaster if I don't know what is going to happen. Most movies I see for the first time I will flat out refuse to watch without reading the entire plot beforehand. It pissed my friend off A LOT when I did that last year, they just couldn't fathom it claiming I'd ruin the movie. Yeah, but I don't care. I didn't want to watch it in the first place. Knowing what is going to happen can soften the blow. Movies where there is constant stress, people being forced to make nasty decisions, or are just filled with discomfort can be so stressful. I have gotten way better and can learn to detach in some situations, mostly by not watching "i.e. staring at the wall thinking of something else". But I can't always. Movies get to me more than anything because of how much focus is placed on objects, people, sounds, lights etc. I can't choose on what to focus on. I am forced to see and react in a way they want the viewer to. They are attempting to incite an emotional response. Even if I CAN ignore it, it takes a lot of mental energy.

    One of the worst experiences I ever had was seeing the first hunger games when it came out. I didn't want to see it, at all, I KNEW it would mess me up from reading the plot. But, circumstances were such that I couldn't avoid it. Long story short, the movie triggered a depressive episode that lasted about a month. For a few days after the movie, I could barely eat or leave the house I was so distraught. The sheer premise of the movie is distubing. Kids fighting to the death? Their society is forced to deal, and many like it? NO. It also hit way too close to home with worries (at the time) I couldn't let go of regarding the state of the world. It was horrible. I mean, the movie is great, but it fucked me up so much. I felt every stress the characters felt, the entire world just screamed "WRONG" at me over and over and over and I could do nothing to stop it, yet it was realistic enough to be a valid future scenario.

    So yeah, I don't like movies, or TV shows, or anything else that incites responses like this. I'll pass.
    MBTI: ExxJ tetramer
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