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  1. #1
    girl with a pretty smile Honor's Avatar
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    Default I/E and Ideal Number of Friends

    This probably seems like an obvious question, but it may prove interesting anyway.

    How many close friends do you have? How many would you have in your ideal circumstances? By close friend, I mean someone who you regularly involve in your life and/or someone who you inform of the major events of your life. Include family members that you are willingly close to.

  2. #2

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    Over one hundred maybe. Ideally everyone would be a friend.

  3. #3
    Let me count the ways Betty Blue's Avatar
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    I actually have hardly any close friends that i see often. When i say often i mean more than once every couple of weeks. I have several...maybe three or four that i see at least once a month (usually) but i have a vast array of deep connections with many people that i see only occaisionally. I don't have a group of friends to speak of.
    "We knew he was someone who had a tragic flaw, that's where his greatness came from"

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    Senior Member pinkgraffiti's Avatar
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    this is a bit of a weird question, but if i had to take a wild guess i'd say about 20?!?

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    girl with a pretty smile Honor's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by wolfy View Post
    Over one hundred maybe. Ideally everyone would be a friend.
    lol, I feel the same way too.

    Quote Originally Posted by HelenOfTroy View Post
    I actually have hardly any close friends that i see often. When i say often i mean more than once every couple of weeks. I have several...maybe three or four that i see at least once a month (usually) but i have a vast array of deep connections with many people that i see only occaisionally. I don't have a group of friends to speak of.
    Wow, I think it's interesting (and awesome) that you feel deeply connected to people you don't see often.

  6. #6
    girl with a pretty smile Honor's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by pinkgraffiti View Post
    this is a bit of a weird question, but if i had to take a wild guess i'd say about 20?!?
    Sounds like a good number to me. Do you mean it's a hard question to answer?

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    Senior Member pinkgraffiti's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Honor View Post
    Sounds like a good number to me. Do you mean it's a hard question to answer?
    it's just very difficult (at least for me) to understand what exactly close friends are. it's not easy to classify people like that. constant contact is not a good way to think about it, because i'm often most in contact with acquaintances, ie. people i go out with weekly, than with my best friends, who are often in different cities/countries and who I might contact every few months or even years. so i'm trying to think of the people that are significant to me, emotionally, and i guess that would be around 20, maybe more, i'd have to write a list. it's just a weird concept for me to analyse.

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    girl with a pretty smile Honor's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by pinkgraffiti View Post
    it's just very difficult (at least for me) to understand what exactly close friends are. it's not easy to classify people like that. constant contact is not a good way to think about it, because i'm often most in contact with acquaintances, ie. people i go out with weekly, than with my best friends, who are often in different cities/countries and who I might contact every few months or even years. so i'm trying to think of the people that are significant to me, emotionally, and i guess that would be around 20, maybe more, i'd have to write a list. it's just a weird concept for me to analyse.
    Hmm, it's interesting that you and another ENFP on this thread said similar things. The reason I phrased the original post that way is because I find my attention (and therefore, attachments) shift to whoever I am interacting with the most. And also, perhaps it's an extrovert thing to engage people who you don't have strong connections with...I don't do much of that myself.

  9. #9
    Senior Member pinkgraffiti's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Honor View Post
    Hmm, it's interesting that you and another ENFP on this thread said similar things. The reason I phrased the original post that way is because I find my attention (and therefore, attachments) shift to whoever I am interacting with the most. And also, perhaps it's an extrovert thing to engage people who you don't have strong connections with...I don't do much of that myself.
    the important people in my life are a secure fact and i don't need to see them often to appreciate them.
    when i want to go out etc i want to have fun and often for me it's more important the event than the act of seeing my friends. i mean, if i want to go to a concert, then i'll call a friend that i know has similar tastes etc, but my main goal is to see concert (with company) not to see him/her (i enjoy their company though of course).

    once in a while maybe i need a good conversation with a good friend, but this may be every two weeks or one month and i have a circle of good friends, so they switch.
    i don't know. it just is that i don't need to see close friends often in order to keep that feeling of closeness. they know i like them and i know they like me. knowing they're ok is the most important thing.

  10. #10
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    I would consider my immediate family close friends, so that is 7, with SOs, that is 10. I have many close friends who have moved away to other parts of the country/world. They are very dear to me, but I hardly see them.

    In my physical proximity ideally I would like at least 5-10 close friends. But I like to have many friendly acquaintances.
    Your kisses, sweeter than honey. But guess what, so is my money.

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