Things I can do to work on Fi?

[raz]

I've been working on my Fi for the last like, 9 months....a lot. I've been spending massive amounts of time under a lot of self-analysis. I've been constantly asking myself how I personally feel about things, why I perform a certain action, why something is important to me, understanding emotional attachments to others and the influence they have on my actions. And, I've made a lot progress. I really understand myself a lot more. It really made me come to terms with my Te-ness.

After analyzing my own personal views on the simplest of subjects, I realized a lot of my most basic viewpoints on the world were based on perceptions and judgments created by Si and Te working in unison. It scared me, honestly, because I started telling myself that I viewed the world in some cold ways, and I kept trying to console myself into accepting it because that was how *I* perceived the world, not others.

After all this, though, the self-analysis just keeps going, and I started to realize that it's just...hard to turn off. It gets exhausting, and even though every second of it is vitally important and exhilarating, it can be distracting. It made me wonder....are there things I can go do that are more tangible...like, activities, as a softer way to work on Fi? I was thinking, maybe I should find something to go do that would make me consistently ask myself and voice my own personal opinions. I'm thinking stress voice, because maybe I'm at the point where I need to take this analysis and turn it into more...action, but with baby steps?

Any suggestions?

 

[BlackCat]

It sounds like you're doing what is necessary to develop Fi, but it seems like it may be overwhelming you.

Now you know what I'm always doing, but it's just natural to me.

As for activities, I dunno, I think I remember you mentioning doing things just because you wanted to over the "rational" thing to do, like taking the long way because it has better scenery etc (not like making really bad decisions based on emotions in your life). Do things for yourself in the day rather than just stick to the same old boring routine.

And if you really want to get in depth, try to think of what other people's emotional attachments are, what connections that two people have (are they friend? foe? etc, except for me it's more details and not black and white), and perhaps how other people effect others besides yourself.

But that might make your head explode... That's going into Ne territory I think.

But it sounds like you've really got a good handle on it yourself right now.

 

[Thalassa]

Start keeping an on-line journal. Put in there whatever "feels right" to you - words, pictures, music, videos. Go on feeling. Don't be too rational. And it should be more restful than constantly psychoanalyzing yourself. Believe me, I know that can get old.

 

[raz]

I keep trying to get myself to do that, but I just....can't...keep...a journal, omg. I can write out my thoughts endlessly in a forum, but when it comes to trying to write a journal, it opens up this level of vulnerability that is so overwhelming that I just shut off immediately.

Something extra weird happened tonight at work as I was leaving. It was so unexpected even though I'm constantly Fi-ing lately. There's this INFJ that's a supervisor at the store I work with. I've become quite infatuated with her over the last like...year. She's too old for me and has a boyfriend. It doesn't stop me from developing feelings for her. I keep wanting to just talk to her, and I've ended up developing a friendship with her that I really like.

However, in the last month, I switched departments. A few weeks later, she was switched to be the supervisor of the department *I* switched into. What luck! So, lately, we've been spending a lot of time together working. There's just a lot more friendliness involved in the work compared to when I worked in another department for an ESFJ that I barely cared about. The problem tonight started when I started thinking about the dynamic between me and her and how it's affecting the job. I know she's an INFJ, so that plays into it a bit, but I started to wonder if I get away with more things because she's more of a friend. I didn't know if that was actually happening.

However, when I thought about that, suddenly even though I worked my ass off, it was like, knowing that something like that *could* happen suddenly devalued the work immensely. It's like, suddenly a personal relationship has been interjected into the work, and even though I'm meeting my job requirements, that relationship is making the actual work itself mean less to me as a person. I thought about that as I walked out, and I kept asking myself over and over, "Because of my relationship with her while I work, the work is suddenly devalued? How?" It was like...something that just popped into my head, but it was more of a feeling that was given words.

It's just all so confusing. :/ This is why I wish I could find a way to give it a break without missing any important lessons I could be learning from it.

 

[Thalassa]

I keep trying to get myself to do that, but I just....can't...keep...a journal, omg. I can write out my thoughts endlessly in a forum, but when it comes to trying to write a journal, it opens up this level of vulnerability that is so overwhelming that I just shut off immediately.

Something extra weird happened tonight at work as I was leaving. It was so unexpected even though I'm constantly Fi-ing lately. There's this INFJ that's a supervisor at the store I work with. I've become quite infatuated with her over the last like...year. She's too old for me and has a boyfriend. It doesn't stop me from developing feelings for her. I keep wanting to just talk to her, and I've ended up developing a friendship with her that I really like.

However, in the last month, I switched departments. A few weeks later, she was switched to be the supervisor of the department *I* switched into. What luck! So, lately, we've been spending a lot of time together working. There's just a lot more friendliness involved in the work compared to when I worked in another department for an ESFJ that I barely cared about. The problem tonight started when I started thinking about the dynamic between me and her and how it's affecting the job. I know she's an INFJ, so that plays into it a bit, but I started to wonder if I get away with more things because she's more of a friend. I didn't know if that was actually happening.

