one way i've found of getting around this, which i have learned mostly from observing my mom (ESFJ), is to flatter the person you're talking to while offering neutral suggestions as a different way of getting the intended outcome, if that makes sense. so in this example, maybe like telling the guy how much you appreciate his work, how people are really excited about it, etc, but mention that something occurred to you, which is that maybe he would be able to reach even more people by extending his efforts out to women too, if he hasn't already considered that (which, given Pi, he may well have, and chose not to for a specific reason.) and if he says he'd rather not, then he'll probably explain his reasoning why, and you can either be in accordance with that or, if you still disagree, present your case for why you think it'd be beneficial.
for me, it's been a big growing experience to need to shift myself to understand things in this light, but sometimes it's a much more effective system than the Fi-Te way of going about things. it feels a little disingenuous sometimes, but i try to think of it in terms of supporting and respecting the person while trying to change an outcome, instead of my conventional ideal-orientation. i think that it's hard to shift to people-loyalty, but when i'm thinking about my relationship with my best friend (ENFJ), for instance, i feel like i just have to "suspend" my own rules and be patient, and that's how i'm loyal to her. i know that she also has to do the same to put up with my more open temper and less interpersonal awareness.
Originally Posted by Orobasi echo both of these sentimentsI dont really feel "loyalty" to those I am in close relationships with. Loyalty isnt the correct word. Devotion is a better word to use.