I see my feelings as only an indicator that something needs to be done. In and of themselves, they are not that useful to me, because I realize they may shift with new information or time or my mood etc. When I talk to other people about my feelings, it is mostly to do a quick check that I'm not missing some kind of information that is really important or that I'm not way off base (kind of like quickly checking yourself in the mirror before you go out somewhere) and also so that I can discharge the excess emotion that is keeping me from finding some kind of usable solution. That is why having a person who will listen and ask clarifying questions without either getting overly emotional themselves or offering advice is invaluable to me. I have too many details swimming around in my head and am unsure of which ones deserve the most weight. By talking about it to someone else, I need to decide what matters enough to verbalize and that in turn helps define and clarify the problem for me.
When I talk to someone and they either want to help me through the experience themselves or they get bogged down in what their response should be or they want to just be prescriptive without invitation or hearing the details, it creates more emotional noise for me to have to deal with before I can start getting to the problem and feeling better.
I never realized this particular Fe/Fi difference about processing until coming here. It's helped me to understand that it is important then to show appreciation for Fi users when they are willing to listen patiently and also to be more specific about how they can help me without me reacting negatively.