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  1. #71
    Senior Member Mephistopheles's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by YourLocalJesus View Post
    I was ridiculously unpopular starting the second year in junior high until my last day in junior high (age 14 to 16). Even hated.
    Wasn't treated very well. Up until then I had been the most popular kid in my school and i'm not lying when I say that girls from my entire town was drooling and literally stalking me.
    By the age of 14 I had had way too many sexual invites, even from older girls. I'm honest now, I did not understand all the fairly obvious hinting and smiling. Perhaps I offended them?
    I don't really know what happened, it was probably some power struggle or something, where I was seen as a threat by some other popular but more mean person.
    I was way innocent back then, so I didn't even realize it was a contest. Now that i'm older that seems like the only explanation, I was never mean to anyone. I've always been too kind, if anything.
    High school was in town, and I had come there from a little suburban school with a total of 61 kids. My new school had a much harsher social climate and was much bigger.

    To be honest, I was mostly annoyed by being liked for my looks. It's all so superficial and I was in love with the same girl for three years, all my admirers didn't make stuff better.
    It sounds so freaking odd to say that. I'd totally want that attention now that I don't have it.
    But anyway, I just moved away from my home town. That place will be forever tainted to me.
    People there will always view me in that light, even if I broke out of it and became at least somewhat popular among my friends and acquaintances again from age 17 and onwards.
    I had to gain that through beating people up. I didn't want to, but I had to. They were really mean towards me and others. After that I became more feared than loved, but it was a little bit more peaceful.

    Getting ostracized by literally everyone (even my best friend cut me loose), immensely backtalked/trashtalked, publicly humiliated, and otherwise mentally abused by almost everyone in my vicinity for years (including some teachers) was really not my idea of fun.
    They tried to get physical with me, but i've always been strong and fast. Funny that the good-looking kid who's better than everyone in sports get treated like that. It's not very stereotypical, right?
    It didn't come without benefits, though. I became a total nerd, in terms of interests, and I learned even more to value personality instead of exterior.
    This post is hugely emo, but healing that particular shit will take a long time.
    It effectively colored ten years of my life, until two months ago when I left it for good. I feel like I will flourish here, far away from where that shit ruled my world.
    I'm already losing weight and gaining good habits that I used to be too depressed to deal with. Like many depressed people, I got lazy and fat.
    Even if I had a lot of muscles because of work and lifting weights later on, i've been too chubby to look my best since I was 16. No girls swooning for me now.
    I'm not who I could have been, but what the heck. If life hadn't challenged me, I probably would have been worse in the end.
    Yeah, I do reckon that can be a good thing, since i'm not really much for superficial attention. I just want one person who loves me for who I am, not how I look.
    It took moving here to realize that I was still depressed, just in another layer of it all. You can't say I was ever really defeated, but I sure as hell was worn out and lulled into accepting shit as normal.
    I still lived in that paradigm, where I had had to fight bloody hard for everything. Can't say I really "conquered" anything... Not like in the movies.
    But i'm kind of proud of that I even finished school with OK grades, that I got a couple of fairly good jobs and that I didn't kill anyone because of this. But like I said, i'm too kind.

    It's only in the last few months, now that I see the light at the end of the tunnel, that I have started to become "myself" again.
    The older and hopefully wiser version of who I used to be when I was a kid.
    He's been gone far too long, and it's nice that things are starting to return to the way they are supposed to be.
    This is a huge reason that I changed my type to ENFJ, since that is what I was, and that is what I am turning back to being now that my environment isn't hostile anymore.

    Fi-loaded post there, but it was therapeutic ^^


    I was definitely not the "Trend Setter" for more than a year during High School, anyway.
    But during my popular year, people actually did try to imitate my hairstyle and took to wearing my kind of clothes. Guess they were pretty unusual.
    I can feel with you. Just for you to know, it doesn't sound emo imho; I think if someone is treated like that, it's his simple right to at least rant about it in the internet. I would have beat them up frequently for fun, actually.
    Weirdly, I'm kinda the opposite though; Although I'm a introverted nerd, I never had problems people to get to like me at school, though I were never some kind of trendsetter. Guess popularity at schools really is mostly about luck....
    Anyway, I honestly hope for you that you'll be treated better in future. I hate nothing more than decent people getting mistreated, it almost makes me rage everytime I see or hear that.

