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  1. #11
    Member maydelle's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Halla74 View Post
    (1) I am calm.
    (2) Regardless of the genesis of your OP, my response remains unchanged.
    (3) Ask yourself that very same question. Does it sound like a good deal? I didn't think so.
    (4) I'm not hating, just giving you blunt advice.
    1) I'm happy to hear that... 0_0
    2) I already know what my opinion is, I wanted to know what OTHER people's opinions were BTW I know it's not a good deal ........what a surprise huh?
    3) Good. I like blunt advice.......although by asking that question I wasn't intending to be given advice because. It isn't defining me........ another surprise!

  2. #12
    Sniffles
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    No thank you - Ive been throught that enough.

  3. #13
    4x9 cascadeco's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by maydelle View Post
    What I want to know is how many of you would be willing to stay in a relationship where the other person doesn't show any signs of love towards you?
    The person doesn't show ANY signs of love towards me? I wouldn't be willing to stay in the relationship.

    As Orobas outlines, though, people show love/care in different ways. So do I expect the other person to show 'signs of love' towards me in the same way I would? No.. but that's where communication comes in. I would still need to know, believe, and trust in him caring for me, wanting me in his life, and demonstrating that in his own way. If not in words, then in actions.

    (It might be easier for me, though, as I'm not a particularly verbal/effusive person, and my expressions are much more in body language, physical affection, and extending myself in helping and wanting to make things easier for them.)
    "...On and on and on and on he strode, far out over the sands, singing wildly to the sea, crying to greet the advent of the life that had cried to him." - James Joyce

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  4. #14

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    Quote Originally Posted by maydelle View Post
    Being an INTJ myself I've noticed that in any type of relationship I've ever had
    I have not been able (or willing) to give back as much intensity as I've received.

    What I want to know is how many of you would be willing to stay in a relationship where the other person doesn't show any signs of love towards you?
    As an INTJ, I understand this part - "I have not been able (or willing) to give back as much intensity as I've received."
    But not this part: "a relationship where the other person doesn't show any signs of love towards you?"

    They're not the same thing at all. I have been in healthy relationships where I show signs of love. But you have to help your partner recognize them (like, when I say "yay" it's the same as when you say "YAY!") But I can't imagine anyone staying in a relationship where they receive no signs of love. That's not an INTJ thing, that's a maturity thing.
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  5. #15
    L'anima non dimora Donna Cecilia's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by maydelle View Post
    Being an INTJ myself I've noticed that in any type of relationship I've ever had
    I have not been able (or willing) to give back as much intensity as I've received.
    This is because you still haven't found a worthy partner.

    If I'm into in someone, I let him know. If I say 'I love you', it's for real. And I don't feel like reminding him about it all the time. It is not that I'm unaffectionate.

    Although I hate the typical displays of affection, I do express it.


    What I want to know is how many of you would be willing to stay in a relationship where the other person doesn't show any signs of love towards you?
    Not me.

    And, I won't be in a relationship with someone who doesn't mean anything to me. Not only because I simply can't give him anything in return, but because I don't like deceiving myself. No matter how strong that person's feelings for me are.

    "An intelligent hell would be better than a stupid paradise."
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  6. #16
    nee andante bechimo's Avatar
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    What I want to know is how many of you would be willing to stay in a relationship where the other person doesn't show any signs of love towards you?
    No. Is caring a secret?

  7. #17
    Member maydelle's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by cascadeco View Post
    The person doesn't show ANY signs of love towards me? I wouldn't be willing to stay in the relationship.

    As Orobas outlines, though, people show love/care in different ways. So do I expect the other person to show 'signs of love' towards me in the same way I would? No.. but that's where communication comes in. I would still need to know, believe, and trust in him caring for me, wanting me in his life, and demonstrating that in his own way. If not in words, then in actions.

    (It might be easier for me, though, as I'm not a particularly verbal/effusive person, and my expressions are much more in body language, physical affection, and extending myself in helping and wanting to make things easier for them.)
    I agree with you. Can I just state that the question I asked wasn't intended to come across as a question coming from my inner mind just a thought I've been having on human tolerance.

  8. #18
    Member maydelle's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by EffEmDoubleyou View Post
    But I can't imagine anyone staying in a relationship where they receive no signs of love. That's not an INTJ thing, that's a maturity thing.
    The question I asked was about a thought I've having based on human tolerance and other people's opinion on it. If it was based on my relationship than I wouldn't have asked because I already know the answer to that.

  9. #19
    shadow boxer strawberries's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by maydelle View Post

    'Signs of love' for me would be: doing something I don't like for them, being careful with my words when I'm with them, wanting to impress them, thinking about them constantly and acting like a complete fool around them.
    that aint love.

  10. #20
    not to be trusted miss fortune's Avatar
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    as the willing partner of an ISTJ... who is actually crazy about him, I can say that you IxTJ people are funny to deal with

    he's MUCH more likely to show love through actions and helping me out than through words or presents or anything... like doing things he doesn't really LIKE to do for me and things of that sort (like going out to my work social events with me even though I KNOW that he doesn't want to go!)... Kind of like what you described there

    Mostly all that's needed is just realizing that everyone's different and that they show that they love you in different way, so yes, even INTJs can be loved- unless they adore Ayn Rand

    the important question is are YOU willing to deal with other type's quirks?
    “Oh, we're always alright. You remember that. We happen to other people.” -Terry Pratchett

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