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  1. #31
    Administrator highlander's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by AphroditeGoneAwry View Post
    Just occurred to me. I have notice my Fi dom friends do this really searching eye contact--are really intense with their eyes when looking at you, like as a major tool to understand something I am saying, or me.
    The two IxFPs that I've known very well communicate through their eyes more/better than they do verbally. Maybe that's why they look at others eyes.

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  2. #32
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    Quote Originally Posted by animenagai View Post
    Safe to say that this isn't quite the same in an online environment?
    well look at my photos...in many of them Im not smiling. My ESFJ ex used to tell me to put pics of myself smiling up (and I hate being instructed to smile, but more so by strangers, at least my ex thought I have a pretty smile). Also, the first time JTG saw a video of me (which is on this forum) he was like you're well spoken but I didnt realize that you're so reserved. And after he got to know me he typed me as ISFP. My ESFJ ex also used to call me "introvert." even other people who met me in person said things like I seemed INFJ.

    In my daily life people say Im sweet and quiet until they get me to open up.

    I mean look how expressive someone like Fireshield is here, but then says he's afraid to even talk to a girl IRL.

    I've been a performer and a writer for most of my life so of course Im comfortable acting in front of a group and then especially doing so in writing.

    My ISTP was like wow why are you so intense after knowing me for OVER A YEAR. You either have to get close to me or know me on a daily basis to get me to really show what's going on inside of me.

    The exceptions would include meeting me if I were angry or tipsy.

  3. #33
    (blankpages) Xenon's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by highlander View Post
    It's interesting. I don't agree with the "showing emotion" part though. ENFPs are the most animated types I know of and they definitely show their emotions. I think Fe tends to be much more calculating (maybe not the best word) in expressing the emotions for the effect they have on other people where as Fi types will just express how they feel irrespective of the impact it has on others.
    I was thinking along these lines too; ExFPs are often quite expressive while IxFJs tend to seem very restrained. I think it would be far more accurate to say that Fi types and Fe types are motivated to show/hide emotions for different reasons, rather than saying one is more expressive than the other. An Fe-user will choose to hide emotions if (s)he thinks displaying them is inappropriate or will have a negative effect on the group/person/social environment. (I've found myself wanting to use that same word, "calculating," to describe INFJs in particular...it seems too cold though.)

  4. #34
    failure to thrive AphroditeGoneAwry's Avatar
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    Yeah. INFJs have a 'hold back' aura about them for sure.

    But, I think for me it's more about protecting myself a bit more than being inappropriate to others, though that does factor in significantly. It's like this default instantaneous shut-down mode when you sense another is heading in a different direction than you are; I want to withdraw and wait for a time to ponder it all alone. If it's a group thing it's because I don't feel it's worth the bother, and I prefer to just go along than put energy into asserting something against the tide. If it's personal, it's to simply be alone with it>no one is allowed in. [unless they pry themselves in, and that is a whole nuther thang. ]
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  5. #35
    Senior Member Doctorjuice's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Xenon View Post
    I was thinking along these lines too; ExFPs are often quite expressive while IxFJs tend to seem very restrained. I think it would be far more accurate to say that Fi types and Fe types are motivated to show/hide emotions for different reasons, rather than saying one is more expressive than the other. An Fe-user will choose to hide emotions if (s)he thinks displaying them is inappropriate or will have a negative effect on the group/person/social environment. (I've found myself wanting to use that same word, "calculating," to describe INFJs in particular...it seems too cold though.)
    Yeah I probably should've mentioned ExFPs in the video, they are some of the most lively folks. Be careful not to confuse being energetic with very expressive and open with emotions. IxFJs are reserved, sure, but they're usually quite open and immediate in displaying their emotions.

  6. #36
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    Quote Originally Posted by Doctorjuice View Post
    Yeah I probably should've mentioned ExFPs in the video, they are some of the most lively folks. Be careful not to confuse being energetic with very expressive and open with emotions. IxFJs are reserved, sure, but they're usually quite open and immediate in displaying their emotions.
    Yes, that's what I was explaining about myself. ENFPs and ISFPs are both seen as "ambiverted" because of their energy, I think. Se is a highly "energetic" function that has nothing to do necessarily with expression of a rational Feeling function (which is why some types are so annoyed by Se doms I think, lol). Then of course being an Ne dom (as opposed to an Ne aux, who are less "energetic") would appear more energetic too.

