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  1. #21
    4x9 cascadeco's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Strawberrylover View Post
    That's very interesting.

    Is this something you do on a regular basis or is it more like experience experience experience --> reflect reflect reflect? How do you know which areas of your psyche to target?

    I'm getting some introvert envy from this thread. It sounds like you Ni folks seem to know yourself so much better.
    Well, I think it will vary amongst INFJ's - well, amongst all Ni doms - based on personal motivation, values, priorities, etc. As we all probably have our own unique definitions/views of self-growth, and what that means for us.

    For myself, I've always been very big on Balance. I'll bring mbti terms/cognitive functions into this, just because it's easier to illustrate.

    I see value in all 8 cognitive functions, and I do not view it as 'healthy' for me to lie too heavily, or be too overly focused, on any one. Now obviously I have my preferences, and I'll always use some more than others, but I don't hold any one function above any other, and I don't hold one as the epitome and cast others off into the shadows. Now I'm going to wax philosophical here, but I think each can provide a certain facet, a certain window, into existence, and into life.

    So, I embrace sensory experiences, because I think they can make me a richer, more balanced individual. If I feel I'm going too far in that direction, or more likely, if I notice other aspects of myself falling by the wayside, I'll pull back, and I may reflect for a while. I might buy a book of logic puzzles because I decide my brain is becoming jello and I need to keep myself, and my analytical capabilities, as sharp as possible. I might decide I've been sitting still too long, and have become complacent with my life, so I need to shake things up and do new things. It's more intuitive, I suppose...but for myself, it's always that key word of 'Balance' that's in the forefront -- never going too far in any one direction, trying to balance my life out, and all aspects of the human condition, and not fall too far on one side so that I'm missing out or disregarding another.
    "...On and on and on and on he strode, far out over the sands, singing wildly to the sea, crying to greet the advent of the life that had cried to him." - James Joyce

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  2. #22
    The High Priestess Amargith's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Strawberrylover View Post
    Hmm, I'm wondering whether ENFPs and INFJs grow similarly, but just look at it from the opposite directions? Allow me to explain using a somewhat old, somewhat obnoxious movie.

    Remember that feather that floats in the air in the beginning and end of Forest Gump? It sounds like if you were that feather, you'd say, "OK, I'm flying west because I decided to fly west, because the way I'm angled means I'll fly west." Whereas if I were that feather, I'd say, "Hmm, I guess I'm flying west because the wind is blowing me that way. And hey look, I'm angled that way too. What a coincidence!"

    I don't have the self knowledge that you do and my vision of the person I want to become is fuzzy. So Instead, with my Ne, I'm attuned to the odd coincidences and synchronicities that can tell me I'm on the right track.

    (Erg... my first reply to this was so much better but my internet connection lost it. So I hope that made sense.)

    Interesting. I get what you're saying. We kinda 'get lived' whereas others seem to have a direct idea of where they're going. And I'm like you on every aspect of my life...except when it comes to the person I want to be. I'll do a mix. I have spent the last couple of years doing a lot of self-reflection, withdrawn in myself, trying to figure myself out. Everytime I figured a part out, or I hit a temporary dead-end, I'll go out in the world again for new inspiration. In essence, I know where I want to go, and what the end result should look like. But how I get there is very much unchartered. Also, if other opportunities will present themselves along the way, I will reevaluate my goal to see if I should factor them in, if they are relevant to what I want to achieve or if they are maybe worth pursuing on their own or are possibly able to enhance the end goal in some way.

    As Cascadeco said:


    Quote Originally Posted by cascadeco View Post
    Well, I think it will vary amongst INFJ's - well, amongst all Ni doms - based on personal motivation, values, priorities, etc. As we all probably have our own unique definitions/views of self-growth, and what that means for us.

    For myself, I've always been very big on Balance. I'll bring mbti terms/cognitive functions into this, just because it's easier to illustrate.

    I see value in all 8 cognitive functions, and I do not view it as 'healthy' for me to lie too heavily, or be too overly focused, on any one. Now obviously I have my preferences, and I'll always use some more than others, but I don't hold any one function above any other, and I don't hold one as the epitome and cast others off into the shadows. Now I'm going to wax philosophical here, but I think each can provide a certain facet, a certain window, into existence, and into life.

    So, I embrace sensory experiences, because I think they can make me a richer, more balanced individual. If I feel I'm going too far in that direction, or more likely, if I notice other aspects of myself falling by the wayside, I'll pull back, and I may reflect for a while. I might buy a book of logic puzzles because I decide my brain is becoming jello and I need to keep myself, and my analytical capabilities, as sharp as possible. I might decide I've been sitting still too long, and have become complacent with my life, so I need to shake things up and do new things. It's more intuitive, I suppose...but for myself, it's always that key word of 'Balance' that's in the forefront -- never going too far in any one direction, trying to balance my life out, and all aspects of the human condition, and not fall too far on one side so that I'm missing out or disregarding another.
    balance is everything, imo
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  3. #23
    Senior Member whimsical's Avatar
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    i like to use my intuition and test possibilities out with my own mind as well as relating to other people, actually the 2 help each other in combination
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  4. #24
    movin melodies kiddykat's Avatar
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    I think self-actualization for me is to be well-rounded- to actually be able to accomplish what I want without being tied down.. It's when I feel that my core needs are met, and I can do more..

    I crave learning anything/everything new. Most things. There are certain things I rather not touch, but overall, I love exploring new things/improving on what can be improved..

    So I guess self-actualization for me means growth. In that process there has to be a sense of enjoyment, fulfillment, purpose, joy, most of all, laughter. Life's gottabe fun to make it worth living.

  5. #25
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    Quote Originally Posted by Amargith View Post
    Interesting. I get what you're saying. We kinda 'get lived' whereas others seem to have a direct idea of where they're going. And I'm like you on every aspect of my life...except when it comes to the person I want to be. I'll do a mix. I have spent the last couple of years doing a lot of self-reflection, withdrawn in myself, trying to figure myself out. Everytime I figured a part out, or I hit a temporary dead-end, I'll go out in the world again for new inspiration. In essence, I know where I want to go, and what the end result should look like. But how I get there is very much unchartered. Also, if other opportunities will present themselves along the way, I will reevaluate my goal to see if I should factor them in, if they are relevant to what I want to achieve or if they are maybe worth pursuing on their own or are possibly able to enhance the end goal in some way.
    I'm not entirely convinced that developing all eight functions like cascadeco wrote is a productive method of self-actualization. We mostly rely on our dominant functions in daily life. While developing our shadow functions could be educational in some ways, it's not convenient or really feasible to step out of our main functions on a regular basis.

    You were spot on when you said that our type tends to "get lived." I also think this might be why ENFPs are often written as having a "cosmic" worldview. It's the extroverted intuition coupled with Fi, which seeks to define values, which makes us in many ways dependent on the emotional states of the people around us and how that affects us. We get more "lived" than ENTPs even because Ti seeks universal truths and thus are able to view situations objectively.

    I think the engine of our self-growth might ultimately come down to our Te.

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