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  1. #1
    Senior Member The Great One's Avatar
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    Default Fi vs. Ti and active listening skills

    So according to mbti expert Dario Nardi, Fi users are amazing at active listening and Ti users basically suck at it. Do you think that this is accurate? I'm personally a Ti user and I can tell you right now that I suck at active listening. What do the rest of you have to say about this?

  2. #2
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    This is something that has interested me as well. Speaking primarily from personal experience I would say Fi users have the capacity for active listening but not necessarily the desire (probably Te's influence seeking to resolve the problem instead) whilst Ti users have a poor capacity but an automatic (if sometimes clumsy) desire to due to Fe. However in the end Ti users would seek to analyze the incoming data whilst Fi users would seek to evaluate it. In both cases the process would occupy the conscious mind and distract towards mere hearing.

    I need to take another look at Nardi's work I think.

  3. #3
    Stansmith
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    I suck at listening and I'm a Fi user

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    Senior Member The Great One's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Standuble View Post
    This is something that has interested me as well. Speaking primarily from personal experience I would say Fi users have the capacity for active listening but not necessarily the desire (probably Te's influence seeking to resolve the problem instead) whilst Ti users have a poor capacity but an automatic (if sometimes clumsy) desire to due to Fe. However in the end Ti users would seek to analyze the incoming data whilst Fi users would seek to evaluate it. In both cases the process would occupy the conscious mind and distract towards mere hearing.

    I need to take another look at Nardi's work I think.
    Yeah, but supposedly the Fi users will be more attentive to listening because they relate everything back to themselves. I know that I don't. Personally, like you just said, I basically just analyze everything and it distracts me from listening.

    Quote Originally Posted by Stansmith View Post
    I suck at listening and I'm a Fi user
    Sorry I actually meant xxFP types not tertiary Fi users. I should have clarified.

  5. #5
    Away with the fairies Southern Kross's Avatar
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    I do think Fi users are good at this because we're constantly trying to unlock the meaning behind things. In this sense we're not just hearing the words, our brains are highly and directly engaged with the content. I often approach people and the things they say like they're a puzzle or riddle that I'm trying to decipher.

    However, I don't think this means we always listen well, though. At times someone will say something to me that will spark a thought or distract me in some way and then I can end up more engaged in the tangential thinking than the immediate conversation. Both Se and Ne can interrupt that Fi attentiveness.

    I don't think that Ti users intend to be bad listeners, or that they're lazy in that regard (just as I don't think Fi does it to be virtuous), but the often don't seem as invested in a conversation. It can be like they're sitting back and watching a sports match; they're taking it in and may be interested in the goings on, but they're not all that personally wrapped up in what happens or who wins. I think Ti values impartiality and personal separation from a system. Ti-users like to set things in motion and just see how things play out. They might encourage things along the way, but they'll leave the personal conclusions to afterwards. Would you agree @The Great One?
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  6. #6
    You have a choice! 21%'s Avatar
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    I don't think any function makes anyone a better listener in terms of skills. Most of the time it depends on the individual and how invested they are in the conversation. However, I think other functions will most likely try to 'fix' the situation, and that can get in the way of listening. Ti-users like to summarize the situation and find a principle to apply to it to solve the problem, and Fe-users will try to make you feel better by making suggestions of what you can do to eliminate the conflict. In my experience, Fi doesn't really do theses things, so it gives people the assurance that they are really being heard.

    My ISFP friend is the greatest listener ever -- very patient and kind and non-judgmental.
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  7. #7
    Away with the fairies Southern Kross's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by 21% View Post
    I don't think any function makes anyone a better listener in terms of skills. Most of the time it depends on the individual and how invested they are in the conversation. However, I think other functions will most likely try to 'fix' the situation, and that can get in the way of listening. Ti-users like to summarize the situation and find a principle to apply to it to solve the problem, and Fe-users will try to make you feel better by making suggestions of what you can do to eliminate the conflict. In my experience, Fi doesn't really do theses things, so it gives people the assurance that they are really being heard.

    My ISFP friend is the greatest listener ever -- very patient and kind and non-judgmental.
    I don't think it necessarily makes Fi users more sympathetic and supportive listeners - I don't know that this is a function related factor. From what I remember Nardi said that, when listening, specific parts of a Fi users' brain light up in a way that suggests their brain is highly engaged. But Nardi also said only 2 (I think?) types use the logic centres of the brain, while all other types use other sections to make do. This doesn't mean that only 2 types are 'logical' - it just means that for most types, logical thinking is achieved through other, more unexpectedly indirect, methods.

    But perhaps you are right that more engagement may lead to more patient listening.
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  9. #9
    morose bourgeoisie
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    Why would Fi users be good at listening? ? What is the relationship?

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    Senior Member The Great One's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Southern Kross View Post
    I do think Fi users are good at this because we're constantly trying to unlock the meaning behind things. In this sense we're not just hearing the words, our brains are highly and directly engaged with the content. I often approach people and the things they say like they're a puzzle or riddle that I'm trying to decipher.

    However, I don't think this means we always listen well, though. At times someone will say something to me that will spark a thought or distract me in some way and then I can end up more engaged in the tangential thinking than the immediate conversation. Both Se and Ne can interrupt that Fi attentiveness.

    I don't think that Ti users intend to be bad listeners, or that they're lazy in that regard (just as I don't think Fi does it to be virtuous), but the often don't seem as invested in a conversation. It can be like they're sitting back and watching a sports match; they're taking it in and may be interested in the goings on, but they're not all that personally wrapped up in what happens or who wins. I think Ti values impartiality and personal separation from a system. Ti-users like to set things in motion and just see how things play out. They might encourage things along the way, but they'll leave the personal conclusions to afterwards. Would you agree The Great One?
    I'm not really sure if I agree with the Ti part. I think that Ti users who have not yet developed Fe can be very impersonal, however once you develop strong Fe you tend to be much more emotionally attached to the conversation. Personally, I believe that the reason that I suck at listening is that when a person starts talking about something, my mind instantly trails off and starts analyzing the hell out of situation and this distracts me from the conversation altogether.

    Quote Originally Posted by Stanton Moore View Post
    Why would Fi users be good at listening? ? What is the relationship?
    @Elfboy

    Can you explain this to him? You explained it so much better than I the other day on the phone.

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