User Tag List

Page 23 of 92 FirstFirst ... 1321222324253373 ... LastLast
Results 221 to 230 of 914

Thread: What types are your family and friends?

  1. #221
    Blah Array Orangey's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    MBTI
    ESTP
    Enneagram
    6w5
    Socionics
    SLE
    Posts
    6,371

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Eric B View Post
    Fi was something both parents would push on me as I entered adolescence, but it went over my head. My "Feeling" was more concerned more with the external harmony with others, and they believed harmony should start within, and you should have more of a logical harmony on the outside to get along with people (neatness in appearance, order,etc.) I could never understand this, and it was often aggrivating, and came acrossbto me as pacifying. If others don't respect you, just "respect yourself" and it will all work out.
    Thus this came up in their use of Fe, which was Trickster. They were not really concerned with shared values (generally calling society an "insane asylum"), but when I was having problems with people, they appealed to external values, and even overestimated them, as Berens even says. Like suggesting I had trouble getting girls because I would sometimes have wrinkes in my clothes, or because they saw me with my shirt coming untucked sometimes. Yet one girl I liked would hang around with a bummy guy who was dirty from head to toe. I tried to tell them that couldn't be it, but then they appealed to their age and knowledge. So again, it was confusing for them to call society an insane asylum, but then criticize me for not going along with it. But that was their way of trying to motivate me to grow and survive in the world. When they did articulate Ti "principles", they were quite literally, "critical parents".
    My parents were exactly like this (ISTJ mom, ISFJ dad). When I was in middle school, they would go on and on about how they felt the system was stupid, and how teachers were morons, and so on. Then, when I showed up with a detention for something silly like chewing gum, they became all rigid about how I shouldn't be blaming anyone else but myself because I had pissed the teacher off (there was no official anti-chewing gum rule).

    They do this to my brothers (ENTP & INTP) as well. They would go on and on about how they should be their own people, how they should be individuals and stand up for themselves in the face of everyone else's values (and this would literally come in the form of a lecture). But now that my brothers are teenagers, and one has decided to grow his hair out longer for style while the other has let his grow unruly for lack of caring, my parents harp on them all the time to get it cut. They've even threatened to cut it themselves. In all fairness, though, this pressure comes more from my ISFJ dad than my ISTJ mom...which I think may reflect more of a homophobic tendency than a type related difference.
    Artes, Scientia, Veritasiness

  2. #222
    Queen hunter Array Virtual ghost's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    MBTI
    INTJ
    Enneagram
    513 so/sp
    Posts
    7,528

    Default

    I have a reson to think


    Mom xNFP
    Dad: ISFP
    Grandmother: ESFJ
    Aunt:ESFJ
    Uncle: ESFP


    Guess who is the black sheep in the family.



    But we don't hate each other

  3. #223
    Occasional Member Array Evan's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    MBTI
    INFJ
    Enneagram
    1
    Posts
    4,223

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Antisocial one View Post
    I have a reson to think


    Mom xNFP
    Dad: ISFP
    Grandmother: ESFJ
    Aunt:ESFJ
    Uncle: ESFP


    Guess who is the black sheep in the family.



    But we don't hate each other
    All Fs! That makes so much sense!

  4. #224
    The Destroyer Array Colors's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    MBTI
    ISTP
    Enneagram
    5x/o
    Posts
    1,271

    Default

    Good questions, Eck, I wish it wasn't merged. (And good responses!)

    Quote Originally Posted by EcK View Post
    I'm curious about the dynamics between types within a family.
    My parents are divorced. I have one younger brother.

    Mom: E?F?
    My mother is the hardest to type for me. She tends to be incredibly irrational in arguments to the point where you can only "win" with her if you resort to emotional manipulation. She very much distrusts people in theory and will draw paranoid conclusions based on little to no evidence. But in practice, she connects with people very easily and helps them quite readily. I think that for a long time she tried to fit into an ISFJ mold, which confuses my reading. At present I think she's ENFJ, with a side guess on ESFP.
    Dynamic: My brother and I generally try to avoid her when she's being completely wrong and drastic because it's completely useless to discuss anything. At most other times she's rather concillatory and forgets all about her heated declarations of sweeping change- and rather easygoing. A rather poor listener and hoists her own interpretations into everything. Rather turbulent, so we kids don't understand her much (and vice versa).