However, when I thought about that, suddenly even though I worked my ass off, it was like, knowing that something like that *could* happen suddenly devalued the work immensely. It's like, suddenly a personal relationship has been interjected into the work, and even though I'm meeting my job requirements, that relationship is making the actual work itself mean less to me as a person. I thought about that as I walked out, and I kept asking myself over and over, "Because of my relationship with her while I work, the work is suddenly devalued? How?" It was like...something that just popped into my head, but it was more of a feeling that was given words.

It's just all so confusing. :/ This is why I wish I could find a way to give it a break without missing any important lessons I could be learning from it.

If writing or drawing is a problem for you, just do it collage style: collect other things that are meaningful. "Cut and paste" pictures that strike you on an emotional level, because they just do, or seem to emanate meaning that you do not have to feel pressured to analyze. Fi is not always about analyzing yourself. Same with music or music videos. You could also collect other people's words - quotes, poems - but you don't have to. Stick with an audio-visual element. Just allow yourself to feel and to be. If you want to, you can go back and analyze your collection later if you want to. But for now, just go with what feels right, what you're drawn to. It's more or less creating a collage of "found art" that you never have to show anyone else.

 

[Venom]

I've been working on my Fi for the last like, 9 months....a lot. I've been spending massive amounts of time under a lot of self-analysis. I've been constantly asking myself how I personally feel about things, why I perform a certain action, why something is important to me, understanding emotional attachments to others and the influence they have on my actions. And, I've made a lot progress. I really understand myself a lot more. It really made me come to terms with my Te-ness.

After analyzing my own personal views on the simplest of subjects, I realized a lot of my most basic viewpoints on the world were based on perceptions and judgments created by Si and Te working in unison. It scared me, honestly, because I started telling myself that I viewed the world in some cold ways, and I kept trying to console myself into accepting it because that was how *I* perceived the world, not others.

After all this, though, the self-analysis just keeps going, and I started to realize that it's just...hard to turn off. It gets exhausting, and even though every second of it is vitally important and exhilarating, it can be distracting. It made me wonder....are there things I can go do that are more tangible...like, activities, as a softer way to work on Fi? I was thinking, maybe I should find something to go do that would make me consistently ask myself and voice my own personal opinions. I'm thinking stress voice, because maybe I'm at the point where I need to take this analysis and turn it into more...action, but with baby steps?

Any suggestions?

Fi is pure evil. Fi is the lack of any other judging function, rather than the positive existance of another.

It almost sounds like you are purposely trying to make yourself over analyze things and become depressed? Dude, Fi is #1 in depression for a reason. I'd stay FAR away from Fi if I were you.

 

[Ginkgo]

Fi is pure evil. Fi is the lack of any other judging function, rather than the positive existance of another.

It almost sounds like you are purposely trying to make yourself over analyze things and become depressed? Dude, Fi is #1 in depression for a reason. I'd stay FAR away from Fi if I were you.

Dear Babylon Candle,

You are a very nice person, but stop trying to impose your agenda on everyone! It's wrong.

-Sincerely, Fi

 

[Amargith]

Bab, chill, I know Fi is daunting, a wild horse, but that sort of challenge should appeal to you

Raz, the benefit of collecting things that give you a good vibe and revisiting them later is that you're channeling Fi through Si, something you're very comfortable with. It'll also allow for more digestion of those feelings, coz you'll be reexperiencing something familiar, giving you ample time to 'practise' and refine. Try it out, it might just give you the peace you need, and you'll find also that sometimes you make 'new' discoveries, things you've missed the first time because it's all so overwhelming and you missed things while struggling.

The other thing I do is imbed Fi in Te. I'll pick a very meditative Te activity such as crafting jewelry, doing the dishes, cutting up vegetables, whatever needs doing and sit down comfortably for it, put no deadline on it and let the self-reflection come to me while executing it. This too will give you the chance to discover yourself.

One thing I've noticed is that you're sorta overwhelmed because you're struggling. I realize that Fi pops up at the most *inconvenient* times, but realize that you do not *have* to judge it right there and then. Just experience, ride the wave of emotion it causes in you and realize that it is ok to just do that. There is no right or wrong. An emotion cannot be wrong. It is the reaction to that emotion that makes all the difference. By postponing your reaction to it, and merely observing the emotion while wondering all sorts of questions, you'll save yourself a lot of stress. You'll feel less at the mercy of the waves it causes. If you give yourself enough time to digest it all, for that matter, for the self-reflection to run its course before you start judging what you can do with this new insight, you'll be less exhausted, I promise

 

[Jeffster]

I still disagree with the idea that these functions are something to "work on." At least no more than in the sense that just living your life naturally "works on" whatever needs to be.

 

[Ginkgo]

I still disagree with the idea that these functions are something to "work on." At least no more than in the sense that just living your life naturally "works on" whatever needs to be.

What you are implying is that one cannot improve upon one's own mental state. You are also saying that one cannot learn, as if conscious self improvement is unnatural.

Furthermore, you have not provided sufficient evidence for your stance.

 

[Thalassa]

Dear Babylon Candle,

You are a very nice person, but stop trying to impose your agenda on everyone! It's wrong.

