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Thread: Your shadow

  1. #1
    Senior Member Saslou's Avatar
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    Default Your shadow

    Can you go into your shadow but not take on the negative aspects of that type?

    Example - My job requires me to behave in a different manner than i am accustomed to. No structure nor routine amongst other things
    I am also in a relationship where i have to protect myself by behaving in a totally objective manner as if i become subjective, then I'd fall to pieces probably. My stress levels are higher than usual but i am very proud of myself in the way i am dealing with these persistent nuisances.

    My partner (INFP) and his friend (INTJ) are trying to type me at present as by my writing on another site, i am not behaving typically ESFJ. This is driving me insane, the fact that people who are not professionals in the matter seem to know me better than myself but then leads me to question myself, my beliefs and my whole structure.

    I did the humanmetrics test last night and came up as -
    Your Type is
    INTP
    Introverted Intuitive Thinking Perceiving
    Strength of the preferences %
    11 38 12 33

    Is that my shadow in play?

    If i am to believe my partner then i seem to be behaving more N than i ever have in my life, but it still seems foreign to me. I never test N, which is worrisome.

    I read the profile for an INTP in 'The 16 personality types, description for self-discovery' and it scared me how much i could relate to quite a bit of it.

    Now i am sure there are some very nice INTP's out there (Jock, Costrin and a few others) but i don't think i am like you. No disrespect.

    I am rambling.
    “I made you take time to look at what I saw and when you took time to really notice my flower, you hung all your associations with flowers on my flower and you write about my flower as if I think and see what you think and see—and I don't.”
    ― Georgia O'Keeffe

  2. #2
    Habitual Fi LineStepper JocktheMotie's Avatar
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    Your "shadow" would be an ISFP. No idea how you'd test INTP unless you were trying to or in weird mood. You keep the same letters, just flip the orientations. FeSiNeTi becomes FiSeNiTe.

    For example, my shadow is an ENTJ, and his name is Siegfried.



  3. #3
    Senior Member LeafAndSky's Avatar
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    Default

    You are rambling, and I am taking a break from transcribing audio files,
    so we meet in the moment. :-)

    Don't worry, be happy!

    Easier said than done, huh. About your supposed type change:
    so what? I've tested as different types at different times, too.
    Very different. The first time I ever took the test, back in about
    1977 (?), I was INTJ. Type is a handy handle but it doesn't
    define me. Is it important to you to have your type settled for
    all and forever? Oh. Yeah. The "J". :-)

    About your job: I'm glad you have one in this economy!

    About your relationship: Do you like being in a relationship where
    you have to "protect" yourself?

    It's the Ides of March. Maybe that explains everything.

    Best wishes!

  4. #4
    Senior Member ThatsWhatHeSaid's Avatar
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    Default

    I don't know exactly how MBTI and the shadow work together, but I'm familiar with how the shadow operates outside of that. Your shadow is the part of your personality you hate and are ashamed of--the part you go to great lengths to hide or change (or change in others). There are schools of psychology/psychotherapy (probably Jung's analytical psychology, but definitely Gestalt) that view happiness as the merger of the self and the shadow. In other words, you accept that your shadow is a part of you, unconditionally. It's real and actually quite a brilliant insight.

    Best wishes!

  5. #5
    Senior Member Saslou's Avatar
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    Trying to or weird mood .. Neither. I just gave them some consideration as opposed to answering quickly before i got bored.

    Interesting analysis though .. I was under the impression that my shadow would be INTP as -

    Under extreme stress, fatigue or illness, the ESFJ's shadow may appear - a negative form of INTP. Example characteristics are:

    * being very critical and finding fault with almost everything
    * having a pessimistic view of the future
    * suggesting ideas that are quite impractical
    * ignoring others' feelings

    So i was thinking if i am capable of doing the negative form of INTP whilst stressed then why am i not capable of doing the positive.

    Just a thought
    “I made you take time to look at what I saw and when you took time to really notice my flower, you hung all your associations with flowers on my flower and you write about my flower as if I think and see what you think and see—and I don't.”
    ― Georgia O'Keeffe

  6. #6
    a scream in a vortex nanook's Avatar
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    i dont know you but i think i like you, like when i look at your pictures, and what i see is sensitivity, and by sensitivity i mean the trait of being permeable to all parts of one self, meaning the so called shadow. its a great trait, don't just look at the negative sides, but its hard to handle, for sensitive people of other types it's just the same.

  7. #7
    a scream in a vortex nanook's Avatar
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    i know a guy who looks somehow like you and he does not know his type (why ??? probably a symptom of him being enneagram nine) but he says he thinks he might be an introverted perceiver. he is odd in many ways and i cant type him either.

