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  1. #31
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    Quote Originally Posted by Thursday View Post
    What are your scores and matches?
    Ha. The funny thing is that I don't really care about my own theory here. I'm not into people like that, but I would say INFP, since my T and J are my weaker functions. They're all pretty strong though so its hard to differentiate. I don't know how compatible the INFP is with myself so I can't really analyze this on a personal level. I guess I could....

  2. #32
    Babylon Candle Venom's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by lemons View Post
    Ha. The funny thing is that I don't really care about my own theory here. I'm not into people like that, but I would say INFP, since my T and J are my weaker functions. They're all pretty strong though so its hard to differentiate. I don't know how compatible the INFP is with myself so I can't really analyze this on a personal level. I guess I could....
    so if my most strong preference are E and N... does that mean you'd put me with ENFP? not sure i agree...i mean i like ENFPs...but like, wouldnt we just end up talking over each/tiring each other out? (then again, my closest friend is an ENFP... i think in real life, ENFPs arent necessarily as talkative as everyone on here would guess).

    maybe it should be: I with E or I; E with I... THEN weakest preference.

  3. #33
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    Aside from a few putzes on here who give me a low star rating for little reason
    this idea has been popping up everywhere I go. Married couples I talked to fit exact with this and so do single's ideal, those singles whom I am acquainted with. Seems that this idea is better than having a large scale personal problem with me

  4. #34
    Wannabe genius Splittet's Avatar
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    "Opposites attract" is a scam, and only true when it comes to gender. For everything else, similarities attract, and predicts better relationship. Some personality characteristics (Big Five) are generally favorable in romantic relationships though - most importantly emotional stability, but also conscientiousness (especially impulsiveness in the man is stressing on a relationship) and agreeableness. As far as introversion/extroversion and openness goes, one should find someone similar to oneself. Similarity in age, values, interests and everything else you can think of also predicts a better relationship, and so does self-disclosure.
    "Neither a lofty degree of intelligence nor imagination nor both together go to the making of genius. Love, love, love, that is the soul of genius." - Wolfgang Amadť Mozart

  5. #35
    IRL is not real Cimarron's Avatar
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    People have been talking about this lately, so I figured I'd bump it, to clear up any questions about what "Lemons' theory" for relationship pairings is.



    In a way, you might say that Keirsey had the same idea, except he thought the only scale worth applying this to was the N/S scale. And that he thought the gap was so wide that we'd probably always prefer same-preference on that scale.

    This just generalizes it out, saying that it applies to all 4 scales. Not just N/S, but now any of the 4 scales for a relationship pair could be "unbridge-able", insurmountable if one's preference in a scale is very strong.

    I was also thinking that this could be described as an Acid-Base relationship approach. When Acids lose an H+ atom, they become the Base form of themselves, their "Conjugate". Strong acids have weak conjugate bases, and very strong acids have very weak conjugate bases, etc.

    Just as easily, we might say that strong Fs need weak conjugate Ts as their match, very strong Ps need very weak Js as their match... though technically, Lemons' theory would have them cross the neutral line when a preference gets too strong (and that wouldn't happen with chemistry, I think), but it's a general idea.


    Lemons' idea:

    _
    |
    |
    |
    |
    |--weak I
    |
    |----neutral line
    |
    |--weak E
    |
    |
    |
    _



    _
    |
    |--strong I
    |
    |
    |
    |--slight I
    |-----neutral line
    |
    |
    |
    |
    |
    _

    The distance between the two people's preferences is about the same no matter where the placement. Too wide a gap on the scale would just grate on each other's nerves.
    You can't spell "justice" without ISTJ.

  6. #36
    Babylon Candle Venom's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cimarron View Post
    People have been talking about this lately, so I figured I'd bump it, to clear up any questions about what "Lemons' theory" for relationship pairings is.



    In a way, you might say that Keirsey had the same idea, except he thought the only scale worth applying this to was the N/S scale. And that he thought the gap was so wide that we'd probably always prefer same-preference on that scale.

    This just generalizes it out, saying that it applies to all 4 scales. Not just N/S, but now any of the 4 scales for a relationship pair could be "unbridge-able", insurmountable if one's preference in a scale is very strong.

