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  1. #111
    soft and silky sarah's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by toonia View Post
    My concern is that on iNuitive central, then INTPcentral, and now here, there is such an emphasis on valuing iNtuitive reasoning, that Sensing becomes a dumping ground for whatever thinking styles are rejected by the group as a whole. That is why we get these silly stereotypes like S's don't have a sense of humor, can't understand sarcasm, are unintelligent, etc. Of course people will assume they are an N instead when they are intelligent and enjoy sarcasm, etc. Also, it is very popular to consider oneself intuitive in the traditional use of the word. It implies special insight. Sensing is a word with less meaning to people in general. Sensors have a much richer pallet of reasoning than these boards suggest. I would just bet that if Sensing were treated with more respect and understood for all its diversity and depth that many posters here would realize they are not Ns at all. Many people who think they are infj's or think they know one would also discover a different type - and very often an ISFJ for example.

    INFJ and ISFJ are equal in value, both with specific strengths and weaknesses, but they are quite different. Perhaps the reason it seems important to raise this issue is that people don't often understand the infj, and by lumping in a bunch of other types, labeling them as infj, we get this confused mess and a bunch of people assuming they understand a type that they actually have no experience with whatsoever.
    Wow. I realize this was written a whole year ago, but I just want to say that this totally echoes the way I've thought for a long time! I believe many people have mistyped themselves and everyone they know, mainly because they really don't understand what it means to have a preference for iNtuition -- as opposed to using one's natural intuition to serve one's dominant preference for sening. How many times must it be written that everyone does both (in other words, uses their senses and their intuition) before the majority of people finally get it?

    I have been discussing type for about 5 years now (on another discussion group in Yahoogroups), and I can tell you how annoying it is to have people write to me personally to tell me I can't possibly have ISFP preferences because (a) I'm articulate, or (b) "Sensors don't understand about type anyway", or (c) I'm not boring them to tears, or (d) I'm thoughtful --apparently it's believed that if you prefer sensing, you can't think--, or (e) I'm "sensitive" --because apparently people believe if you prefer sensing, you can't have strong, passionate feelings either. Is it any wonder that if this is the layman's definition of what it means to prefer Sensing, then they will only notice "Sensing" in those who are acting stupid, thoughtless and boring? And that they will "type" anyone else they run into as preferring iNtuition, whether or not they actually do have that as a preference?

    so I end up saying to them, No, I don't prefer iNtuition. THIS is what a 37 year old college-educated ISFP who has lived around people of all types is like. Deal with it. Can't say I'm sorry if that blows your biased beliefs out of the water.

    There have been times I've been tempted to call myself an iNtuitive whenever I'm around type enthusiasts just so I can escape the negative labels that have been pinned onto my actual type, though I haven't actually done that, and I'd consider it a weakness. I'd much rather people stop believing all that crap about those of us who prefer Sensing. Although I can understand where the bias comes from (yes, we all know stupid people who never think and who only talk about the most boring things, and yes, they probably prefer Sensing), I don't think it actually helps anyone understand the people in their world better who prefer Sensing but who are also thoughtful and articulate, much less use psychological type to make relationships work better.

    All the hoards of people who profess "INFJ preferences" and who champion the INFJ type as being the "rarest" of the types and therefore the most desirable really amuses me because my mother does indeed have a preference for INFJ, and I highly doubt she'd think that the more glamorized type descriptions of her type really speak to the heart of who she is. If anything, her preference for introverted iNtuition has been something she's struggled with, and made peace with rather than championed as being the cool thing everybody ought to aspire to be. (By the way, instead of concrete, sensory pastimes, my mother spends most of her waking moments in Biblical study, prayer and contemplation. She'd have made a good nun. So much for glamorous idea that INFJs live these fabulous and romantic lives).

    Sarah
    ISFP

  2. #112
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    Quote Originally Posted by 01011010 View Post
    I think INJs spend the most time online. Well, INTPs too.
    18 hours a day, max. Except Saturday, we might pull an all-nighter.

