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Intuitives and human potential?

Snow Turtle

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One thing that I constantly see in websites regarding intuitives is that supposedly they look at the potential in other people. How does that apply to yourself?

Especially when it connects to the idea of constantly striving to reach your potential will lead to unhappiness. How do you deal?
 

527468

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Well you mentioned happiness. I personally care a lot less about happiness than I do about meaning or potential. I can always risk myself for the greater good, being something that I see in a person or a tangible goal of mine, but I do that in a strategic way so the best of my ability is used and there requires little fallback.

I am not an F, so I can't say that I am too caring on a personal level because honestly I couldn't handle the pressure. I am a lot better with master plans and creations that take sampler understanding to a new level.

I see happiness as an ideal. It doesn't really exist as it should, thus its order is always in need of improvement. As I see it, happiness is not ready to be used because there is a lot of work to be done to improve and I can't do all of it. I will feel happier when I put in my merit.
 

SilkRoad

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This is an old thread, but I was thinking of posting something very similar, so I did a search and when I found this I thought I would just resurrect it!

I feel like I constantly see the potential in others and that it actually tends to cause me enormous problems. It can mean that I don't see others in a realistic way. This is particularly a pitfall in the realm of relationships, but it can be a wider problem than that.

It's like, if I love someone or care deeply about them as a friend or family member or whatever, I have an unrealistic view that if I believe in them enough, they can shake off the things that are holding them back and they can be the amazing person I see inside them. I know that probably sounds terribly cheesy, but it's along those lines. Not that I think they would be perfect. I'm not QUITE that stupidly idealistic. But they would be much happier, or nicer to be around, or healthier, and closer to fulfilling their full potential.

It causes me a degree of unhappiness (sometimes a great deal of it) to see people I care about suffering, or somehow much "lower" than they should be. I want to alleviate that. I guess it's partly altruistic and partly selfish. I think I have learned a little about keeping a distance from people who really are in a bad way AND don't want to do anything about it. I've realised that sometimes you need to be a bit selfish to protect yourself.

I am pretty sure that many people like me because I am able to show that I believe in them, in a sort of understated encouraging way, and without being too pushy (although if I lecture them, it proves I REALLY care!). I think it provides them with a kind of relief. I've found this especially with those who normally have a lot of demands placed on them - because I'm not too demanding. If I like them, I'm just there and supportive. The problem is, I think sometimes such people use me as a crutch, and they think I'll always be there. Whereas what sometimes happens is I get tired of being around their pain and unfulfilled potential. Then it's almost like I go too far in the other direction. I feel like I have to write them off.

I'm not sure I'm saying what I need to say here but I wonder if anyone relates. Do you feel it's a problem to have too much of an eye to potential? How do you achieve realism and balance over this?
 

Winds of Thor

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One thing that I constantly see in websites regarding intuitives is that supposedly they look at the potential in other people. How does that apply to yourself?

Especially when it connects to the idea of constantly striving to reach your potential will lead to unhappiness. How do you deal?

I see potential of people through thoughts that come to mind. Rarely would I actively try and judge...I could if I foresaw someone's safety were about to be compromised or in an emergency situation, and only then to direct things. Other than that, looking for factors of potential I feel has inherent bias and I'm not suited to do that. So I generally don't. That bothers me nonetheless. So I 'roll with it'.

One thought occured to me on this that is keeping balanced. And not doing things that could cause some off-balance somehow.

I might not have answered your question or may have said more than I had to, but anyway..There you go.
:D
 

Stanton Moore

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I tend to see people as almost infinite (that old saw: everyone's life could be the subject of a novel), so it's hard to look away, literally. For this reason (and a few others) I try to remain aloof most times.
 

SilkRoad

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I tend to see people as almost infinite (that old saw: everyone's life could be the subject of a novel), so it's hard to look away, literally. For this reason (and a few others) I try to remain aloof most times.

This is interesting but I don't quite understand. Do you mean that your perception of people's potential could lead you into a kind of danger? Or it's just too fascinating and time-consuming?
 

Stanton Moore

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This is interesting but I don't quite understand. Do you mean that your perception of people's potential could lead you into a kind of danger? Or it's just too fascinating and time-consuming?

If I look for too long, I become 'entangled', in their potential, suffering, etc; I want to know everything, I want to remove the scales from their eyes. This is a lot to take on, so I simply don't look so much...
Does that make sense?
 

