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  1. #151
    Plumage and Moult proteanmix's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Orobas View Post
    nobody said fe was evil...it was an attempt to describe it in a Te sorta way..Fe is beautiful.

    My idea was incorrect and overgeneralized and was flawed. It was rude of me to have put forth an idea that might have implied how another person thinks or feels. I respect that I am projecting my own problem onto other people. Each person is an isolated beautiful individual, and thus to imply they follow a pattern is incorrect. There is not truth to the patterns discussed within this thread. Please accept my apologies for the disruption of the thread flow. I will assume responsibility for the fact that all burdens of communication are mine to carry, and that my own flaws have prevented my clear understanding of the scenario at hand. If I can merge and flow with the group more in a more adequate fashion, then I shall have no problems in communication moving forward.
    I'm glad you've finally decided to join us. I think you'll like it here. This is indeed the more beautiful way.
    Relationships have normal ebbs and flows. They do not automatically get better and better when the participants learn more and more about each other. Instead, the participants have to work through the tensions of the relationship (the dialectic) while they learn and group themselves and a parties in a relationships. At times the relationships is very open and sharing. Other time, one or both parties to the relationship need their space, or have other concerns, and the relationship is less open. The theory posits that these cycles occur throughout the life of the relationship as the persons try to balance their needs for privacy and open relationship.
    Interpersonal Communication Theories and Concepts
    Social Penetration Theory 1
    Social Penetration Theory 2
    Social Penetration Theory 3

  2. #152
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    Quote Originally Posted by bologna View Post
    To the extent that it's blind, it's bad.

    Labeling stuff can be good, in order to characterize it, gain a clearer understanding of it, and draw patterns. Labels all have their blind spots, though, and those have to be recognized.


    well... I guess they don't have to be..
    It seems like the people that label are also the people that are steered by the labels. They cause each others demise. Yes this can be flipped around for the other functions. I am not trying to label the labelers as wrong. When this general concept of introversion plays onto itself whether within a single person or across a group setting we lose the world around us. But it doesnt mean that this introversion is wrong, its how we learn.

    Our body has defense mechanisms that we "cannot" control. Projection is a defense mechanism. Its a defense machanism to defend us from ourselves, to project our own fault, our own problems onto others so we can "see" them. Introversion is how we learn so the purpose is to learn and it can remain true to itself while we end up remaining blind to it.

    Makes me wonder can a function NOT be true to itself.
    Im out, its been fun

  3. #153
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    Quote Originally Posted by Orobas View Post
    nobody said fe was evil...it was an attempt to describe it in a Te sorta way..Fe is beautiful.

    My idea was incorrect and overgeneralized and was flawed. It was rude of me to have put forth an idea that might have implied how another person thinks or feels. I respect that I am projecting my own problem onto other people. Each person is an isolated beautiful individual, and thus to imply they follow a pattern is incorrect. There is not truth to the patterns discussed within this thread. Please accept my apologies for the disruption of the thread flow. I will assume responsibility for the fact that all burdens of communication are mine to carry, and that my own flaws have prevented my clear understanding of the scenario at hand. If I can merge and flow with the group more in a more adequate fashion, then I shall have no problems in communication moving forward.
    Quote Originally Posted by proteanmix View Post
    I'm glad you've finally decided to join us. I think you'll like it here. This is indeed the more beautiful way.

  4. #154
    The High Priestess Amargith's Avatar
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    I'm mystified. Don't take this the wrong way but what is the big deal and reason that it was so important for O to bend over backwards, and jump through 1000 hoops in order to regain grace with Fe-users? What was *so* wrong about her way? And why is it *such* a big deal and fuss, instead of a simple misunderstanding that we can move past once demystified?

    Honestly, someone explain this to me, coz it's one of those things I've been dying to understand for like my entire life.
    ★ڿڰۣ✿ℒoѵℯ✿ڿڰۣ★





    "Harm none, do as ye will”

  5. #155
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    Quote Originally Posted by Satine View Post
    I'm mystified. Don't take this the wrong way but what is the big deal and reason that it was so important for O to bend over backwards, and jump through 1000 hoops in order to regain grace with Fe-users? What was *so* wrong about her way? And why is it *such* a big deal and fuss, instead of a simple misunderstanding that we can move past once demystified?

    Honestly, someone explain this to me, coz it's one of those things I've been dying to understand for like my entire life.
    It's called herd mentality.

    It's disgusting.