    Dad: eSTJ- The charmer: He puts on a public face of geniality and joke-making (while spewing time-tested "meaningful" cliches a mile a minute). Very manipulative. In private, he's very controlling and rule-making and always expecting things to fit into *his* mold of the idealized world. His very traditional world and unflexible, sexist ways contributed greatly to the divorce.
    Dynamics: What we have in common is are generally logical approaches, however most of our interactions involving any sort of decision-making ends up rather explosive and incredibly antagonisitic. He always set up rules and I always ignored them because our core values were often in conflict. He's very into social status/manipulation where I was into genuine-ness (word?).

    He's also very traditional, aka sexist, which was a huge contributor to the divorce. I always resented his ideas of what a female offspring should be like and his great relationship with his ESFJ nephew (the true eldest son he never had). Least flexible person in the family, especially with minor household chores/upkeep.

    Brother: iSFP, teenage; the peacemaker: A very sensitive soul though he's gotten better at hiding it now that he's pretty much all grown up. Very active and needs constant contact with his friends.
    Dynamics: He often avoids conflict as it comes up in a family unit or concedes his side or takes blame on himself- the end result (and harmony) matters more than standing up for oneself or being "right". I suppose he took on this role at some point out of necessity due to three other stubborn personalities. The best listener.

    He has a much better relationship with our dad. Mostly because he's incredibly gullible to my dad's "tweakings" of the truth. And he's able to subvert my father and catch him off guard using his natural silliness and fun. It's a balance that works for them, though I'm constantly having to reinform my brother with the cynical cold-hard facts.

    Me: female ISTP (early 20s) - I often fall into the arbitrater/ tie-breaking role. I suppose I'm perceived as the fair one, but also the stubborn and antisocial one.
    Dynamics: In family life, I can be very much the eldest sibling, bossy and always thinking that people need me to rely upon (even when they are probably very capable on their own)... all which is very different to who I am in the world. My brother sees me as the incredibly cranky but smart older-sister. My mother sees the idealistic and lazy and independent daughter. My father sees the rebellious and impractical girl.

  5. #225
    Queen hunter Array Virtual ghost's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    MBTI
    INTJ
    Enneagram
    513 so/sp
    Posts
    7,528

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Evan View Post
    All Fs! That makes so much sense!

    Yes it does. The reason why I didn't say more is because I was curious about others noticing it.



    I could never trully relate to them.
    It is not only F, I technically share only one letter with each of them.
    (if we presume mom is E).


    That is why I have started to develope self suficiency from early childhood which resulted with what it resulted.

    Because of physical appearance I know I am not adopted.

  6. #226
    The Destroyer Array Colors's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    MBTI
    ISTP
    Enneagram
    5x/o
    Posts
    1,271

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Antisocial_one
    That is why I have started to develope self suficiency from early childhood which resulted with what it resulted.
    Did you feel like you had to develop self sufficency because your family members were so lacking? Or even not lacking so much as inefficient?

    Or were they just ... different?

  7. #227
    Queen hunter Array Virtual ghost's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    MBTI
    INTJ
    Enneagram
    513 so/sp
    Posts
    7,528

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Colors View Post
    Did you feel like you had to develop self sufficency because your family members were so lacking? Or even not lacking so much as inefficient?

    Or were they just ... different?
    I was never average Joe and I was rated a gifted since when I was a baby. While others in kindergarden were drawing houses an flowers I was already interested in things like Jupiters atmosphere and world atlas.

    For my entire life there is a huge gap between me and everybody else.
    My family was/is quite kind to me but there was never a real click.
    Yes, they are quite inefficient by my standards.

