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  1. #1
    Senior Member Yloh's Avatar
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    Lightbulb Love and hate on the outside and inside.

    So, I was minding my own business and an interesting question came up.

    Certian MBTI types tend to be more liked on the outside, while other MBTI types tend to be more hated on the outside.

    While these types may be liked or hated on the outside, what about the on the inside (behind the backs of people)?

    Do certin types have more love on the outside but hated behind their backs? Same goes for the hate on the outside and admired behind their backs.

    If this is true, then which type seems to have the most love on the outside?
    Which type seems to have the most hate on the outside?
    Which type seems to have the most love behind their backs?
    Finally, which type seems to have the most hate behind their backs?

    I don't think there is another thread on this question. I only looked breafley.

  2. #2
    Senior Member Yloh's Avatar
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    I know it is a rather silly question and there are a lot more factors that play along in this, but I find it pretty interesting.

  3. #3
    Senior Member NewEra's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Yloh View Post
    So, I was minding my own business and an interesting question came up.

    Certian MBTI types tend to be more liked on the outside, while other MBTI types tend to be more hated on the outside.

    While these types may be liked or hated on the outside, what about the on the inside (behind the backs of people)?

    Do certin types have more love on the outside but hated behind their backs? Same goes for the hate on the outside and admired behind their backs.

    If this is true, then which type seems to have the most love on the outside?
    Which type seems to have the most hate on the outside?
    Which type seems to have the most love behind their backs?
    Finally, which type seems to have the most hate behind their backs?

    I don't think there is another thread on this question. I only looked breafley.
    I don't exactly know what you mean by loved and hated on 'the inside' and 'the outside'? I'm a little confused here.

  4. #4
    darkened dreams labyrinthine's Avatar
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    I think the answer might be different depending on the environment. Contexts where people are socially aware of MBTI will tend to have certain types emerge as dominant just as occurs in every social dynamic. This can also happen in environments that don't use MBTI terminology, but where certain behavioral traits are preferred and so those who possess those traits (or can appear to) have social power and those who can't demonstrate the traits have less social power.

    People tend to hide their favor or disfavor of others if fear is some kind of factor. If the person is especially socially dominant, then others will hesitate to express disfavor and in some cases could be afraid to compliment. Also, if there are internal personal values held in the group that do not result in immediate social power, then individuals with those qualities might be admired, but the favor goes unspoken because the personal value is in conflict with the immediate way to gain social power.

    I'm not certain of these ideas, but those are a few thoughts that came to mind.
    Step into my metaphysical room of mirrors.
    Fear of reality creates myopic morality
    So I guess it means there is trouble until the robins come
    (from Blue Velvet)

  5. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by TheChosenOne View Post
    I don't exactly know what you mean by loved and hated on 'the inside' and 'the outside'? I'm a little confused here.
    I think its that some people are nice to somones face and talk about them behind there back. Or it seems like someone hates you, but you find out they think the world of you behind your back.

    I agree that fear drives alot of this. Fear of being hurt, fear of losing something, fear of being found out, just fear in general, not always an intimidating fear.

  6. #6
    Senior Member Yloh's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by TheChosenOne View Post
    I don't exactly know what you mean by loved and hated on 'the inside' and 'the outside'? I'm a little confused here.
    Let me give you an example of what I'm trying to say.

    At least for me, people who are thinkers seem to give off a negative vibe to me. This is because they just tell you how it is and they can appear to be jerks. An EXTJ would let you know when you did something stupid, broke the rules, were late, and other tedious stuff like that without any sympothy. In public, people can see this kind of additude as "This person is a jerk" and either avoid them, argue with them, or show a negative additude towards that person. That is what I mean by receiving hate on the outside. On the other side of that coin, I see that exact same person and think to myself "This person gets things done, this person isn't afraid to tell me the truth, and this person is proactive". I don't tell that person how I admire them, but I really do. That is what I mean by receving love on the inside.

