+ I know you're going to ask me to elaborate, so let me explain why. It just struck me in this post that you seem dissatisfied by the lack of feeling like your life is currently infused with spiritual purpose/deeper meaning. It also seems like the connections you have with people right now aren't profound or inspiring you in any way.
Also, being aware of why you are dissatisfied does not mean that you are self-indulgent or whining. Seems like you can't become a satisfied person without figuring out why you're dissatisfied and how to be satisfied!