The third case was something that I would have expected from the start and I also had come to terms with the fact that we were on two very different paths and our roads were diverging. I think I knew from the start that it wasn't a good idea to get involved, but I underestimated the power of proximity and emotion trumping rational understanding of the facts. I wasn't willing to change my belief system or life priorities, yet I didn't want to lose him either because by then I loved him. I was living in an isolated place and we had gotten close emotionally very quickly. Even though a greater part of the relationship was negative than positive, when things were good, they were really good. I had expected that after we left he wouldn't contact me again, especially since he hadn't even said good-bye, so it was a surprise when he did stay in touch, and another surprise when he quit.
I can deal with rejection, but I find it hard when the person's behaviour is inconsistant, because it keeps roiling up my own feelings and keeping me feeling invested. Although us breaking up was something I could rationally see was for the best, I certainly wouldn't have initiated it and felt confused and deeply hurt that he acted to others as though it was no big deal. By the time he cut off contact, it helped that some time had gone by and that I was less involved, so it wasn't as difficult because it wasn't a big shock in the way that the other two situations were. I don't like emotional surprises.