SilkRoad

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If I look for too long, I become 'entangled', in their potential, suffering, etc; I want to know everything, I want to remove the scales from their eyes. This is a lot to take on, so I simply don't look so much...
Does that make sense?

Yeah, it does make sense, and I partly relate (at least to the "wanting to remove the scales from their eyes") bit.
 

Stanton Moore

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Yeah, it does make sense, and I partly relate (at least to the "wanting to remove the scales from their eyes") bit.

I know a therapist who said something similar. She said going to parties was difficult becuase she wants to know everyone, their stories, dreams... I wish she were single, because she entangles me too:)
 

SilkRoad

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I know a therapist who said something similar. She said going to parties was difficult becuase she wants to know everyone, their stories, dreams... I wish she were single, because she entangles me too:)

Perhaps it's actually one reason why I get tired around people? I think there's something bigger in there that I want to draw out...

I just wonder if I see potential where none exists. Or if there always actually is something there, if I'm accurate in that regard.
 

Stanton Moore

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Perhaps it's actually one reason why I get tired around people? I think there's something bigger in there that I want to draw out...

I just wonder if I see potential where none exists. Or if there always actually is something there, if I'm accurate in that regard.

My intuition tells that everyone is redeemable. You don't know if you're accurate until you know.
Perhaps you should become a therapist too.
 

skylights

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I echo [MENTION=5375]polikujm[/MENTION] in that "I personally care a lot less about happiness than I do about meaning or potential" - or at least, that meaning and potential for me are native routes to happiness. I am happy when exploring possibilities and creating meaning.

I don't really have the problem with entanglement... with the people I know well, I do see ways they could help themselves to be happier, but I'm not sure they're things that everyone doesn't see, too. For example, I think it's fairly clear that my dad needs to work on his anxiety levels; my mom needs to devote more time to herself; my manager needs to get over her narcissism.

nebbykoo said:
My intuition tells that everyone is redeemable. You don't know if you're accurate until you know.

I believe that everyone is redeemable, period. The question is more how than if - as well as what "redeemable" entails.
 

SilkRoad

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I've come to think that while everyone is redeemable, with some people you shouldn't get involved, because you cannot help them to that redemption.
 

Mia.

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I believe that everyone is redeemable, period. The question is more how than if - as well as what "redeemable" entails.

Yes. It also has to be something they themselves want, otherwise it doesn't matter how much support you provide, it isn't going to happen.
 

Cellmold

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I look at the potential in other people, get jealous and then I jump on em and squash them flat like a plastic toy.

 

Stanton Moore

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I've come to think that while everyone is redeemable, with some people you shouldn't get involved, because you cannot help them to that redemption.

Sometimes compassion is the spark to a fire, sometimes not. The spark is the same in both cases. But it takes a lot of energy to be a spark for others. I have done that with my family, and it was not easy to bear. I doubt I could be a therapist on that account.
 

SilkRoad

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Sometimes compassion is the spark to a fire, sometimes not. The spark is the same in both cases. But it takes a lot of energy to be a spark for others. I have done that with my family, and it was not easy to bear. I doubt I could be a therapist on that account.

There are those who will suck your energy and refuse to do anything for themselves, while expecting others to fill their black holes of need. I'm no longer interested in any kind of involvement with those sorts of people. It's debilitating and a waste of time. I have a lot of compassion but I am gradually developing some harder/faster cut-off points for it.

Sometimes it's hard to know when/where to draw the line, though. I would assume that even as a therapist, there comes a point when you kind of have to push the person to do it for themselves...
 

Turtledove

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[MENTION=7063]SilkRoad[/MENTION] Though there should be boundaries (and wisdom) when it comes to people and seeing potential in others, but I really think, Silky, that you have a big heart and wish I could do a little more like what you do.
 

SilkRoad

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[MENTION=7063]SilkRoad[/MENTION] Though there should be boundaries (and wisdom) when it comes to people and seeing potential in others, but I really think, Silky, that you have a big heart and wish I could do a little more like what you do.

Thank you! That was such a nice comment to read today. :)

I think so many things are about balance. Protecting yourself, but being open to other people. Caring about others but caring about yourself too...etc. That's why the words "balance"/"balanced" come up so often in my posts. :D
 
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