-Sincerely, Fi

Babylon Candle is not a nice person, nor a particularly objective person for that matter.

My Fi says so.

 

[Venom]

Babylon Candle is not a nice person, nor a particularly objective person for that matter.

My Fi says so.

Bab, chill, I know Fi is daunting, a wild horse, but that sort of challenge should appeal to you

Raz, the benefit of collecting things that give you a good vibe and revisiting them later is that you're channeling Fi through Si, something you're very comfortable with. It'll also allow for more digestion of those feelings, coz you'll be reexperiencing something familiar, giving you ample time to 'practise' and refine. Try it out, it might just give you the peace you need, and you'll find also that sometimes you make 'new' discoveries, things you've missed the first time because it's all so overwhelming and you missed things while struggling.

The other thing I do is imbed Fi in Te. I'll pick a very meditative Te activity such as crafting jewelry, doing the dishes, cutting up vegetables, whatever needs doing and sit down comfortably for it, put no deadline on it and let the self-reflection come to me while executing it. This too will give you the chance to discover yourself.

One thing I've noticed is that you're sorta overwhelmed because you're struggling. I realize that Fi pops up at the most *inconvenient* times, but realize that you do not *have* to judge it right there and then. Just experience, ride the wave of emotion it causes in you and realize that it is ok to just do that. There is no right or wrong. An emotion cannot be wrong. It is the reaction to that emotion that makes all the difference. By postponing your reaction to it, and merely observing the emotion while wondering all sorts of questions, you'll save yourself a lot of stress. You'll feel less at the mercy of the waves it causes. If you give yourself enough time to digest it all, for that matter, for the self-reflection to run its course before you start judging what you can do with this new insight, you'll be less exhausted, I promise

Dear Babylon Candle,

You are a very nice person, but stop trying to impose your agenda on everyone! It's wrong.

-Sincerely, Fi

Dear....the world,

you're all very lucky that I have no Fi. Otherwise It'd tell you all how much he HATES you for no reason at all .

-Sincerely, Fi hijacking Te



no but seriously. Fi is the bane of my existance and I see no benefit to improving it. Ni improvement is much more beneficial and I'd imagine the ISTJ would benefit more from Ne improvement.

 

[Thalassa]

Dear....the world,

you're all very lucky that I have no Fi. Otherwise It'd tell you all how much he HATES you for no reason at all .

-Sincerely, Fi hijacking Te



no but seriously. Fi is the bane of my existance and I see no benefit to improving it. Ni improvement is much more beneficial and I'd imagine the ISTJ would benefit more from Ne improvement.

But...no one asked for your random assessment of the matter.:hi: The thread is about how he can work on Fi, not how he can be bullied by misguided Te.

And the fact that you're making this about you smacks of Fi, ironically.

 

[Venom]

But...no one asked for your random assessment of the matter.:hi: The thread is about how he can work on Fi, not how he can be bullied by misguided Te.

And the fact that you're making this about you smacks of Fi, ironically.

Dear Marmalade,

I serve no master!

sincerely,
Irony

 

[Amargith]

Bab, you gotto admit, it's kinda ironic to see your Fi mistrusting itself and any Fi around

 

[raz]

Well, this ISTJ would like to step in and tell you to stop derailing the thread with pointless banter.

 

[BlackCat]

Fi is pure evil. Fi is the lack of any other judging function, rather than the positive existance of another.

It almost sounds like you are purposely trying to make yourself over analyze things and become depressed? Dude, Fi is #1 in depression for a reason. I'd stay FAR away from Fi if I were you.

No one cares about your opinion.

As for raz, what are you going to try to "do" to develop Fi (as in an action)? Anything in this thread sound good?

 

[raz]

I'm not entirely sure yet. It seems the collage idea might work, but why is it so hard to get myself to do it? It just seems so...pointless. I don't mean pointless in the sense that it will help me, it's that the activity in itself seems so pointless and empty. It's just like, time spent doing something that does nothing but to serve sheer self-reflection, and accomplishes nothing else. That's what keeps me from wanting to do it, because it seems so empty like that. I feel like if I did something like that, it'd tear apart my very being because it goes against all of the rules of my life. I guess Te doesn't like it...at all.

 

[Jeffster]

What you are implying is that one cannot improve upon one's own mental state. You are also saying that one cannot learn, as if conscious self improvement is unnatural.

I did NOT say one cannot learn. You don't read very well, do you? Of course someone can improve upon their "mental state," but the approach will vary greatly by the individual, and I think approaching it from a "work on a function" angle is pretty silly. But, hey, if it floats your boat, knock yourself out, I was just stating my view on it.

Furthermore, you have not provided sufficient evidence for your stance.

There's no evidence for any of this crap. The "functions" themselves are just theoretical speculation. Go ahead and show me some "evidence" that somebody improved themselves by "working on" a theoretical function. I don't think you can do that.

 

[NewEra]

I also agree that it's not something you should work on - that's my opinion. For me recently, I've just been thinking about what things are important to stand up for in life. Fi has naturally taken hold in me in the past year or so. It's not something I ever thought of before.