    Does my try at Fe sound good?^^
    They say I only think in form of crunching numbers.....
    -Fall Out Boy

  2. #72
    Certified Sausage Smoker Elfboy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mephistopheles View Post
    I can feel with you. Just for you to know, it doesn't sound emo imho; I think if someone is treated like that, it's his simple right to at least rant about it in the internet. I would have beat them up frequently for fun, actually.
    Weirdly, I'm kinda the opposite though; Although I'm a introverted nerd, I never had problems people to get to like me at school, though I were never some kind of trendsetter. Guess popularity at schools really is mostly about luck....
    Anyway, I honestly hope for you that you'll be treated better in future. I hate nothing more than decent people getting mistreated, it almost makes me rage everytime I see or hear that.
    Does my try at Fe sound good?^^
    actually, this sounds more like Fi, particularly the part in bold
    ENFP: We put the Fi in Fire
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  3. #73
    Senior Member Noon's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Elfboy View Post
    actually, this sounds more like Fi, particularly the part in bold
    How exactly does this, especially the bolded, sound less like Fe?

  4. #74
    Certified Sausage Smoker Elfboy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Noon View Post
    How exactly does this, especially the bolded, sound less like Fe?
    It sounds like Fe, but it also sounds more like Fi. the bold part in particular refers to a visceral response to a violated ethical conviction. this response shows strong levels of Fi
    ENFP: We put the Fi in Fire
    ENFP
    5w4>1w9>2w1 Sx/Sp
    SEE-Fi
    Papa Bear
    Motivation: Dark Worker
    Alignment: Chaotic Neutral
    Chibi Seme
    MTG Color: black/red
    Male Archtype: King/Lover
    Sunburst!
    "You are a gay version of Gambit" Speed Gavroche
    "I wish that I could be affected by any hate, but I can't, cuz I just get affected by the bank" Chamillionaire

  5. #75
    Senior Member Noon's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Elfboy View Post
    It sounds like Fe, but it also sounds more like Fi. the bold part in particular refers to a visceral response to a violated ethical conviction. this response shows strong levels of Fi
    Ah, I get (understand) you now.

    But do you think that Ti/Fe types, especially primary Ti types, can or can't be morally outraged over social cliquishness or injustice? It seems like it'd be something common with inferior Fe especially.

    (Though before anyone jumps on me, this isn't to say it's strictly a type thing)

  6. #76
    Certified Sausage Smoker Elfboy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Noon View Post
    Ah, I get (understand) you now.

    But do you think that Ti/Fe types, especially primary Ti types, can or can't be morally outraged over social cliquishness or injustice? It seems like it'd be something common with inferior Fe especially.

    (Though before anyone jumps on me, this isn't to say it's strictly a type thing)
    I'm not going to jump on you lol
    but I do believe TPs and FJs can still have strong Fi, it's just more unusual.
    ENFP: We put the Fi in Fire
    ENFP
    5w4>1w9>2w1 Sx/Sp
    SEE-Fi
    Papa Bear
    Motivation: Dark Worker
    Alignment: Chaotic Neutral
    Chibi Seme
    MTG Color: black/red
    Male Archtype: King/Lover
    Sunburst!
    "You are a gay version of Gambit" Speed Gavroche
    "I wish that I could be affected by any hate, but I can't, cuz I just get affected by the bank" Chamillionaire

  7. #77
    Analytical Dreamer Coriolis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Noon View Post
    Ah, I get (understand) you now.

    But do you think that Ti/Fe types, especially primary Ti types, can or can't be morally outraged over social cliquishness or injustice? It seems like it'd be something common with inferior Fe especially.
    I agree with Elfboy's diagnosis. I'm not sure I have seen the same kind of moral outrage in Ti-doms. My INTP, for instance, is big on fairness and treating people kindly, but he seems to value it because it makes everything work out better. In other words, his focus is on effective interactions so everyone can get more done. I, on the other hand, experience more of the visceral response that Elfboy describes. So, we seek the same outcome, but from somewhat different motivations/perspectives.
    I've been called a criminal, a terrorist, and a threat to the known universe. But everything you were told is a lie. The truth is, they've taken our freedom, our home, and our future. The time has come for all humanity to take a stand...

