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Thread: Fe put-downs

  1. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by Giggly View Post
    A lot of those things sound like something that people who subscribe to traditional gender roles and stereotypes say, which is not a type thing or cognitive function thing.
    Not sure if I agree...

    I think heavy Si users (SJs) tend to subscribe to traditional gender roles and stereotypes more readily...

    I actually think Si and Fe probably have the strongest "behavior-conformity" bents, and, as such, ESFJs are the type most prone to making "behavior-conforming" judgments (my mom is an ESFJ, and she's totally like this -- it shocks me whenever she does it [I can't believe she can honestly have that sentiment and not find it absurd]; my ex's mom is an ESFJ, and she was totally like this; and this pretty much fits the general ESFJ description).

    Quote Originally Posted by Southern Kross View Post
    I don't know if it's Fe related. Just last night I was watching two ESTJs trade insults over several hours over what each were wearing. Although in this context it was meant as friendly ribbing and no real offence was meant.
    ...which brings me to this point, which I largely agree with, as I've seen many people that believe, and I've seen it firsthand myself, that ESTJs often have a very strong "behavior-conformity" bent (and find it odd, since ESTJs aren't regular Fe-users). I would, as I pointed to above, though, say it has to do with Si beliefs about what is appropriate/proper/acceptable and what is not. They're also inferior Fi, so it's not like they have as strong/conscious an inclination as FPs (and even many INTJs [because of dominant Si, ISTJs tend to have a more similar "behavior-conformity" vibe]) to react strongly against behaviors that offend/attempt to suppress the individual (Fi) nature of a human being.

    Quote Originally Posted by highlander View Post
    On this Fe put down thing - It's a subtle put down that you are not acting in an "appropriate" way. They apply judgment to your behaviors and make you feel like you are an idiot for being the way you are. Why aren't you like other people? It can be quite undermining. Who says the social norms or what is in their head is right? That's the problem because frequently they are not right. It's a failure to appreciate individuality.
    Fixed.

    That's what they try to do.

    But they can go fuck themselves.

  2. #22
    Administrator highlander's Avatar
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    One example I can come up with is that you say something in a conversation and afterwards the Fe'er criticizes you for saying what you said - this one little thing - the apparent social atrocity. You're like - I was just making conversation and it was an offhand comment - what's the big deal? The Fe'er then expands this single instance into a broader overall criticism of your social skills or how you act in a broader way.

    Another example is to judge a person in a negative light because that person is not like other people. There is a failure to recognize what is unique and special about that person and to appreciate those things. All that is noticed is how they are different and it is wrong.

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  3. #23
    The High Priestess Amargith's Avatar
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    Damn, tertiary Fi is on a roll these days
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  4. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by highlander View Post
    One example I can come up with is that you say something in a conversation and afterwards the Fe'er criticizes you for saying what you said - this one little thing - the apparent social atrocity. You're like - I was just making conversation and it was an offhand comment - what's the big deal? The Fe'er then expands this single instance into a broader overall criticism of your social skills or how you act in a broader way.

    Another example is to judge a person in a negative light because that person is not like other people. There is a failure to recognize what is unique and special about that person and to appreciate those things. All that is noticed is how they are different and it is wrong.
    :sipsteadelicately:

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    Quote Originally Posted by Amargith View Post
    I wonder if it isn't...I dunno, a form of humour? That gets experienced as a slight? I can imagine that Fe-users would find it very amusing to notice those things that are outside the realm of what is generally considered the norm in society. Granted, if it makes them feel uncomfortable, it will likely be a projection of their uncomfortableness...but Ive seen Fe-users who are comfortable in their own skin just be amused by the Fe-irony present in whatever it is the other person is doing that is outside the social norm.


    Quote Originally Posted by highlander View Post
    One example I can come up with is that you say something in a conversation and afterwards the Fe'er criticizes you for saying what you said - this one little thing - the apparent social atrocity. You're like - I was just making conversation and it was an offhand comment - what's the big deal? The Fe'er then expands this single instance into a broader overall criticism of your social skills or how you act in a broader way.
    Yes.

    You should see the fucking ENTPs in vent.



    Quote Originally Posted by highlander View Post
    Another example is to judge a person in a negative light because that person is not like other people. There is a failure to recognize what is unique and special about that person and to appreciate those things. All that is noticed is how they are different and it is wrong.
    +1 for this, and +1 for the above.

    Quote Originally Posted by Amargith View Post
    Damn, tertiary Fi is on a roll these days
    It's the deluxe version, my dear.

    We're not all afraid of our tertiary.


  6. #26
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    Clearly. Is there an upgrade still?
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    We're working on it.

  8. #28
    Senior Member the state i am in's Avatar
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    Fe is just working with layers and layers of preference structure. the good/bad balancing act that's attached to meanings rather than effects. meanings are ideas that circulate among us, that bind our communication despite its invisibleness, the general knowledge that we're always connected to because it's always happening all around us that helps us guess what the likely meaning of the actual is in a way that is, again, socially binding. sharing conditions of perception and identifying with the perceiver's goal rather than with the effects of the direct observable experience from our own perspective.

    how is this similar to Te? Te treats the meanings as if they're real things. it tries to more precisely measure the ideas. it thinks the ideas can be objectified and treated statistically, defined within proper ranges, and that thusly it is less important to rely on listening to how those meanings are performed and what they feel like when you wear them in various social spaces. again, a subtle distinction between what they feel like when you wear them in various social spaces and what YOU feel like when you wear them in various social spaces. Fe/Fi. with Fi, you're staying with your experience rather than watching how meanings territorialize that experience.

    Je is about prediction, about intention, that's simply based on previous experience in a way that is learned through performing it but not through analyzing the effects of the particular situation and your contribution to it. you learn it like you learn grammar. you're constantly mirroring and performing it, like ghost notes, even when you're not. it habituates without a reflexive process where a person might consider other ways of acting and reformulate stories to organize how emotional experiences and personal values interact.

    either way, we're the grammar police. Ni is a little different than Si in this regard in that it's maybe less immediately prescriptive, because we're more interested in seeing how a change aggregates more globally, which means we'd like a variety of interrelated contexts of the same class to blend together to see what kind of conceptual predictive model we can make (aka typology in general).

  9. #29
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    Quote Originally Posted by Zarathustra View Post


    We're working on it.

    ...I think I'll stick with the beta for now.
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  10. #30
    Administrator highlander's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Zarathustra View Post

    +1 for this, and +1 for the above.
    They can also get disproportionately upset and defensive if you make observations about them doing something insensitive or rude.

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