    I was also thinking that this could be described as an Acid-Base relationship approach. When Acids lose an H+ atom, they become the Base form of themselves, their "Conjugate". Strong acids have weak conjugate bases, and very strong acids have very weak conjugate bases, etc.

    Just as easily, we might say that strong Fs need weak conjugate Ts as their match, very strong Ps need very weak Js as their match... though technically, Lemons' theory would have them cross the neutral line when a preference gets too strong (and that wouldn't happen with chemistry, I think), but it's a general idea.


    Lemons' idea:

    _
    |
    |
    |
    |
    |--weak I
    |
    |----neutral line
    |
    |--weak E
    |
    |
    |
    _



    _
    |
    |--strong I
    |
    |
    |
    |--slight I
    |-----neutral line
    |
    |
    |
    |
    |
    _

    The distance between the two people's preferences is about the same no matter where the placement. Too wide a gap on the scale would just grate on each other's nerves.

    what makes this theory better is the flexibility. it allows for say one ENTJ to want ____ and another to want _____. it can be one letter lfipped, or 3 flipped, depending on how weak or strong you are.

    eNtj with INFP, ENtj with ENFP or ENTj with ENTP etc could all fit into this theory as being the "best" match.

  7. #37
    4x9 cascadeco's Avatar
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    It makes sense, if you're wanting a relationship with the least potential amount of conflict and misunderstanding.

    So a strong I would be best with another I with this theory.

    According to this, I think my best match would be INTP. Now I like INTP's quite a lot, and can see that allure.

    However I already know that I don't particularly want to be in a ltr with another introvert, as introverts don't really know how to 'bring me out', and vice versa. We both end up being introverted together. Fine on a companionship/friendship level, but for a lifelong relationship, I actually desire for one of my strongest traits - being introverted and introspective and more withdrawn - to be balanced out by someone who pulls me out of my shell.

    But I understand the concept, and there are a good number of people who do desire their relationships to be more along those lines.
    "...On and on and on and on he strode, far out over the sands, singing wildly to the sea, crying to greet the advent of the life that had cried to him." - James Joyce

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  8. #38
    IRL is not real Cimarron's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Babylon Candle View Post
    what makes this theory better is the flexibility. it allows for say one ENTJ to want ____ and another to want _____. it can be one letter lfipped, or 3 flipped...
    Good point. Most "best match" theories choose one type to go with one other, for instance ISFJ always going with ESTP. Some, like Socionics, branch it out to a few more choices, but it's still completely defined by type (as far as I can tell), for instance type ABCD always with WXCD or WXCZ, in about equal probability.

    This theory defines "best match" from individual to individual. As you said, ENfP could have a different match than EnFP, or eNFP, or ENFp, or enFP,.... You get all 16 types (even your own) being possibly "best" no matter what your type, depending on your personal strengths. To me, this also seems to imply and allow for greater diversity within all types...acknowledging, you might say, that preferences vary quite a bit among members of a type.
    Last edited by Cimarron; 02-26-2009 at 10:48 AM. Reason: combinations I didn't realize
    You can't spell "justice" without ISTJ.

  9. #39
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    Quote Originally Posted by cascademn View Post
    It makes sense, if you're wanting a relationship with the least potential amount of conflict and misunderstanding.

    So a strong I would be best with another I with this theory.

    According to this, I think my best match would be INTP. Now I like INTP's quite a lot, and can see that allure.

    However I already know that I don't particularly want to be in a ltr with another introvert, as introverts don't really know how to 'bring me out', and vice versa. We both end up being introverted together. Fine on a companionship/friendship level, but for a lifelong relationship, I actually desire for one of my strongest traits - being introverted and introspective and more withdrawn - to be balanced out by someone who pulls me out of my shell.

    But I understand the concept, and there are a good number of people who do desire their relationships to be more along those lines.
    how old are you? not that im some wise old man haha...but i predict that if you ARE actaully a strong I, it wont work to be with this said E who will draw you out... (the same reason i just cant ever see myself with an ISXX)

  10. #40
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    So clearly I should find another INTP.
    "All humour has a foundation of truth."
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