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What type flirts the best?

Who the best overall flirt?


  • Total voters
    91

ThatsWhatHeSaid

Well-known member
Joined
May 11, 2007
Messages
7,263
MBTI Type
INTP
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5w4
This is probably a stupid question, but I'm going to ask it anyway.

What constitutes flirting? And how is that different from simply being friendly or joking around?

When I voted, I voted on the basis of whom is more likely going to charm their interest.

That was one of the questions I wanted to discuss. What IS flirting? Obviously it's a way to court someone and induce them to form certain impressions of you in their mind. But there's a common element to all flirting. Some ideas:

Flirting creates value for the flirtor through words or actions
The words or actions signal status or available resources
The resources can be material or psychological (happiness, calmness) through humor
 

Totenkindly

@.~*virinaĉo*~.@
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Apr 19, 2007
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BELF
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Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
That was one of the questions I wanted to discuss. What IS flirting? Obviously it's a way to court someone and induce them to form certain impressions of you in their mind. But there's a common element to all flirting. Some ideas:

Flirting creates value for the flirtor through words or actions
The words or actions signal status or available resources
The resources can be material or psychological (happiness, calmness) through humor

mmm.... *twirls curl of hair innocently around pinky*

I love it when you talk like this.
 

digesthisickness

✿ڿڰۣஇღ♥ wut ♥ღஇڿڰۣ✿
Joined
Apr 24, 2007
Messages
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MBTI Type
ENTP
flirting is an action that simultaneously creates comfort and tension.

it builds attraction via pushing and pulling at the same time.
 

Nadir

Enigma
Joined
Dec 17, 2007
Messages
544
MBTI Type
INxJ
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4
Flirting =~ Carrot on a stick. You can't say the horse doesn't enjoy it -- there's always the allure of potential, sudden closure, too.

Clarification: ...The Supplement also depicts a person trying to entice a donkey to move by dangling a carrot in front of it, which represents a completely different use of the phrase because there's no punishment involved...
 

digesthisickness

✿ڿڰۣஇღ♥ wut ♥ღஇڿڰۣ✿
Joined
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teasing on its own gets tiresome after a while. eventually a smart donkey says, "fuck this".

and always getting teased with no build up or at least the idea that there could be a chance of escalation does qualify as punishment.
 

Siúil a Rúin

when the colors fade
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Apr 23, 2007
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ISFP
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sp/sx
There is one mode of flirting that is a smidge manipulative. By making a person feel accepted and praised one moment and rejected and insecure the next, it can increase their sense of attachment to the other person. Many people have certain areas where they need to feel validated, so by giving people a taste of that validation and then taking it away, they can become a little addicted to the process. Inconsistency is a primary form of manipulation keeping the other person at a disadvantage of less power.

Of course there are more innocent versions of this, and some flirting wouldn't even fit that process, but i'm just saying. Perception and intent are both factors in this. When people are equally matched in their communication style it probably helps it be just balanced and fun. Sometimes it is a display of wit to show oneself fit or whatever. It can also be a way to show interest w/o seeming too needy. In that case it can decrease the pressure on the other person which is the opposite of what i was describing earlier.
 

ajblaise

Minister of Propagandhi
Joined
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INTP
I think us NT's are pretty good at it. One of the keys to flirting is humor, and I think NT's are the best humorists. Flirting and humor seem to come from the same well, both are designed to get a positive reaction out of people.
 

animenagai

New member
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Aug 22, 2008
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NeFi
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4w3
i don't like how the poll is structured. i don't think splitting the type up into the 4 temperaments help our quest at all. take the claim that SP's are the best at flirting. ISTP's are known for spending the least effort of all the groups on a relationship. surely, they cannot be the best flirts. on the other hand, an ESFP would be one of the best. how can two types from the same temperament differ so much? the answer is that what constitutes a good flirt have little to do with whether they are a J or a P, an S or an N (okay, maybe this one has a little more truth in it) but how well they interact with people. therefore, E's and F's should make the best flirts in my book. don't get flirting prowess mixed up with what type you like yourself. we are talking about overall ability here.

the Fe function obviously has much to do with how well one can understand people, so those with a dominant Fe function should have an advantage. those are the ESFJ's and ENFJ's.
 

millerm277

New member
Joined
Feb 1, 2008
Messages
978
MBTI Type
ISTP
I'm an ISTP, and I seem to be a "natural" flirt, I don't even know what exactly it is I do, but even though I'm definitely of average or even slightly below-average looks, I'm able to attract pretty much whoever appeals to me quickly and without much effort.
 

CzeCze

RETIRED
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^^ Mr. ISTP Stud -- dood, you must write a book. And then go sell it on Maxim.com or 'AskMen.com' or some place like that. And give me 10% for suggesting the idea to you. :yes:

They cannot beat the ENFx for their ability to extrovert, mimic and understand the human element in other people to manipulate their responses. Sorry. INTP very good at being sophisticated and witty but that's not all there is to flirting.

+1 for Heart!

Annnnnnnd, I'm sorry maybe I'm not hanging out with the right INTPs but the INTPs I know who try to flirt? Mmmm....it can be endearing, let's put it that way, but it's not smooth.

But I guess you didn't say who's the 'smoothest' flirt.

I'm not even sure what you mean by flirting anymore, so nevermind.

NTs the best at flirting? Hahahaha. Good one. Maybe flirting with each other, but with other temperaments? Hell no.

Hahahahahaha. Lat, the ubiquituous 'they' have given you a bad rap. You are a-okay in my book. 'Cause that was funny.
 

Algora J

New member
Joined
Jun 5, 2008
Messages
122
ENFJ best overall flirt. Must give credit where it is due.

Agreed. Definitely ENFJ. All the ENFJ male friends I have are the biggest flirts. Can't take them anywhere without one of them picking up some woman at the next table etc. On the other hand, ESTJ men I'm friends with DO NOT FLIRT. They are always uber professional and slightly intimidating until you unravel their interests.
 

CzeCze

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On the other hand, ESTJ men I'm friends with DO NOT FLIRT. They are always uber professional and slightly intimidating until you "unravel their interests."

Wow. That sounds kinda hot.

:laugh:
 
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