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Thread: BULLYING: Personality type with a tendency to bully others? Type of the victims?

  1. #111
    XES Array 5231311252's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by neptunesnet View Post
    EDIT: Now that I think about it, Te- and Fe-doms tried to boss me around, and I let them think they were in control, up until they crossed a boundary, at which point I usually bit back with words and set them straight. No harm done in the end.

    This is basically it, except I did have bullying tendencies as a child.
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  2. #112
    Senior Member Array guesswho's Avatar
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    Almost any type can bully. I made fun of a retarded girl, well actually she wasn't retarded...she was a highschool snitch. Sometimes I remember and I regret it.

    I was bullied a lot after I broke my leg when I was a little kid. It was always something cool to make fun of the guy with the limp.

    Then I grew up and bullied the bullies. Makes sense to me.
    The narcissist and a little sadist one were my favorites.

    I can't stand it ...if I see some kid get bullied on the street...I go and help him. I pretty much relate to that.

  3. #113

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    Quote Originally Posted by ZPowers View Post
    You hear this a lot, but research doesn't support it. Studies have shown that bullies, people who perpetrate domestic abuse, and other overly-aggressive people have above average self-esteem / feel like they're better than other people.
    That means we need some good-old fashion crab/tall-poppy mentality to use against those kinds of folks and tear them down; piece by piece, the way Slayer prescribes it! The bullies and abusers deserve every ounce of that medicine!

  4. #114
    Senior Member Array Lark's Avatar
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    Its funny, the one time in my life that I engaged in behaviour which could be considered bullying, it did involve intimidation and terror of people I didnt like, I had a pretty sophisticated reasoning for behaving that way and the people who where my target did quite a bit to prove themselves a legit target, they where anti-social and scumbags pretty much.

    I even fought with some of the harder elements which where pretty peripheral to my world but which their worlds intersected with, until it became too much, I remember the final fight, one of their asshole "champions" who used to beat on them as much as anyone else and who'd been involved in breaking and entering, intimidation of local girls who where in fear of him possibly becoming a rapist or something, he was too big and too strong for me to defeat.

    Also, I had matured and totally changed social scene by that stage, I met lots of good people who didnt resolve disagrements with violence, who wherent cruel or interested in tearing people down for their own amusement. I knew that like a snake sheds its skin I'd changed from my formerly tougher, desensitised self, on a conscious and unconscious level I wasnt prepared to return to my earlier self to see off this one opponent.

    Times where difficult for a while after that but the guy moved away, I've heard since he's still a thug, responsible for a lot of scum bag behaviour and likely will end up on the authorities radar, I know he's not forgotten about me and bares a grudge. Years after that incident I saw him in a train station and he pretty much humiliated a conductor but in a bizarre way it was like a challenge to me, pretty sure that was his motivation.

    I can testify that if you're in the position of being a bully that there's two things which are true, you could experience an elevated sense of esteem, its because you're not afraid of anyone or anything, but its not the same as esteem because you feel something particularly good about yourself or you've accomplished something.

    The other thing is that most bullies have been bullied themselves or are being bullied, Eric Fromm's authoritarian personality perfectly describes bullies, the kiss up and piss down mentality, they'll always have a higher authority that they are kow towing to and subordinates they'll despise. I'd experienced bullying and decided that on my own patch I'd not endure it, so I fought and over came my opponents but it called for a perpetual struggle that would have locked me into sort of personality structure I didnt want.

  5. #115
    Senior Member Array Saslou's Avatar
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    I am not sure there is one particular type but one has to look at (external)conditions that's making the person bully others.

    I was bullied in primary school. One day the girl liked me, the next she was being mean. It was awful, like constantly treading on egg shells.

    In secondary school my best friend turned against me and her and her new friends bullied me to the point i asked to move classes.

    I did on one occasion bully a girl .. I was bored in science so starting throwing pencils at her head, she left the class crying and someone asked why .. That girl then found me and gave me a shit kicking .. I deserved it.

