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What do you do to calm yourself down when you're anxious?

iris.moon

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I was thinking about that. I do a lot of S things to calm down, like looking at old photographs, handworking, hugging, running slowly for half an hour, focusing on every single part of my body, trying to "feel" the things around me while thinking about nothing.... They're things I don't usually like doing, but they help a lot when I'm anxious. So I was guessing: is it the same for everyone? Are there differences between N/S types?
 

citizen cane

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I exercise, meditate, and/ or try to look at the positive things in my life.
 

Tiger Owl

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manu stuprare
 

Randomnity

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I'm not very good at changing my moods, so I don't usually try. Usually I just have to let the storm pass. It's usually gone the next day, especially if I sleep well, although sometimes I do get sort of a "grumpiness hangover" where I just wake up in a bad mood because I was grumpy the week before.

I did divert myself from being irrationally furious awhile ago by kicking a ball hard against the house for a while and then playing a fairly mindless yet entertaining simple computer game for an hour or so, drinking an herbal tea. It calmed me down enough to sleep, anyway.

edit: oh, one thing I used to do that worked pretty well was go out walking in random directions until exhausted, looking at things while thinking about whatever it was. haven't done that in a while for whatever reason.
 
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Hmmm... I don't really do anything to relieve my anxiety, for I allow such to flourish about. It is what gives me power. I feed my anxiety with treacherous mastermind plots that do absolutely nothing.
 

ICUP

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Take a bath. I take a bath almost every night. It works to relax the muscles.
 
A

Anew Leaf

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I was thinking about that. I do a lot of S things to calm down, like looking at old photographs, handworking, hugging, running slowly for half an hour, focusing on every single part of my body, trying to "feel" the things around me while thinking about nothing.... They're things I don't usually like doing, but they help a lot when I'm anxious. So I was guessing: is it the same for everyone? Are there differences between N/S types?

I think it can be very soothing and helpful to try and ground oneself with the present moment when one is feeling very anxious and worried.

Some things that help me:

  • Taking a walk or bike ride outside, or doing a work out on my elliptical. (Something to make my body move and make me focus on the present instead of being lost in my head.)
  • Breathing REALLY deeply into all lobes of my lungs. (This sounds really bizarre when written like that ;), but it works. There are calming receptors on the lower lobes of our lungs that help trigger a calmer mood. I usually try laying down in bed or sitting comfy on the floor and then slowly inhaling and exhaling.
  • Calling/Emailing a friend.
  • Journaling
  • Watching an old movie that I love/makes me laugh/makes me cry/etc.
  • Taking a relaxing bath with instrumental music and reading a book
  • Cleaning/Organizing my house
 
G

garbage

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General anxiety is more difficult for me to dissect and deal with. But if there are just one or two things that I'm really worried about, then I find it's helpful to exaggerate the problems and my reactions to them in my own mind. Sort of analogous to a reducto ad absurdum process.. sort of. It helps me make light of the situation, it makes me feel less oriented toward "punishment" and more toward "achievement," and it leads to a perspective of "wanting to" do something rather than "having to" do it.

It's all about properly framing a problem and my perspective on it. I ask myself--what are the potential consequences, and are they actually so bad? I've learned that it turns out there are very, very few things where the end consequence really matters as much as I'd think at first glance. If I find out I can't have kids or if I can't achieve tenure, for example, then I can work around those things in the long run.

Talking it out with some trusted folks might help with the whole framing process, too.

:cheers:
 

21%

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Distractions tend to make my problems worse. I usually pace around, drink iced water and make a plan on how to deal with the cause of my anxiety. I'm such a J. :blush:
 

Lexus

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My anxiety doesn't arrive until I have nothing else to distract myself with, therefore it usually shows itself when I lay in bed. It takes an hour for me to fall asleep usually and turn the brain off where that time is spent just, picking up random thoughts anywhere.

I tend to take on a great deal of stress in my life and overlook it and I know this well about myself, so when I am anxious consider that foremost. My anxiety usually starts to focus on health based issues; heart rate, breathing, etc. Until I freak myself out. I grew up with frequent panic attacks, now being an adult I know my anxiety as a child was due to my ability to observe EVERYTHING and analyze it to death, simply because I enjoy knowing things. That and a lot of other things.

It's funny, I'll go into near death situations happily, because I seek the adrenaline rush..but freak myself out at bed time, when my thoughts absorb me. Therefore, walking or bike riding doesn't help me like it should most anxious types. I still have to sit, eventually, I'll have to think without anything to distract me. I've learned my anxiety is an illusion. When I worry about things I have no immediate influence on; fixed income, car accidents, death of a family member, something disturbing I saw, obligations next day, having to wake early for work, etc - my brain worries because it thinks if it obsesses over everything, it can control it.

The best way for me to deal with my anxiety is to think about what is really bothering me, that my life is stressful and I take on too much at once and also, I either need to not "meander' in thought at bedtime and get over myself, or "let everything go"..and it works. To a degree. Anxiety is like any other feeling or symptom be it happiness, hunger, sadness, tired, etc...it's a sign that something is affecting you, it's secondary..therefore I see it like a mystery to be solved. Whatever is bothering you can be resolved and if not, maybe a doctor is best lol.
 

Vizzy

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Haven't really thought about this before.
Whether it's a job interview, driving test or speech, I don't know if I actually deal with the anxiousness itself. I'd keep thinking about/anticipating/focusing my attention on the task at hand.

In order to feel calm about an interview, I would review my notes and rehearse to feel prepared enough. That's how I combat anxiousness. Distractions, words of affirmation or scented baths won't do anything.
 

mmhmm

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i have to call somebody up.
then just talk and talk and talk.
to just get it out of my system.

or take a xanax.
 

ArghJo

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I distract myself I guess :s and it makes it worse.
 

INTP

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confront the anxiety causing issue by feeling the anxiety and analyzing the causes(and my relation to the problem). i really dislike the idea of suppressing it by distracting myself, i think it will just bury it deeper and it coming up whether i want it or not at some point
 

Red Herring

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Long answer:
It depends on what is causing the anxiety.

If I am really exited about something, positive or negative, it helps to externalize the emotion by sharing it with somebody or blogging or journaling about it (in that order). Studies also show that swearing helps reduce stress and pain (as long as you don't overuse it and become accustomed to it, then the effectv wears off)

If I just had a fight the best thing is to withdraw, go for a walk and calm down, flush the stress hormones out of the system and become calm and rational again before I continue the conversation. In that context, reading or watching tv won't help, but walking or doing a productive manual task like washing the dishes (a classic for me!) helps a lot. Talking to somebody else might also be an option.

If it is anxiety before a test or interview or a difficult job, I seldom get that but usually focus completely on being in good shape (making sure I slept well and had a good breakfast for once) and review notes until the last minute so I can feel like I did all I could to be prepared.

If it is a more general, abstract anxiety or angst - my main fear is being incompetent and therefor dying poor and lonely under a bridge - I can either a) use distraction through reading or watching something that will occupy my mind, especially browsing a bookshelf, touching the books and scamming the dustjackets does wonders for me!!! or do the opposite and b) face the fear head on by doing something productive that will reduce the risk of dying poor and lonely under a bridge (like writing bills, doing my taxes, researching professional alternatives and new customers, etc), that way I feel more in control of things. Talking does not help here, at least not much.

Short answer:
Taking a walk, distraction through reading or talking about it and anaylizing it to death
 

Fire

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In no particular order: Spending time with people, getting outside, exercising, prayer, creative visualisation, playing guitar.
 

PJWakt

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physical activities or music, or just being outside more for a change of view
 
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