Q for the Is

[Jack Flak]

that's interesting.
do you ever enjoy brainstorming with others though or is it important to have a well established idea before you discuss it?

I'll discuss incomplete ideas with people, but it doesn't seem that I can ever refine an idea completely while in a dialect. I have to retreat.

 

[Lady_X]

^^ oh right...i don't either.

 

[Jack Flak]

^^ oh right...i don't either.

I don't understand, are you saying you behave like I do in those circumstances?

 

[Lady_X]

not exactly but when i'm brainstorming...i put incomplete thoughts out there and hear others thoughts and expand my view in contrast to theirs...but i wouldn't say my opinion is solidified until i've thought more about it.

 

[Xander]

The core of the problem is merely maintaining the connection between the people. Introverts seem to require little energy to remain comfortable, they seem happy as long as I'm occasionally speaking to them or engaging upon their interests where as extraverts seem to emit a kind of ping.. in networking terminology introverts are passively waiting for a connection where as extraverts continuously ping all available connections to "see if they're still listening". That alone can tire me out. Usually not through them doing it though... more me expecting them to do it.

It's not a hard and fast rule though... it seems that only those extraverts who are hiding their uncertainty that do this to any great extent. Those who seem continually concerned whether people really like them or not... and no I'm not referring to my long suffering ENFP friend.

 

[Athenian200]

Let's see if we can break down this shizzle.

As introverts (and particularly "INTJs" and "INTPs"), what makes you feel drained socially, and how do you experience it in real time?

I'm an Introvert. What makes me feel drained is trying to keep up appearances and pay attention to what other people are doing in general. Basically, the boringness of not being able to let my mind wander too far from people and the present situation. It drains me much more quickly on days when I'm anxious/anticipating something, feel curious about something, or want to think about something... and much more slowly on days when I'm bored and feeling empty-headed.

With people who know me very well and "get" me, though, the energy needed to be around them decreases significantly.

 

[INTJMom]

...
As introverts (and particularly "INTJs" and "INTPs"), what makes you feel drained socially, and how do you experience it in real time?

what - having to talk to people, be around people, listen to people

how - After a couple of hours, I feel emotionally exhausted. I feel physically tired and drained.
I feel an intense desire to be alone in peace and quiet.
When I get alone in peace and quiet, the quiet actually feels good to my ears. It's a huge relief.

 

[Tiltyred]

I just can't talk about something I don't care about -- the weather, what did you do over the weekend (none of your business), etc. Also there is a lot of jockeying for position in conversations, and it drives me nuts when one person keeps interrupting the other person or pulling them off their own topic. But if someone does engage me about something personal, then I'm right there with them, feeling everything they say and sometimes tearing up in the sad parts, and then I'm exhausted because I've been listening so hard. So it's a combination of trying to decipher communication that doesn't mean what its words say, or being 100 involved in communication that does mean something to someone else and feeling connected but after awhile, overwhelmed, and with a need to just sit with it for a bit. Also I can't stand anxiety, if people babble when there's a quiet space, or insist I talk when I have nothing to say and I'm taking a break and doing some people watching, for example, which to me is very entertaining.

 

[placebo]

Let's see if we can break down this shizzle.

As introverts (and particularly "INTJs" and "INTPs"), what makes you feel drained socially, and how do you experience it in real time?

What -- sometimes just sheer length of time, after awhile, even if I want to enjoy it, I feel tired. My mind and body wants to be alone.

Other times I'm drained from bad, unfulfilling conversation--sometimes the awkwardness of finding something to discuss or finding something to say (I'm a terrible conversationalist), or tolerating the seemingly drawn-out trivial conversations that take place among others.

Trying not to look bored as hell, as in, trying to be a bit peppy, smiling, putting a tone in my voice, so I don't seem like such a downer or depressed all the time.

I get drained paying attention to or being aware of all the people around me too, if there are many--it can be hard to block out and just tiring.


How -- I guess I feel it when my brain is absolutely nowhere or just thinking about how drained I feel. You just feel it--sometimes I GOTTA go somewhere isolated in the middle of something just to regain some mental/physical composure and a little refreshment. Being alone can feel SO good.

 

[mippus]

What: having to interact with people that drain me, mostly because thay are intrusive and not interesting or fun to me. It is the "having to interact" that is horrible. Often combined with not having an overview of my surroundings, i.e. what happens when you are in large groups. Further: the noise a group can make and the demand (we may deny it but it is there) to play a role. I still do not get how this is different to extraverts

How: it starts with irritation, the need to escape. But when I find that this is impossible, irritation turns into some (introverted, of course) anger and then exhaustion, litterally: feeling tired and getting a headache.

 

[bluebell]

I'll discuss incomplete ideas with people, but it doesn't seem that I can ever refine an idea completely while in a dialect. I have to retreat.

That's the same for me but I still don't particularly find it fun/easy to discuss incomplete ideas. I've learnt to do it because I'm forced into it at times at work but one of my most hated things is being asked '[bluebell], what do you think?' when it's about something new that I haven't had a chance to think through by myself. I work in a team of about 20 people and nearly everyone I work with prefers to talk things through to solve problems. I also dislike verbal brainstorming sessions most of the time.

When I get alone in peace and quiet, the quiet actually feels good to my ears. It's a huge relief.

Especially if I've been around really *loud* people.

 

[Jack Flak]

Oh, I don't "enjoy" it either, but if I think of something when I'm with someone, I tend to mention it.

 

[Orangey]

That's the same for me but I still don't particularly find it fun/easy to discuss incomplete ideas. I've learnt to do it because I'm forced into it at times at work but one of my most hated things is being asked '[bluebell], what do you think?' when it's about something new that I haven't had a chance to think through by myself. I work in a team of about 20 people and nearly everyone I work with prefers to talk things through to solve problems. I also dislike verbal brainstorming sessions most of the time.

 

[01011010]

Having to speak. Why can't I just hang out in silence?

 

[Thursday]

Having to speak. Why can't I just hang out in silence?

they don't get Fi/Ni

 

[Jack Flak]

(Introversion)

 

[Thursday]

(Introversion)

(sexy)

 

[Jack Flak]

(sexy)

(WHOOOA THERE BUDDY lol)

 

[Thursday]

(WHOOOA THERE BUDDY lol)

Word association

 

[Jack Flak]

Word association

Hehe well that's good.