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Male Feelers

Jeffster

veteran attention whore
Joined
Jun 7, 2008
Messages
6,743
MBTI Type
ESFP
Enneagram
7w6
Instinctual Variant
sx
I think its once again a Se/Si vs Ne/Ni...notice how the SFPs in this thread dont think twice about being a male F, and yet the male NFs talk about it. Its probably only slightly better than being an NT.

Maybe so, because I don't have any idea what the heck the NF males in this thread are talking about.
 

William K

Uniqueorn
Joined
Aug 13, 2009
Messages
986
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
4w5
I think its once again a Se/Si vs Ne/Ni...notice how the SFPs in this thread dont think twice about being a male F, and yet the male NFs talk about it. Its probably only slightly better than being an NT.

I can agree with that. How you perceive things would probably affect your emotions more than how you judge things. It doesn't matter if you're a T or an F, if you make a good decision, you'll feel happy/content/satisfied/whatever.
 
G

Ginkgo

Guest
Male feelers get to feel females. Male thinkers are content just thinking about feeling females.
 

wolfy

awsm
Joined
Jun 30, 2008
Messages
12,251
...

During meetings, I'll pay barely any mind to what's actually being said. I tend to focus on how people are interacting, how they're feeling/reacting to the subject, and so on. I pick up on the personal priorities of other people during a discussion. I tailor my speech explicitly to harmonize disparate approaches and look for points of agreement.

But I don't readily state my own opinions as often as others do.
...

During meetings I like to think of something completely unrelated to the subject at hand. I don't think of others personal priorities unless they are directly involving me in them. Or I am directly involving them in mine. I state my opinions very clearly in meetings, always have. I don't like to argue or waffle, if I am asked my opinion I just give it. I let go after giving my opinion, except in those cases I feel strongly and fight tooth and nail to prove a point.
But for the most part I am happy to just give my opinion and let others deal with how they feel about it.

I remember when I was a teenager and I was asked what I thought of a song by my Grandpa. I tried to think how he felt and said I liked it. He said "It's crap" and turned it off. I always have given my own opinion from then on.
 

Snuggletron

Reptilian
Joined
Sep 25, 2009
Messages
2,224
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
10
Do you feel very different/challenged by your preference?
nope

What defines the F male compared to the T male?
decision making preference?

How are Fi males and Fe males different/similar?
However it's described in MBTI terms.

Did you have to peel back a culturally imposed layer of Tness to realise you are an F? Do you often test as a T?
Never tested as a T.
 

KDude

New member
Joined
Jan 26, 2010
Messages
8,243
Not to butt into the man cave or anything, but I've noticed this as well. My ESFP husband has always been a 'dude's dude'. Most of his friends are males, and they go drink and skateboard, be men together, etc. Where he notices the difference with a goodly chunk of his friends (who knows whether they are T or F?) has to do with conflicting values/principles. The boys come first for them over romantic relationships, while for my husband it's all about the wife and kids, being an honorable/good person, etc. For example, he just found out a friend of his is cheating on his girlfriend- he was the last in the group to find out, by the way, which I doubt is coincidence- his friends know how he is- and he says he just can't look at him the same way, it's hard for him.

But he definitely behaves differently around them- he'll try to keep up the dude act, but then he gets drunk and blabs on and on about how awesome his wife is. :rolleyes:

I love this thread, btw- I like the male club feel. And here I come and fuck it up... sorry...

10311-hope-for-men.jpg

This is no man cave. You can stay if you like :blush: Your husband sounds cool. You're my age right? And I assume he is too..(or close)? I still skateboard too, but I dunno if that's a man's activity. No one I know skates anymore.. I just mess around by myself a lot.

Maybe so, because I don't have any idea what the heck the NF males in this thread are talking about.

Me too heh.. But it seems we're all basically arriving to the same place, so it's all good :blush:
 
G

garbage

Guest
Not that I'm knocking it, but I have to pay attention to what's actually being said to "pick up on their personal priorities".

Oh, yeah. What's being said is, of course, a factor, but it's never the whole story.


A few days ago, I had a meeting with two of my business partners. One is a solid, straightforward businessman; the other works directly with me on medical research and has extensive training in the nursing field. I've worked with him for around six months, and with her for around a year.

We have an associate who has given us data that was crucial to the development of our product, but our discussion was centered around what our rights were. Our businessman and I were primarily leading the discussion here; I was 'resonating' with his viewpoint and so the discussion was mostly 'practical and legal'. But I could tell that our nurse was getting hesitant about the direction that our discussion was headed--that our associate was seemingly getting 'cut out' in her eyes--but he clearly wanted us to stand up for our own interests.

So I clearly and plainly stated that I saw this particular moral dilemma, innately seeing whether she agreed. I then noted that this discussion wasn't about 'screwing over' our associate, but rather determining what we were legally obligated to offer them and then working from there.

At that point, we turned the discussion to potential things that we could offer our associate in order to be 'fair', and as a 'thanks' for their help. So, on top of assuaging the 'ethical' issue at hand, we also determined that it made good business sense to offer them something and to keep a good working relationship with them.

That is what it means to analyze others' priorities and to synthesize disparate viewpoints.

Now, what did I think about all of this, before we came to agreement? I dunno.. it really didn't even occur to me. All I really saw was what the two of them thought.


That's not always a strength, either; it certainly has its disadvantages. My psychologist once asked me what I wanted in a partner. The question outright confused me. In fact, it was incomprehensible to me; it was as if she asked me something like, "Why does epistemology taste purple?" I'd been completely concerned with developing into the sort of person that a potential partner might value. I'd given no thought at all to my own priorities.
 

KDude

New member
Joined
Jan 26, 2010
Messages
8,243
I might have only picked up on body language, resistance in speech...things like that..

I can't put myself in your situation to describe how I would have handled that meeting exactly, but I think I try to get a feel by people's priorities from reading, and then either asking/confirming what's on their mind (basically calling them out), and handling it from there.
 
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