    But an Fe dom has a completely different thing going on. I like having Fe dom friends sometimes, because they draw ME out, it takes any discomfort, reserve, etc. I feel away, like they make me feel comfortable first, so I then can open up to them.

    On the other hand, compared to some other types, I probably appear more initiating in some ways.

  7. #37
    Senior Member The Great One's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Doctorjuice View Post
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cuTtR...ature=youtu.be
    This is a video I did comparing and contrasting Fi and Fe.

    Let me know if you think this video is accurate! Do you use Fi or Fe? What are some characteristics of it? What are some characteristics that you've noticed of other people who use Fi and Fe?

    Feedback and critique are welcome!

    Other videos:

    Introverted vs Extraverts: Explained:
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bXBFnqu8VxE
    So if I posted a video of myself on this forum, do you think you could diagnose me as an Fe or Fi user based on my facial expressions?

  8. #38
    Administrator highlander's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Doctorjuice View Post
    Fe users show their emotions almost immediately and are a bit more open book. If they don't want to show you their emotions they're going to have a tougher time doing
    I agree with a lot of what you say in this thread but this part is simply not right. Try figuring out an ISFJ's emotions some time. They are not easy to read at all. Maybe if Fe is dominant instead of auxiliary, it makes a difference.

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  9. #39
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    Quote Originally Posted by highlander View Post
    I agree with a lot of what you say in this thread but this part is simply not right. Try figuring out an ISFJ's emotions some time. They are not easy to read at all. Maybe if Fe is dominant instead of auxiliary, it makes a difference.
    But they show outward expression, even if you aren't seeing their true inner self. If an ISFJ cares about you, and you're crying your eyes out, they're not gonna look at you and say "oh." They're also more inclined to social norms of expression of caring than the strange and unemotional acts of service you might see with an ISTJ. An ISTJ might leave some types wondering if they love them at all, because they don't know to interpret their loyalty, consistency, gifts, and acts of service as love, because you're not getting any mushy-gushy affection or saying "I love you, you mean the world to me" etc.

    Like I remember once I said to my grandfather when I was a moody teenager that he didn't love me. He said, "WHAT THE HELL I HAVE GIVEN YOU EVERYTHING. I AM YOUR BEST FRIEND." And now as an adult I see it so clearly, that I would have been nowhere without him, and he was more consistent and protective and structured in my life than my own mother.

    I still think with an ISFJ you'd have less doubts.

  10. #40
    Senior Member sculpting's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Elfboy View Post
    no, not at all. while we may be bubbly and enthusiastic on the outside and most ENFPs tend to share their energy with the outside world, we seldom share our actual feelings, which are more akin to something you would read in a piece of dramatic literature or fantasy story. the feelings of most ENFPs feel out of place in the "real" world and, on the rare occasion where we do share them, they are often met with confusion and or awkward moments (most FPs learn early on who they can trust to share their feelings with). to give you an example. imagine you are sitting at a table eating with a bunch of (American) football fans while you are daydreaming about liberating an oppressed peoples or wandering through a Alice in Wonderland-esque landscape.
    Agreed totally. Few people see what I feel deeply as I recognize that it would be odd to them. Thus I play, I energize others, I bring a bit of bubble into each conversation and I exchange lots of ideas. I make random jokes to make them laugh. But none of that is what I feel deeply about-actually very often all of that aims to avoid topics I feel deeply about. I once saw another enfp say we use Ne to "fake" people out to avoid emotionally intense topics. Highly evasive.

    Quote Originally Posted by highlander View Post
    This is pretty interesting. Can you elaborate on this more with some real examples?
    For instance rather than telling you about my family or what I feel about them, instead I would turn the conversation to your family and listen to what you chose to share and weave the conversation around topics of interest to you. I'd then pay a lot of attention to things around me-food, wine, surroundings and let Ne and Fi sort of dance along them. A great deal of momentary pleasure and happiness can be molded around an interaction with another without actualy exposing deep feelings on a topic. None of it on purpose, rather just natural evasive patterns that can be seen in retrospect.

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