Q for the Is

[aguanile]

One of the things that drains me the most is pretending to be interested. Or, even if I am interested, feeling like I have to display that. I think this is a large part of the reason why I never really get drained around close friends.

Oh this is so my problem. I feel like I have to be fake or dramatic in order for other people to feel at ease. This is why I hate small talk. I abhor small talk. As I sit there feigning fascination at the various activities of my coworker's grandchild or how the weekend was, my face goes catatonic and eventually the poor victim of my indifference walks away perplexed.

On the other hand, I am energized by hanging out with my friends.

 

[raz]

It's weird being an I sometimes, though. I'm sitting in a library, and a girl walks up and says, "you look lonely." Thanks to MBTI though, I now know she's at least an ExFJ from the conversation. Heh.

 

[King sns]

It's weird being an I sometimes, though. I'm sitting in a library, and a girl walks up and says, "you look lonely." Thanks to MBTI though, I now know she's at least an ExFJ from the conversation. Heh.

She could have walked up to any type and said "you look lonely", though, right? And I would expect an E to look more lonely. Why would this situation be specific to an I?

(yes, I know its pick on Raz night, I already got you on the christmas gift thread )

 

[Alpha Prime]

Is your friend a J?

Yes

 

[INTJMom]

Yes

I can completely relate to your description of your friend.
I do the very same thing myself at times.
I would just say that it's a NEED.
I MUST block everything else out or I won't accomplish my goal.
And the goal is probably very important to me if I go to that extreme.

 

[Llewellyn]

Certainly the enduring strain of deciding my attitude towards people. The constant insecurity about that, the tendency to divert away, not look at the person enough (I recently found that out), feeling uncomfortable in relation to the other, most of the time thinking I might do something strange or something unpleasant to the person (like laughing at them).

I'm pretty content at that description, myself (Not with the actual situation though).

Edit: it's a relief even to have said this.

Only recently have I come to (or restored) being able to shift into that 'contact point' of someone, so that I'm in touch without discomfort.

 

[saieditor]

Thank you all, for your interesting responses!

You izz welcome!

Time to crank it up some!

Ooh goody, I haven't seen a motor car cranked up to start since I last saw my father do it in 1955. It was a Ford model T something or other.

1. Nearly all of you have suggested that it is human interaction that drains you, like an ice cube in a hot oven. I wonder, if you had to deal with something interactive (void of human contact) or rich in external sensory data, would that too make you feel drained?

No, but then again, beware the preferences. SP's can do repetitive activity endlessly, Introverted or not.

You need to look to the last letter of the type which tells you the face to the world. That's how we deal with the world. That includes that which is void of human contact; the world is there, wherefrom does the energy come?

I can put in very long days on the computer, but I find I still need time out to recharge the batteries, or they become very depleted. Creativity can be depleted by computers, also.

2. Awrite, check this shit out: I propose that INXX-people are more easily drained than ISXX-people, because the N-function is trying to get the big picture (therefore taking in more information/interactive data). Yay or nay? And whay?

I think you need to understand that the first letter tells you where people get energised, or how they get energised. Introverts, generally, resource their energy from within. How that happens is different from person to person as they will have different strategies to access energy, if at all aware that they do this.

I am ISTJ in the outer world and INTJ in my inner world; I don't see any difference in what drains me, but I do find that if I don't have time out, the energy seeps away.

3. I have an introvert friend who claims that in order to maintain his "energy" for longer periods he is completely focused on his mission, whatever that is. He "cuts off" people (and everything else, that is irrelevant to his mission). Again, lemme pick your brains on this one!

I rather think this is a matter of personal choice, and how someone chooses to maintain their inner strength. That is a matter of personal self discipline, and of course, how you deal with people and situations where you are drained or feel off course. You have to understand that Introverts can floor unsuspecting Extroverts with their inner depths and how they perceive situations and people. Not everything is on the surface, you know.


I notice you have XXXX as your type.
In Australia, we have a beer called XXXX

Is this your secret?