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  1. #51
    Senior Member ceecee's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Athenian200 View Post
    An NTJ and NFJ would make good friends, advisers, co-workers, and counselors for each other, but there would be no chemistry because they're too similar in some way, and ironically because of that similarity, they tend to look down on one another for the way they make decisions on some level, even if they consciously try to overcome it. The feelings would be more like those between siblings.
    I had to quote this just because it made me laugh, looking at my own intj/enfj relationship. I don't think you're wrong, however. If we had no chemistry, my ENFJ and I likely would be very close friends. He is my consigliere and I embrace his method and want his guidance because it is different from my own view.

    My honest feelings is that, for us, it works because I am the INTJ and he is the ENFJ and not the other way around. Being male and being female can't be completely trumped by type, there is just too much going on biologically.

    I know this is a general observance and of course mileage may vary depending on the people. I do have an ENFP best female friend, although I don't know if I reveal my inner feelings to her at all. She seems far more comfortable to come to me when she needs to hear....are you listening to the idiocy coming out of your mouth? Get in here, crazy. Everyone wants a person who won't judge and this is true of her.
    I like to rock n' roll all night and *part* of every day. I usually have errands... I can only rock from like 1-3.

  2. #52
    Protocol Droid Athenian200's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ceecee View Post
    My honest feelings is that, for us, it works because I am the INTJ and he is the ENFJ and not the other way around. Being male and being female can't be completely trumped by type, there is just too much going on biologically.
    I agree, that can definitely be an influence. If there's enough biological chemistry, a person can be drawn to stay in a relationship for a long time with someone they have NO emotional compatibility with... let alone someone who makes a good friend. A relationship with one's shadow, or one's own type, isn't outside the realm of possibility. Of course, it depends on the individual people, how attractive they find each other, how strong their libido is, which type is which gender, cultural background, religion, values, etc. If I've seen it to work the way I do most of the time, it may well be because the NT is usually male, and the NF is usually female. And often even when it's the other way around, the same pattern often applies, though the tendency isn't as pronounced in that case.

    The thing about using typology in this way, is that there are a LOT of factors that aren't incorporated. So many that I almost wince at the idea of making prescriptions based on type. The imperfection needs to be remembered when consulting typology for dating advice.

    Thank you for the feedback, though.

  3. #53
    brainheart
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mephistopheles View Post
    Isn't coming your idealism in your way if you "use" black humor?
    As long as it's actually unique and creative, I love it. Team America is one of my favorite movies, South Park one of my favorite shows. But I think Family Guy is dumb, so I find it's humor more offensive. And yes, as OrangeAppled said, when it's just straight-up mean, then it's not funny, and it bothers me. And it all depends on my current mood. Sometimes things offend me way more than they would at other times. Note my interaction with INTP. On other days I probably would have just rolled my eyes, but... I hate to admit this... PMS-time, gah....

  4. #54

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    Quote Originally Posted by brainheart View Post
    As long as it's actually unique and creative, I love it. Team America is one of my favorite movies, South Park one of my favorite shows. But I think Family Guy is dumb, so I find it's humor more offensive. And yes, as OrangeAppled said, when it's just straight-up mean, then it's not funny, and it bothers me. And it all depends on my current mood. Sometimes things offend me way more than they would at other times. Note my interaction with INTP. On other days I probably would have just rolled my eyes, but... I hate to admit this... PMS-time, gah....
    :P From what i've learned by having a female INFP girlfriend and best-friend, when those GRRRrr > kill 'em all moments occur, just listen to some really awesome metal it channels it pretty well

    Also I agree with the family guy thing, I personally prefer south park (in fact i'm watching it right now while typing this) FG has sort of become 'background noise, or oh I need some filler humour if i can't find anything interesting" but Seth makes an occasional funny, or I'll just watch for the storyline.

  5. #55
    brainheart
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    Quote Originally Posted by The_World_As_Will View Post
    :P From what i've learned by having a female INFP girlfriend and best-friend, when those GRRRrr > kill 'em all moments occur, just listen to some really awesome metal it channels it pretty well
    I prefer Pissed Jeans. [

  6. #56
    Tier 1 Member LunaLuminosity's Avatar
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    I don't even get the being paired with another type thing. Why can't NTs pair with NTs (and so on)? I think it's less tricky that way.

  7. #57
    Certified Sausage Smoker Elfboy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by brainheart View Post
    I'd say my friends primarily tend to be NFs (with some NTs, SPs, and SJs tossed in there) and those I seem to be attracted to irl tend to be SPs. SPs seem to be the golden ticket- they get me out of my head, make me have fun, lighten me up. NTs, on the other hand, keep me in my head and make me feel too emotional. So what's this about, eh? Any NT/NF pairs out there got anything positive to say about it?
    agreed, ESFPs are hot
    as far as friends go, most of mine are usually NTJ or NFP (my best friend is ENTJ). I think NF-NT friendships work because of the "finally someone who can intellectually keep up with me" factor. I prefer talking to people online most of the time because it gives people more time to respond. most people who I try to talk to in real life are like "WTF?!" unless I kick it back a notch on the intellectual intensity. NFs and NTs are very mentally intense and give each other someone to use their full intellectual capabilities on. Sensors most of the time would rather actually do something than have an intense verbal spar or discuss the future direction of the world for several hours at a time.
    I really don't get the attraction thing though. I love NTs, but I just don't find them sexy at all. not that I can't see why other people wouldn't, but I definitely need a Feeler partner.

  8. #58
    Senior Member KDude's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Elfboy View Post
    I think NF-NT friendships work because of the "finally someone who can intellectually keep up with me" factor..

  9. #59
    Certified Sausage Smoker Elfboy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by KDude View Post
    lol. the pick is funny, but I'm not sure as to what you're trying to convey with it.

  10. #60
    Senior Member INTP's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Elfboy View Post
    lol. the pick is funny, but I'm not sure as to what you're trying to convey with it.
    there is also something that Ts are able to benefit from Fs
    "Where wisdom reigns, there is no conflict between thinking and feeling."
    — C.G. Jung

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