    [YOUTUBE="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WZEJ4OJTgg8"][/YOUTUBE]

  6. #156
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    Sanctimony after apologies is not cool vv


    proteanmix did express something that acknowledges the worth of other viewpoints in general, the merit of individual understanding, and the specific viewpoint that ""the other side"" expresses:

    Quote Originally Posted by proteanmix View Post
    I do argue against and disagree that type is the main determiner of communication style. I'm beginning to see that if it helps you, do what helps you to understand.
    so please don't miss things like this

    thanks

  7. #157
    reborn PeaceBaby's Avatar
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    Just as preamble, I believe trying to ascribe behaviour to functions is like trying to un-bake a cake. All of the ingredients that make the "PB" cake are blended together to a homogeneous mixture, and then are chemically altered by the baking process. Can you see all the ingredients in isolation again? Nah, I'm a cake. Not bowlfuls of sugar, flour, butter Fe, Fi etc.

    Quote Originally Posted by proteanmix View Post
    I think people on this forum EXAGGERATE miscommunications.
    Quote Originally Posted by Orobas View Post
    Protean, I think on the forum we actually uncover the acute severity of the issue.
    I tend to think that the forum does uncover blind spots in our communications, and occasionally grossly so. Sometimes it seems that the closer we come to uncovering a truth, the farther away understanding becomes. It almost seems ... impossible.

    I think many miscommunications here (on the forum) originate out of reaction rather than response, regardless of type; out of a failure to reflect prior to posting.

    But that being said, I have noted miscommunication patterns that do seem to exist along typological lines, and they do tend to occur over and over again without resolution, without true comprehension between parties.

    For example, a generic conclusion recently reached in the INFJ threads ... Fe users appear to use data over time to decide whether to trust someone and let them in close, but Fi users appear to trust an individual until data consistently over-rules that misplaced sentiment. How can this difference ever truly be reconciled by either party? Intellectually perhaps, but not at the core of the heart.

    Quote Originally Posted by uumlau View Post
    ...I believe the miscommunications become more apparent BECAUSE of the forums.
    In some ways, yes. The written word lacks all of the nuances body language can convey to prevent others from mistaking our message or taking offense. And the chasm does seem wide sometimes, since we go deeper than regular conversation generally permits.

    Quote Originally Posted by Jaguar View Post
    A certain TypeC moderator doesn't want to have sex with me, what function shall I blame?
    Blame it on the fact that you don't have a P-ness.

    Quote Originally Posted by proteanmix View Post
    I'm glad you've finally decided to join us. I think you'll like it here. This is indeed the more beautiful way.
    protean, I think you make a lot of great points and I am taking your quote above tongue-in-cheek, as I don't believe my interpretation is your intent - but it could be read in an offensive, condescending way. Like you've brow-beaten Orobas down and now nod approvingly at her new compliance.
    "Remember always that you not only have the right to be an individual, you have an obligation to be one."
    Eleanor Roosevelt


    "When people see some things as beautiful,
    other things become ugly.
    When people see some things as good,
    other things become bad."
    Lao Tzu, Tao Te Ching

  8. #158
    Plumage and Moult proteanmix's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by PeaceBaby View Post
    protean, I think you make a lot of great points and I am taking this tongue-in-cheek, as I don't believe my interpretation is your intent, but it could be read in an offensive, condescending way. Like you've brow-beaten Orobas down and now nod approvingly at her new compliance.
    Gosh, it was a JOKE. Sorry, I'll use more smiley's next time. I was alluding to the Herd Mentality Zara so eloquently pointed out. I did think about that, but I trusted that people would get it. Guess not. I thought O's reply was overwrought and didn't at all accurately portray or address the points I made but whatever.

    You know, Oro made two lengthy replies to my post (which I thought were interesting), deleted both of them and left the most melodramatic, why-is-everybody-picking-on-me post for everyone to read as her grand exit.

    Well played. *golf clap*
    Relationships have normal ebbs and flows. They do not automatically get better and better when the participants learn more and more about each other. Instead, the participants have to work through the tensions of the relationship (the dialectic) while they learn and group themselves and a parties in a relationships. At times the relationships is very open and sharing. Other time, one or both parties to the relationship need their space, or have other concerns, and the relationship is less open. The theory posits that these cycles occur throughout the life of the relationship as the persons try to balance their needs for privacy and open relationship.
    Interpersonal Communication Theories and Concepts
    Social Penetration Theory 1
    Social Penetration Theory 2
    Social Penetration Theory 3

  9. #159
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    Quote Originally Posted by proteanmix View Post
    You know, Oro made two lengthy replies to my post (which I thought were interesting), deleted both of them and left the most melodramatic, why-is-everybody-picking-on-me post for everyone to read as her grand exit.

    Well played. *golf clap*
    :horor:

  10. #160
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    Quote Originally Posted by Zarathustra View Post
    :horor:

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