    Quote Originally Posted by sarah View Post
    I can tell you how annoying it is to have people write to me personally to tell me I can't possibly have ISFP preferences because (a) I'm articulate, or (b) "Sensors don't understand about type anyway", or (c) I'm not boring them to tears, or (d) I'm thoughtful --apparently it's believed that if you prefer sensing, you can't think--, or (e) I'm "sensitive"
    I don't know what those people were thinking, that's all SJ stuff. I'm just kitten around.

  3. #113
    Senior Member cafe's Avatar
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    I don't even understand the appeal of a fabulous exciting life. I just wanted a nice husband, some healthy kids, a home of my own, and a comfortable life. Are INFJs supposed to want fabulous exciting lives?
    “There are two novels that can change a bookish fourteen-year old’s life: The Lord of the Rings and Atlas Shrugged. One is a childish fantasy that often engenders a lifelong obsession with its unbelievable heroes, leading to an emotionally stunted, socially crippled adulthood, unable to deal with the real world. The other, of course, involves orcs.”
    ~ John Rogers

  4. #114
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    Quote Originally Posted by cafe View Post
    I don't even understand the appeal of a fabulous exciting life. I just wanted a nice husband, some healthy kids, a home of my own, and a comfortable life. Are INFJs supposed to want fabulous exciting lives?
    Not in my book. I think introverts are pretty boring, especially myself.

  5. #115
    Senior Member cafe's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jack Flak View Post
    Not in my book. I think introverts are pretty boring, especially myself.
    Yeah, it seems to me that a fabulous, exciting life would interfere with reading my life away. My extroverted friends seem more interested in fabulousness and excitement.
    “There are two novels that can change a bookish fourteen-year old’s life: The Lord of the Rings and Atlas Shrugged. One is a childish fantasy that often engenders a lifelong obsession with its unbelievable heroes, leading to an emotionally stunted, socially crippled adulthood, unable to deal with the real world. The other, of course, involves orcs.”
    ~ John Rogers

  6. #116
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    Quote Originally Posted by cafe View Post
    Yeah, it seems to me that a fabulous, exciting life would interfere with reading my life away. My extroverted friends seem more interested in fabulousness and excitement.
    That's why I love them. It provides balance to my boring existence. E and I go so well together.

  7. #117
    Senior Member Rachelinpa's Avatar
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    I agree. I would almost prefer being the E in the relationship. But more than that, I would prefer being the F. Woohoo!

  8. #118
    Senior Member edcoaching's Avatar
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    Just so long as the E's let me finish my book before dragging me anywhere.

    Had a great clash of realities last night. We were correcting 7th grade papers and one question was "IF you could be any TV character, which one would you choose and why?" My ESTP husband said, "If I were answering this I'd choose host on one of those fishing guide shows, and get paid to have fun." I just cracked up because I of course want to be Counselor on the Enterprise...Makes those INFJs really hard to find...
    edcoaching

  9. #119
    4x9 cascadeco's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by edcoaching View Post
    Just so long as the E's let me finish my book before dragging me anywhere.

    Had a great clash of realities last night. We were correcting 7th grade papers and one question was "IF you could be any TV character, which one would you choose and why?" My ESTP husband said, "If I were answering this I'd choose host on one of those fishing guide shows, and get paid to have fun." I just cracked up because I of course want to be Counselor on the Enterprise...Makes those INFJs really hard to find...
    Interesting! See, and I kinda think I'd want to be on a show like Lost. Total adventure.

    I've always felt rather 'split', though, in the sense that half of myself does crave stability, and comfort, a place to call home, and security, whereas the other half gets totally bored by that and wants a life of adventure and intrigue. ;-) It makes things..decision-making and planning..a bit more challenging for me, because I don't think I can ever fully satisfy all of my desires/needs. Fulfilling 60% of what I want means the other 40% isn't getting fulfilled..that sorta thing.
    "...On and on and on and on he strode, far out over the sands, singing wildly to the sea, crying to greet the advent of the life that had cried to him." - James Joyce

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  10. #120
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    I started a thread in Bonfire re: what TV character everyone would like to be. Thanks, edcoaching.

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