Firstly, thank you all for responding, even those of you that would rather debate instead of taking the scrapping to Private Messages.
Here is my conclusion:
1. I have to have a type. My environment affects my behavior, which leaves me making changes to the way I live in order to achieve a goal I have set for myself.
2. My preferred type is ENTP. If I could, I would love to rip a bong on a couch, play Super Smash Bros. on the Nintendo 64, take adventures to every country in the world, think of different facets of life, reduce them to equations and write them down in a large notebook to be published for free after my death; however, life simply isn't that simple.
3. I'm not INFP. I'm simply not concerned about other people enough, and my morals and ethics hardly play any part of my thought process. The same goes for INFJ. I'm not ENTJ; I'm content doing nothing, and I despise an unnecessary amount of work. (Don't overanalyze these conclusions– these words are mere summaries of the reasons I came to them).
4. MBTI makes a hell of a lot more sense. Again, thanks to everyone who gave their thoughts here.