I'm very much inclined to agree with OA and Seymour. Being accommodating, understanding and open-minded is first and foremost in my mind when evaluating an issue. I wish to add to what they already said on how others can mistakenly conclude that Fi see things in black and white. I think some of what I describe is intertwined with Ne, so I will keep it specific to my approach, so as not to wrongly attribute certain aspects to all Fi-users.
I form my evaluations internally and in the process explore many different aspects of an issue: the various arguments for and against, the (likely and known) feelings and intentions of the parties involved, other possible explanations that haven't been explored etc etc. Amongst all this complexity I try to reach a conclusion, albeit one with caveats that acknowledge the imperfect nature of it and the unfortunate drawbacks. In spite of these conflicting issues, I can come to believe very strongly in that conclusion because much thought has been put into it - and in certain circumstance I will become quite passionate in my expression of it.
However, other people can't see this internal process, which can cause them to believe that it did not take place. In some cases, it may be that I haven't clearly conveyed the fact I have considered the various issues and perspectives involved well enough. But just as often (if not, more often) I explain all of my caveats and people ignore them, or perhaps believe them to be disingenuous, and then blame me for being heartless or disloyal or whatever feeling the issue at hand inspires. In fact what is happening is that they choose to see my decision in black and white terms and refuse to take into account the qualifications and sympathetic acknowledgments I raised.
And as a disclaimer (and with full acknowledgement of the irony of adding one), I wish to emphasize that such situations as described above, are actually very rare. Mostly I am accused of being far too accommodating, tolerant, tentative, and even weird or sick for being inclined to defend the, supposedly, indefensible. However, eventually one must draw a line. I can strongly sympathise with a murderer and understand the reasons why he did it, but will still advocate that he be put away for a long time. This is what people seem have difficulty with; the fact that I can be so understanding, and yet so unforgiving at the same time. I suppose this is why they try to peg me as being one or the other in any given situation, when all I am doing is attempting to find the best possible solution among the many shades of grey.
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