    Mainly i jumped in for my friends when they were being bullied, some girl in the next year up who was built like a shit brick house and always mouthing off didn't like my best friend and decided one day to piss me off .. Sad thing was even though she was a mouthy so and so, it was her friend who jumped in and started pulling my hair .. Big mistake as i'm going to defend myself .. I don't pull hair, i use my fists .. But hey, don't fuck with my friends.
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  6. #116
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    Quote Originally Posted by saslou View Post

    I was bullied in primary school. One day the girl liked me, the next she was being mean. It was awful, like constantly treading on egg shells.
    Haha, happened to me. One day this girl asked me to sit with her on the bus and I turned her down, from then on she pretty much physically harassed me on a daily basis.

  7. #117
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    Curious no one's mentioned the ENFP. We don't get bulled -- and we don't bully?

    Actually, I was bullied throughout school. Verbally, from boys and girls, but mostly boys. I still can't look any of them in the face; I feel weird about it.

    It's easy to offend an ENFP like me. I was very sensitive and took things badly. Also, I was weird, so though I loved being around people I wasn't given many opportunities to do so. I retreated a lot -- it was painful because, again, I like people -- and picked up a ferocious reading habit. It's how I survived. I think I became a lot smarter and better for the thousands of books that I read, but I remember the loneliness sometimes, and it hurts.

    Thankfully this changed once I left high school and in college I had more friends than I knew what to do with.

  8. #118
    facettes de la petite mor Array Words of Ivory's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sky is BLUE! View Post
    If you don't stand up for yourself and succumb to bullying without doing something, then yes, I'd say it is unhealty. There is always something that can be done.
    Complete bollocks. I spend my entire youth standing up for myself against severe and constant bullying, and it never did a damn lick of help for me. This contrived and constantly spouted "if you stand up for yourself, people won't harass you" idea is... to put it bluntly... utter bullshit.

    I think there are certain types that can be emotionally insensitive (no need to open that can of worms by airing what types I think those are) but I don't think there's any type that is more or less disposed towards being bullied or being a bully than another.

    That sort of thing is entirely independent of personality types. Personality types do no define who you are, just how you process things.

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  9. #119

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    Quote Originally Posted by duck! View Post
    Curious no one's mentioned the ENFP. We don't get bulled -- and we don't bully?

    Actually, I was bullied throughout school. Verbally, from boys and girls, but mostly boys. I still can't look any of them in the face; I feel weird about it.

    It's easy to offend an ENFP like me. I was very sensitive and took things badly. Also, I was weird, so though I loved being around people I wasn't given many opportunities to do so. I retreated a lot -- it was painful because, again, I like people -- and picked up a ferocious reading habit. It's how I survived. I think I became a lot smarter and better for the thousands of books that I read, but I remember the loneliness sometimes, and it hurts.

    Thankfully this changed once I left high school and in college I had more friends than I knew what to do with.
    Wow thats unbelievable familiar to me. Fortunetely for me it stopped after elementary when people started to appreciate the way ENFPs are a little more as opposed to being hostile to it. But it is sad looking back on those times and im sorry you had them too

  10. #120
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    Quote Originally Posted by Words of Ivory View Post
    Complete bollocks. I spend my entire youth standing up for myself against severe and constant bullying, and it never did a damn lick of help for me. This contrived and constantly spouted i "if you stand up for yourself, people won't harass you" is... to put it bluntly... utter bullshit.

    I think there are certain types that can be emotionally insensitive (no need to open that can of worms by airing what types I think those are) but I don't think there's any types that is more or less disposed towards being bullied or being a bully.

    That sort of thing is entirely independent of personality types. Personality types do no define who you are, just how you process things.
    *applause*

    Entirely right. It might be chic to say that you're "above" bullying, but in some places it was pretty close to impossible to avoid it, was a constant reality. It's above and beyond personality type. Some of it was just abject and random cruelty.

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