Proactivity in Friendships/Relationships

[KDude]

What does it mean if you're usually the more communicative person when it comes to dating (or even friendships)? I'm usually the person who seems to ask more questions, calls first, writes an email.. Can an introvert be the outgoing person in a relationship? I'm not particularly avoidant or unassertive. If anything, I'll do things to help someone not be that way.

Secondly, I'm prone to fantasizing a little, and try to make reality line up with whatever potential I see. Is this an N thing? On the flipside, I tend to see what might be a problem that isn't really worth working through, and just cut it off before there's too much drama. I'll judge things beforehand and don't exactly take situations as they come (and I'm guessing that's what SPs usually do).

My mentality is different when it comes to groups.. I mean, I barely do anything to affect groups or wider social situations (or be affected in turn). So I'm iffy on calling myself an extrovert. Just seems like I take on extroverted qualities when it's one-to-one (if that even makes sense).

 

[Moiety]

What you just described in the last paragraph is Fi. I personally rarely talk to the group or try to steer things too much. I'm more of a person-to-person person

 

[KDude]

What you just described in the last paragraph is Fi. I personally rarely talk to the group or try to steer things too much. I'm more of a person-to-person person

I could see that..

Still curious on the extroversion angle. It's descriptions like this that leave me confused. Is it accurate?

ISFPs may have a problem with communication. With Introverted Feeling dominating their personality, they are more vulnerable then most to being hurt. Perhaps because of this, they tend to hold back part of themselves from others, and do not always say what they think or feel. This is especially true during conflict situations, which the ISFP abhors more than anything in the world. Confrontations and arguments are very difficult for the ISFP to deal with. They feel personally threatened in these situations.

ISTP doesn't sound like me either. Too present oriented (apparently).

ISTPs take their commitments on a day-by-day basis. Even if they say "I do", it usually means "I do for now". They do not like to make lifelong commitments, although they may very well be involved in lifelong relationships which they have taken one day at a time. [..]

One day, they may feel completely, intensely in love with their mate, and the next day they may be totally disinterested, or perhaps even ready to move on. This "live for the moment" type of approach is different from how most other types experience their feelings, and is difficult for many to understand. Consequently, the ISTP may be called "fickle" or "cold".



Back to the drawing board, I guess.