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Thread: Pretentious Fi

  1. #481
    The High Priestess Amargith's Avatar
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    Ahh but the rewards of taking that jump...ask adrenaline junkies...it's awesome
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  2. #482
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    As I understand it, Fi is mostly about forming one's own opinion (and perhaps projecting it or pushing it on others), whereas Ne is more about actually noticing other people.

    For example, Personalitypage.com says that if a given INFP is too Fi-focused, he'll be self-centered and oblivious to the people around him. To get more balance in life, he needs to consciously develop his Ne by paying more notice to the people around him. See the section entitled "Potential Problem Areas" at http://www.personalitypage.com/html/INFP_per.html

    Personally as an INFP, when I walk in a room I don't even really notice the mood of the people there. I'm one of those self-centered Fi-focused people with kind of weak Ne: When I walk into a room I'm mainly thinking in terms of what I want to achieve in that room. If it even occurs to me to notice the mood of the other people in the room, then I really have to tune in my Ne and pay attention, like tuning in a radio station on the radio.

    IMO, the only place where Fi gives me any real psychological insight into others is when they describe a problem and ask for advice. Having spent a lifetime rummaging around in my own head, I like to think that I'm a bit of an amateur psychologist and can project my own experience out onto others. So I'm quick to offer advice based on quick exploration of a personal problem or situation. And actually I'm not all that bad at it.

    But in fairness to the other person, I do try to keep in mind that what I'm doing is essentially projection of my own situation onto another person, i.e., I'm very good at putting myself in other people's shoes. However, frequently new information emerges in the exchange of information which forces me to change my diagnosis and my advice. That again indicates to me again that my Fi is largely projection and prediction rather than any particular ability to actually "read" the other person. (Again, that latter skill would belong to Ne, which I'm actually kind of weak at.)

    Just my opinion, of course. I don't pretend to be an expert on this stuff.

  3. #483
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    The way I experience it is that when Fi is overstretched I withdraw from life, action and participation. I get selfish in a way that whilst I do see and care for others, I'd rather be by myself and ponder about inner life, values, beauty or just plain nonsense. Getting through the day with heavy boots on.
    When Se is in tune with Fi, I feel more outgoing and active, helping others precisely the way they like it and I see everything bright around me especially in terms of beautiful things, places, colors etc. The Se is giving me the energy.
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  4. #484
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    Quote Originally Posted by esfpmary View Post
    Getting through the day with heavy boots on.
    I like it! That's a great way of expressing it!

  5. #485
    As Long As It Takes.... Redbone's Avatar
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    I've seen this in two people I know--an ENTJ and ESTJ. The ESTJ was particularly insistent about telling me how I felt or my ex instead of actually listening to me. It burned me up (besides, it was inaccurate) and I wouldn't hesitate to correct. Sometimes we'd both get hung up on this and the conversation couldn't continue.
    The ENTJ is more open to accepting something but only with sufficient "evidence". ESTJ sticks with opinion most often instead of accepting the "evidence".

  6. #486
    As Long As It Takes.... Redbone's Avatar
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    I've seen this in two people I know--an ENTJ and ESTJ. The ESTJ was particularly insistent about telling me how I felt or my ex instead of actually listening to me. It burned me up (besides, it was inaccurate) and I wouldn't hesitate to correct. Sometimes we'd both get hung up on this and the conversation couldn't continue.
    The ENTJ is more open to accepting something but only with sufficient "evidence". ESTJ sticks with opinion most often instead of accepting the "evidence".

  7. #487
    Member 1AuroraAngel1's Avatar
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    I have a very strong Fi and I frequently try to guess how other people are feeling, but since many people think that "Fi=annoying," I just keep my observations to myself.

  8. #488
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    Fe users can irritate me just as much, when they say "OMG I feel your pain" et cetera when they've only just met me and want to connect emotionally before I know anything about them. It's disconcerting. You cannot truly care about someone before until you know that person as an individual rather than as some random who has X issue. Fi is honest. Granted, too much Fi can lead to idealism and irrational views (INFPs suffer from this, especially) but it's not any worse than high Fe.

    I believe in balance, a healthy body achieves balance/symmetry:

  9. #489
    Glamour puss with a tan Raffaella's Avatar
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    Not pretentious in understanding of people but reeking off contempt and exceedingly arrogant toward anything below them or their values.

    I've had many Ti-doms call me out for it which is why I'm more humble these days however some IxFP E4s are the biggest perpetrators.
    Night is another candle

  10. #490
    alchemist Legion's Avatar
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    Does anybody feel like strong Fi users are really pretentious when it comes to understanding emotions? It seems like Fi people constantly think they know how other people are feeling but are wrong many times. In my experience, Fi users seem to feel the overwhelming urge to convince me that I'm feeling a certain way. It can be kind of annoying at times, but maybe it's some times helpful?
    YES.

    That is all.

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