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  1. #151
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    I actually fail to see the problem here. She asked you to throw a bowl away and you claim you felt pain and resentment and stopped talking to her?

    What I want to know is where YOUR sense of entitlement comes from.

    I haven't read the whole thread, so I'm not sure anyone else sees this as absurd as I see it.

  2. #152
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    Quote Originally Posted by DJ Arendee View Post
    I've known this girl for 5 months then she pulls this crap out of NOWHERE. I wasn't expecting it.
    She asked you to throw something away.

    Is this like some kind of first world problem that upper middle class people whose parents never made them do chores has?

    What. in. the. hell.

  3. #153
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    Quote Originally Posted by DJ Arendee View Post
    Here we go again with the NFP's telling me I'm a sociopathic narcissist again. lmao. I think you need to leave the house.

    I am entitled to reject whomever I choose from my life. I'm not in a begging position to make friends, as I have quite a lot. So if she treats me like her servant, I cut her from my life and meet someone who won't. If that's narcissism then... sure I guess I'm a narcissist. haha.

    I shouldn't have to include people in my life who upset me just to prove that I'm not a narcissist, lmao.
    Honestly, last post I'm gonna make...but I think you may be a narcissist. I'm not sure how asking you something semi-rudely ONE TIME in an entire five month friendship warrants you feeling "pain" and not speaking to someone with the intention of never speaking to them again.

    If anything, I actually think she should run from you. Run far. FAR.

    I swear, even if her tone was the slightest bit nasty or something, doing something like this one time in a five month friendship does not warrant your theatrical, exaggerated, sense-of-entitlement response.

    This entire thread is a joke to me.

    Her: *munches salad* "Throw this bowl away for me, would ya?"

    You: *stomps away, cries, vows to never speak to her again, and shrieks about deserved apology to Type C forum*

    What you could have done: "Can't you throw it away yourself?" OR "You said that a little rudely." OR "Sure, let me get that for you, attractive woman who has been my friend for the past five months."

  4. #154
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    Quote Originally Posted by DJ Arendee View Post
    I don't really have anything to get angry over anymore except how much the navy sucks. I might make a video about that.

    I don't know if I was responsible, but my room mate's wife had a miscarriage 2 months after I warcried at her, and she told the cops I was going to murder her.

    She deserved it. She treated me like a guest in my own home and would complain if she heard any tinkling of silverware and would tell me to "please quiet down."
    I really thought that was my last post, but no.

    You're an abuser.

    Your response is one of an abuser, too. Wildly exaggerated with entitlement. Like you said you could clench your teeth in her face aggressively and smash her phone, and now you say you screamed at this pregnant woman because she asked you to be quiet and she called the cops...

    But you deserve an apology because she asked you to throw a salad bowl away.

    This is the line of thinking a lot of people who commit domestic violence have. I think you definitely have some sort of personality disorder, and just know I don't mean that I think you'll be the next Hitler or that that's scary or cool in any way.

  5. #155
    Senior Member Nicodemus's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DJ Arendee View Post
    I don't know if I was responsible, but my room mate's wife had a miscarriage 2 months after I warcried at her, and she told the cops I was going to murder her.

    She deserved it. She treated me like a guest in my own home and would complain if she heard any tinkling of silverware and would tell me to "please quiet down."
    Talk about the punishment matching the crime...

    Quote Originally Posted by Marmotini View Post
    This is the line of thinking a lot of people who commit domestic violence have. I think you definitely have some sort of personality disorder, and just know I don't mean that I think you'll be the next Hitler or that that's scary or cool in any way.
    Right back into old habits.

    Love it!

  6. #156
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    Quote Originally Posted by Nicodemus View Post
    Talk about the punishment matching the crime...


    Right back into old habits.

    Love it!
    Whatever, it's not old habits. If someone in this man's real life won't tell him that he's dangerous, some one on the Internet should. His pattern of behavior all points to domestic violence: smashing phones because someone messes with his music, screaming in people's faces because they ask him to please be quiet, having the cops called on him, overreacting to something very minor (he only says later that he cussed at her et al at the scene, and yet he still insists he deserves an apology).

    I guess you think it's more amusing to enable him, but I don't.

  7. #157
    Senior Member Nicodemus's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Marmotini View Post
    Whatever, it's not old habits. If someone in this man's real life won't tell him that he's dangerous, some one on the Internet should. His pattern of behavior all points to domestic violence: smashing phones because someone messes with his music, screaming in people's faces because they ask him to please be quiet, having the cops called on him, overreacting to something very minor (he only says later that he cussed at her et al at the scene, and yet he still insists he deserves an apology).
    Tendentially, I agree with everything except the first sentence.

  8. #158
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    Quote Originally Posted by Nicodemus View Post
    Tendentially, I agree with everything except the first sentence.
    Then I take it to mean that you think "telling the truth" is some kind of dirty habit.

  9. #159
    ^He pronks, too! Magic Poriferan's Avatar
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    Pssst... A period ends the sentence.
    Go to sleep, iguana.


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  10. #160
    Analytical Dreamer Coriolis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DJ Arendee View Post
    I think I only expect apologies as an ultimatum. Either you apologize or I stop talking to you and move on. And so I'd like to learn if its acceptable to take her sad face and ingratiating tone as enough of an apology. When people hurt me, I delete them from my life unless they apologize. That's just how I am.
    There are many ways to apologize. What is important to you in an apology? Only you can decide whether what she has done is acceptable. There is no universal standard.

    Quote Originally Posted by skylights View Post
    To be fair, expecting/demanding an apology is basically forcing another person to lower their ego for your sake. I understand that it's also an acknowledgement and reparation for hurt, and I too have expected/demanded apologies to continue relationships, but in a perfect world, we shouldn't need apologies from others.
    Yes. The most I will insist on is that the other person understand as fully as possible the impact of their actions on me. Ideally, they will also give me an explanation for why they acted as they did. Expressions of remorse are OK as long as they are genuine, but are incidental to the more important content.

    Quote Originally Posted by DJ Arendee View Post
    Check out my previous response. Its not so much that I, Fe user, need someone to apologize because "that's what people do when they mess up," so much as it is an objective and visible expression of remorse. This tells me that the person wants to make amends instead of maintain the position of being right. This is also by no means a one sided thing. I feel like I am one of the few people on this earth who apologizes for what he does wrong, and there is nothing in my ego that says I need to be right in the context of a relationship with another person.
    The highlighted sounds like your personal standard for an apology. Does this lady's "sad face and ingratiating tone" indicate to you that she wants to make amends? Note that a desire to make amends can be present without an understanding of how one has given offense, but without that understanding reconciliation is more difficult.

    Quote Originally Posted by skylights View Post
    That's interesting. Why do you think sympathy is usually empty? I think it's usually well-intended, even if it's not always completely understood.
    What do you think sympathy usually contains? Intent is no substitute for substance. To me, it usually comes across as just empty pro-forma words that have no real consequence.

    Quote Originally Posted by SolitaryWalker View Post
    I am an INTP, so does that mean I never use Fi? E is not part of my four letter MBTI code, so does that mean that whatever holds true about extroverts does not hold true about me?
    Theories differ on how to interpret this. Some say you use Fi, but poorly and with little conscious control. As an INTP, you would tend to use T(i) for internal judgment, and Fe rather than Fi for values. The highlighted is false and an overgeneralization. You will have certain things in common with some extraverts but not with others, just as with other introverts.
    I've been called a criminal, a terrorist, and a threat to the known universe. But everything you were told is a lie. The truth is, they've taken our freedom, our home, and our future. The time has come for all humanity to take a stand...

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