  8. #8
    this is my winter song EJCC's Avatar
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    I dunno, Saslou. I've noticed with me that the type I act like depends on the situation I'm in, so maybe, since ESxJs are really adaptable and really good at modelling behavior, you've started to act a bit INTP? For example, when I'm in a silly mood or around silly people, or feel the need to be silly in order to keep the conversation going, my Ne gets a lot stronger, making me seem ENFP-ish. And when I'm in a terrible mood, I can be pretty emo/INFP.

    I dunno. I'm rambling too... wish I could be more helpful, lol

    Edit: To reassure you, I'll say that I'm 99% sure that you're ESFJ. I've told you this before (I think? maybe?), but in your video, you remind me a whole lot of (a British version of) an ESFJ friend of mine.
    No way in heck you're INTP, lol
    ~ g e t f e s t i v e ! ~


    EJCC: "The Big Questions in my life right now: 1) What am I willing to live with? 2) What do I have to live with? 3) What can I change for the better?"
    Coriolis: "Is that the ESTJ Serenity Prayer?"



    ESTJ - LSE - ESTj (mbti/socionics)
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    want to ask me something? go for it!

  9. #9
    Senior Member Saslou's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by LeafAndSky View Post
    Don't worry, be happy!

    Easier said than done, huh. About your supposed type change:
    so what? I've tested as different types at different times, too.
    Very different. The first time I ever took the test, back in about
    1977 (?), I was INTJ. Type is a handy handle but it doesn't
    define me. Is it important to you to have your type settled for
    all and forever? Oh. Yeah. The "J". :-)

    About your job: I'm glad you have one in this economy!

    About your relationship: Do you like being in a relationship where
    you have to "protect" yourself?

    It's the Ides of March. Maybe that explains everything.

    Best wishes!
    I am trying very hard to be happy. No i do not like being in a relationship where i have to protect myself.

    Thank you The Ideas of March it must be, lol

    Quote Originally Posted by xNTP View Post

    Best wishes!


    Quote Originally Posted by nanook View Post
    i dont know you but i think i like you, like when i look at your pictures, and what i see is sensitivity, and by sensitivity i mean the trait of being permeable to all parts of one self, meaning the so called shadow. its a great trait, don't just look at the negative sides, but its hard to handle, for sensitive people of other types it's just the same.
    You see sensitivity, really? I am cold and distant. I am not a huggy-feely kind of person, gosh, i am even afraid of people touching me. I think i may be paying to much attention to other people and what they think.

    Quote Originally Posted by nanook View Post
    i know a guy who looks somehow like you and he does not know his type (why ??? probably a symptom of him being enneagram nine) but he says he thinks he might be an introverted perceiver. he is odd in many ways and i cant type him either.
    Can't win them all

    Quote Originally Posted by EJCC View Post
    I dunno, Saslou. I've noticed with me that the type I act like depends on the situation I'm in, so maybe, since ESxJs are really adaptable and really good at modelling behavior, you've started to act a bit INTP? For example, when I'm in a silly mood or around silly people, or feel the need to be silly in order to keep the conversation going, my Ne gets a lot stronger, making me seem ENFP-ish. And when I'm in a terrible mood, I can be pretty emo/INFP.

    I dunno. I'm rambling too... wish I could be more helpful, lol

    Edit: To reassure you, I'll say that I'm 99% sure that you're ESFJ. I've told you this before (I think? maybe?), but in your video, you remind me a whole lot of (a British version of) an ESFJ friend of mine.
    No way in heck you're INTP, lol
    I do know i adapt to situations. Where only logic is required i excel, where i have to show compassion or empathy, i can do that .. Just don't hug me. Maybe you are right, maybe i am just good at shifting from type to type.

    confuses the hell out me though. Thank you for your reply
    “I made you take time to look at what I saw and when you took time to really notice my flower, you hung all your associations with flowers on my flower and you write about my flower as if I think and see what you think and see—and I don't.”
    ― Georgia O'Keeffe

  10. #10
    a scream in a vortex nanook's Avatar
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    haha, i would never associate the term sensitivity with huggy-feely. (especially in context of strangers)

    being permeable to your self equals being permeable to other people. other people's nature creates a resonance in your shadow, so when they curse you from their standpoint and you are sensitive it feels like god is cursing you. every time, even if its a stranger on the internet. (that is: only if someone truly talks to your shadow). and if you can open up to your shadow, its message becomes less literal and concrete, less like what the person said, and then you can digest it and it can help you. and if you can't create that open (irrational) mental space that allows for such translation/conversion, then its just fucking terrifying and you wish you were insensitive and could just recject those voices all together. but sensitive people dont have a choice. and if they are extroverted, they won't behave as extroverted as others do.

    there are positive aspects of being permeable, but somehow the negative ones might be more reliable for diagnosis. its not something someone would make up. even though it can be confused with other troubles.

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