    Here is another example, people who are feelers seem to always give out a positive vibe to others. They show that they care, are always nice, and avoid conflict. XXFP's are good at molding themselves to bring peace and harmony to the enviroment. People will see this kind of additude as "This person is really nice to have around" and will show that same kindness back. Feelers will receive love on the outside because others will show kindness to them. One the other side of that coin, those same people can think of feelers as "fake, unstable, and reactive". Those same people can have negative feelings towards this additude, but might not let that person know how they truly feel. The feeler is receving hate on the inside because others will have negative emotions on the inside, but they will never bring them out.

    I hope this makes since. I really don't know very much about MBTI and enjoy reading responces from people who have put more time and effort in learning MBTI. I also love hearing from those who have more experience in life.

    I know everything is situational and maturity level plays a HUGE role, but certin personalitiy types do tend to get more praise on the outside, while other personality types tend to get more criticism on the outside. Other personality types get more praise behind their backs, while other personality types get more criticism behind their backs.

    Now that I think about it, some personality types just give more praise on the outside and harbor critisisim on the inside, while other personality types give more criticisim on the outside and harbor praise on the the inside.

    So, what do you think?

  7. #7
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    The example you give seems to divide J/P down the middle instead of T vs F.

  8. #8
    Senior Member NewEra's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by poki View Post
    I think its that some people are nice to somones face and talk about them behind there back. Or it seems like someone hates you, but you find out they think the world of you behind your back.

    I agree that fear drives alot of this. Fear of being hurt, fear of losing something, fear of being found out, just fear in general, not always an intimidating fear.

    Quote Originally Posted by Yloh View Post
    Let me give you an example of what I'm trying to say.

    At least for me, people who are thinkers seem to give off a negative vibe to me. This is because they just tell you how it is and they can appear to be jerks. An EXTJ would let you know when you did something stupid, broke the rules, were late, and other tedious stuff like that without any sympothy. In public, people can see this kind of additude as "This person is a jerk" and either avoid them, argue with them, or show a negative additude towards that person. That is what I mean by receiving hate on the outside. On the other side of that coin, I see that exact same person and think to myself "This person gets things done, this person isn't afraid to tell me the truth, and this person is proactive". I don't tell that person how I admire them, but I really do. That is what I mean by receving love on the inside.

    Here is another example, people who are feelers seem to always give out a positive vibe to others. They show that they care, are always nice, and avoid conflict. XXFP's are good at molding themselves to bring peace and harmony to the enviroment. People will see this kind of additude as "This person is really nice to have around" and will show that same kindness back. Feelers will receive love on the outside because others will show kindness to them. One the other side of that coin, those same people can think of feelers as "fake, unstable, and reactive". Those same people can have negative feelings towards this additude, but might not let that person know how they truly feel. The feeler is receving hate on the inside because others will have negative emotions on the inside, but they will never bring them out.

    I hope this makes since. I really don't know very much about MBTI and enjoy reading responces from people who have put more time and effort in learning MBTI. I also love hearing from those who have more experience in life.

    I know everything is situational and maturity level plays a HUGE role, but certin personalitiy types do tend to get more praise on the outside, while other personality types tend to get more criticism on the outside. Other personality types get more praise behind their backs, while other personality types get more criticism behind their backs.

    Now that I think about it, some personality types just give more praise on the outside and harbor critisisim on the inside, while other personality types give more criticisim on the outside and harbor praise on the the inside.

    So, what do you think?
    Oh I see. Thanks for the explanations, you two.

    Well, like you said the ExTJ's will probably get the most hate on the outside, yet the most love on the inside (people usually respect them and their type is the model type, at least for males).

    I don't know if "hated" or "loved" are the right words, but I'll go with them for now...

    Hated on the outside, loved on the inside:
    ENTJ
    ENTP
    ESTJ
    ESTP

    Loved on the outside, hated on the inside:
    INFJ
    INFP
    ISFJ
    ISFP

  9. #9
    Senior Member Yloh's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by poki View Post
    The example you give seems to divide J/P down the middle instead of T vs F.

    How so?

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by Yloh View Post
    How so?
    The examples was more about being moldable vs take control. Atleast thats how it seemed to me. FPs are moldable with emotions, but TPs are moldable with thought. J types are more take control and are about getting the job done and they will worry about who they stepped on later.

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