  8. #228
    Member Array Sture's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    MBTI
    INTP
    Enneagram
    Hah
    Posts
    60

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by TheChosenOne View Post

    My dad is ENTP.
    My mom is INFJ.
    My sis is INFJ.
    My dad is an I, otherwise we're in the same situation.
    (I also have a ENFJ sister and a ESFP brother)

    How do you cope with the INFJ dominance?

    I discovered the MBTI system at the same time as I was really getting to know my sister and developing a great friendship with her. I got totally into the INFJ type and basically proclaimed it my favourite other type (I like ISTJ too). But now, 1-2 years later, as I'm getting over my crush on the INFJ type, the downsides of the INFJs have almost entirely overshadowed the positives. These days I often find it challenging/frustrating spending time with my INFJ sis and mom. Especially when they're together of course.

    What is your experience?

    At first I thought maybe ISTJs are more comfortable with INFJs, but then I remembered seeing my sister and her ISTJ boyfriend together.
    Comparing my sisters relationship with me and that with her boyfriend I think it's as simple as that the friction arises where the letters differ. I have a problem with her FJ and he with her NF.

    Any thoughts?

  9. #229
    EvanTheClown (ETC) Array Clownmaster's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    MBTI
    ENFP
    Enneagram
    2
    Socionics
    IEE
    Posts
    965

    Default

    Me: ENFP
    Brother: ISTJ (talk about a weird childhood for the 2 of us)

    Grandma: ESFP
    Grandpa: ISTJ
    Mom: ISFP? probably wrong on this one.
    Dad: Drunk. Haven't been around him sober long enough to type him.

    Because you can't spell "Slaughter" without "Laughter"

  10. #230
    Senior Member Array NewEra's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    MBTI
    I
    Posts
    3,104

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Sture View Post
    My dad is an I, otherwise we're in the same situation.
    (I also have a ENFJ sister and a ESFP brother)

    How do you cope with the INFJ dominance?

    I discovered the MBTI system at the same time as I was really getting to know my sister and developing a great friendship with her. I got totally into the INFJ type and basically proclaimed it my favourite other type (I like ISTJ too). But now, 1-2 years later, as I'm getting over my crush on the INFJ type, the downsides of the INFJs have almost entirely overshadowed the positives. These days I often find it challenging/frustrating spending time with my INFJ sis and mom. Especially when they're together of course.

    What is your experience?

    At first I thought maybe ISTJs are more comfortable with INFJs, but then I remembered seeing my sister and her ISTJ boyfriend together.
    Comparing my sisters relationship with me and that with her boyfriend I think it's as simple as that the friction arises where the letters differ. I have a problem with her FJ and he with her NF.

    Any thoughts?
    Actually, despite my mom and sis both being INFJ, they do not getting along the best. I believe it's because they both take things too sensitively. Being with INFJ's is not too bad really, you just have to be careful what you say. My sister tends to hold grudges too, she once didn't speak to me for a month over some small thing I said to her.

    So above all, it's the F factor which makes me not get along with them, if anything. One time they got in a fight over the phone, and it's because one was accusing the other of saying something harsh. I thought they were both wrong in overreacting.

Similar Threads

  1. Replies: 33
    Last Post: 05-04-2016, 05:39 AM
  2. [E6] Enneagram 6: What are your variants and what scares you?
    By The Great One in forum Enneatypes
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 04-30-2013, 06:30 PM
  3. [ISFJ] isfj: what are your hobbies and interest?
    By gasoline in forum The SJ Guardhouse (ESFJ, ISFJ, ESTJ, ISTJ)
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 04-23-2012, 07:10 PM
  4. [NT] NT only: Which type are your closest friends of the same sex?
    By fragrance in forum The NT Rationale (ENTP, INTP, ENTJ, INTJ)
    Replies: 30
    Last Post: 05-02-2011, 10:22 AM
  5. [ISTJ] ISTJ's - What type are your parents?
    By swordpath in forum The SJ Guardhouse (ESFJ, ISFJ, ESTJ, ISTJ)
    Replies: 27
    Last Post: 06-26-2010, 07:14 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
Single Sign On provided by vBSSO