  8. #78
    Senior Member Mephistopheles's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Coriolis View Post
    I agree with Elfboy's diagnosis. I'm not sure I have seen the same kind of moral outrage in Ti-doms. My INTP, for instance, is big on fairness and treating people kindly, but he seems to value it because it makes everything work out better. In other words, his focus is on effective interactions so everyone can get more done. I, on the other hand, experience more of the visceral response that Elfboy describes. So, we seek the same outcome, but from somewhat different motivations/perspectives.
    Isn't it quite usual for INTPs to have a knight-in-shining-armor-complex? Though it's maybe a bit unusual to have that also outside of a relationship.
    They say I only think in form of crunching numbers.....
    -Fall Out Boy

  9. #79
    Analytical Dreamer Coriolis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mephistopheles View Post
    Isn't it quite usual for INTPs to have a knight-in-shining-armor-complex? Though it's maybe a bit unusual to have that also outside of a relationship.
    It is, and that's not what they do, at least IME. What I see is quietly consistent fair/honest/courteous behavior, guided by principles the INTP may not even be able to articulate. I also see a surprising digging-in of their heels when a few key principles are violated. There is an emphasis on the INTP's own behavior, rather than any attempt to get others to do "the right thing". No preaching, crusading, not much emotion, even; but the INTP can be good at setting an example. My own Fi, by contrast, charges my morality with much more emotion, and a more activist bent, which I take care to curb where inappropriate.

    Perhaps fairness and basic courtesy is part of an INTP's Ti concept of the world, so violations of that stand out as wrong, and require correction. It is almost that they know it is wrong rather than that they feel it is wrong. The Fe influence, to the degree present, probably reflects some appreciation of the effect of actions on others, one's own actions, or those of other people. There may be some Si influence as well. At least I see it in my INTP, who often uses his own upbringing, values taught, etc. as a starting point. Injustice and cruelty are just "not the way things are supposed to be done". I am no expert on functions, and I suspect the interplay among functions here is significant.
    I've been called a criminal, a terrorist, and a threat to the known universe. But everything you were told is a lie. The truth is, they've taken our freedom, our home, and our future. The time has come for all humanity to take a stand...

  10. #80
    Senior Member Noon's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Coriolis View Post
    I agree with Elfboy's diagnosis. I'm not sure I have seen the same kind of moral outrage in Ti-doms. My INTP, for instance, is big on fairness and treating people kindly, but he seems to value it because it makes everything work out better. In other words, his focus is on effective interactions so everyone can get more done. I, on the other hand, experience more of the visceral response that Elfboy describes. So, we seek the same outcome, but from somewhat different motivations/perspectives.
    It seems to vary from person to person.

    I've witnessed NTPs very loudly express their strong responses to what violates their principles of integrity and intellectual honesty as well as what they consider bad social norms and values. I think how visceral the response is, is most related to how strongly it sets off one of your own unique (non-functional) emotional triggers.

    I just expect that someone with an Fi preference might be more inclined to comfortably admit the strength or depth of an emotional reaction and its role in their argument.

    Quote Originally Posted by Coriolis View Post
    It is, and that's not what they do, at least IME. What I see is quietly consistent fair/honest/courteous behavior, guided by principles the INTP may not even be able to articulate. I also see a surprising digging-in of their heels when a few key principles are violated. There is an emphasis on the INTP's own behavior, rather than any attempt to get others to do "the right thing". No preaching, crusading, not much emotion, even; but the INTP can be good at setting an example. My own Fi, by contrast, charges my morality with much more emotion, and a more activist bent, which I take care to curb where inappropriate.
    Here is where I guess temperament is at play. Most IPs tend to be quiet individualists who value their own autonomy so strongly that they are careful to respect or not infringe upon the autonomy of others (via preaching, for example). Even IFPs are commonly said to be quite tolerant, likely to lead primarily by example and are unlikely to fiercely rally against something unless it is a matter of transcendent right and wrong that demands action. I would say that ITPs can similarly rise to action to defend something as important (perhaps dealing with universal principles of truth and intellectual freedom) with strong conviction.

    There is also that most IPs are BtS. An ENFJ might be far more preachy and pro-active about their values -- even without emotion -- despite not having an Fi preference.

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