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  1. #11
    A passer by yvonne's Avatar
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    what can happen with my ESFP, too, is that he can blow up and after he's cooled down, it's like nothing had happened (while i'm still confused, lol)... and he also cares a lot about people.

    it used to be pretty hard for us sometimes making it work with our emotions... and i know that i definitely have my faults, also... haha.

  2. #12
    Senior Member ColonelGadaafi's Avatar
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    Just to add to this interesting discussion between yvonne and jennifer. We off charge our emotions by doing thing's. It is by far the best way of discharging negativity or depression.
    "Where can you flee? What road will you use to escape us? Our horses are swift, our arrows sharp, our swords like thunderbolts, our hearts as hard as the mountains, our soldiers as numerous as the sand. Fortresses will not detain us, nor arms stop us. Your prayers to God will not avail against us. We are not moved by tears nor touched by lamentations."

  3. #13
    Senior Member Shimmy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Windigo View Post
    What would make an ESFP go crazy?
    Is it a trick question? Is it:

    "Did you mean: What would make an ESFP go normal?"
    (removed)

  4. #14
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    Boredom.

  5. #15
    Senior Member ThatsWhatHeSaid's Avatar
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    Also, lots of acid.

  6. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by ColonelGadaafi View Post
    Just to add to this interesting discussion between yvonne and jennifer. We off charge our emotions by doing thing's. It is by far the best way of discharging negativity or depression.
    That explains why everytime I seemed depressed, my ESFP mom made me wash the car!

    Quote Originally Posted by xNTP View Post
    Also, lots of acid.
    Uncle Syd makes EVERYONE go crazy!!! :crazy::chicken:

    "Did you guys see the SIZE of that chicken?" --Dirty Steve

  7. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by Shimmy View Post
    Is it a trick question? Is it:

    "Did you mean: What would make an ESFP go normal?"
    My daughter's standard reply would be, "Your face!" But I will have to ammend he answer to, "Your avatar!"

  8. #18
    A passer by yvonne's Avatar
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    also, another positive thing about him is that i admire his ability to take pleasure in little things and live in the moment (it and also his openness with feelings were very "healing" to me when we met). i also never felt like he really judged me. i wouldn't even mind to get more (rational) input from him sometimes, positive and negative. he's also very friendly and kids adore him. he's not arrogant at all. at times i wish he was more determined, or took more pride in his efforts. i love the fact that he's very real. there are many things about him that have a stabilizing effect on me, too.

    we are both making an effort, that's for sure. i don't think we would be together anymore, if that wasn't the case.

    being more considerate about feelings constantly was good advice. i still have to work on that, on just listening. we have to work things out in a way that doesn't force me, or him to compromise too much, but i think that can be done. i think we can work it out so that it benefits us both in the end... experience has taught me that he needs time to process some ideas i throw at him... but experience has also taught me that even then he might not think that they're important, lol...

    i'm still a "tough things out" kind of person in some ways... and he is emotional and spontaneous...

    it was good to read about how action can be "healing" to ESFPs.

    thank you!!

    eta: one other thing is that he can get very restless at times. i think he needs to work on channeling that energy wisely, or learning some relaxation techniques, whatever works for him. sometimes my presence and touch helps. (too bad that he's not always very good at giving it back to me exactly in those moments when i would need him to be)... sometimes i feel like he's preoccupied (i have no idea if that's intentional, or unintentional), especially, if i would like to talk about important things, lol.

    btw... i wonder do other ESFPs have good memory, too? it's amazing how much random info my boyfriend can just dig up from his brain!! he's also very gifted verbally.

  9. #19
    A passer by yvonne's Avatar
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    i just have to come here to tell you guys how grateful i am for your insight! we discussed about these things yesterday with my so and i feel so much closer to him now... i am very, very, very, very happy!

  10. #20
    Senior Member BlueFlame's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by yvonne View Post
    btw... i wonder do other ESFPs have good memory, too? it's amazing how much random info my boyfriend can just dig up from his brain!! he's also very gifted verbally.
    Oh, mine has a great memory. Except when I ask him to do things he doesn't want to do. Then he seems to go senile.

    Quote Originally Posted by yvonne
    what can happen with my ESFP, too, is that he can blow up and after he's cooled down, it's like nothing had happened (while i'm still confused, lol)... and he also cares a lot about people.

    it used to be pretty hard for us sometimes making it work with our emotions... and i know that i definitely have my faults, also... haha.
    My husband blows up pretty infrequently, but, honestly, I've learned to ignore it unless I did something to him, because 99% of the time, it has nothing to do with me. In general, ESFP aren't bothered by the little things in life, so when mine is, it's usually the bigger things in the past or future being dealt with in the present by exploding. But I think a lot of that can be avoided by positive energy channeling, like a working project. My husbands hot rods and motorcycles keep him sane.

    he just seems to not have much ambition/ sense about his goals in life... even though it kind of seems like he does, because he talks about it sometimes (usually when i ask him, rarely initiating that conversation himself)... but i feel like he gets stuck in instant pleasures and his sometimes irrational feelings that he can't put aside. sometimes it seems to me that he doesn't have "long term direction", or that he hasn't got a map and a compass, if that makes sense... he doesn't seem to control himself much at all, but just goes with the flow.
    Long-term planning is definitely not for them, but that's where you come in, I suppose. I know that's my lot in life. And when my planning fails, he can make things work in that moment until I regain my bearings. It's all about balance.
    I think the key with ESFPs is that they have to do things their own way on their own time, and forced into doing the things that need to be done immediately if they disagree. (Kidding about that last part....mostly.) They're motivation isn't as much in the future as it is in right now
    My hubby dropped out of high school and got his GED. Went straight to college, but the long series of classes before he got to the stuff that he found applicable was unenjoyable and just not his thing. So he dropped out of college (with a .8 GPA, might I add.)
    But he found a career where he could be his own boss, have freedom, lots of interaction, not be cooped up in an office, and he got immediate satisfaction and almost-immediate rewards, and he was making six figures by the time he was twenty years old. He just handles things day to day, and hour to hour, but it works for him!
    I do have to handle the money....
    I learned that early on. In fact, one of the conditions of our marriage was that he would have zero control over our finances. People think that's controlling of me, but they've obviously never been married to him.


    Quote Originally Posted by Windigo
    Wondering what the tertiary for an ESFP would look like? What about their shadow functions?
    To me, their tert Te looks like magic. Just these out of nowhere moments where they can come up with ingenious solutions to to problems...solutions that can seem completely unconventional, but work. And I think that's something incredibly important and common for ESFPs to develop to get them out of the frequent emergency situations that pesky Se-domness tends to get them into.

    ~*79% Extraverted*~
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    ~*74% Feeling*~
    ~*58% Judging*~

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