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Thread: Q for the Is

  1. #11

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    The expectations of others.

  2. #12
    Don't Judge Me! Haphazard's Avatar
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    Being with other people (particularly more than one) for more than a few hours at a time is awful. I don't mean like at school or at work, but outside of it where people expect you to talk. Even if I bring things to do, especially if we're just sitting, I gradually get more impatient until I get to the point where I'm tapping my foot and I just want to tear my skin off.

    I guess it's just that other people are too slow. It grates on me.
    -Carefully taking sips from the Fire Hose of Knowledge

  3. #13
    Per Ardua Metamorphosis's Avatar
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    One of the things that drains me the most is pretending to be interested. Or, even if I am interested, feeling like I have to display that. I think this is a large part of the reason why I never really get drained around close friends.
    "You will always be fond of me. I represent to you all the sins you never had the courage to commit."

    Reason is, and ought only to be the slave of the passions, and can never pretend to any other office
    than to serve and obey them. - David Hume

  4. #14
    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jack Flak View Post
    How I'll describe my introversion, at this point in time:

    I'm relatively self-contained, and real-world interaction interferes with the circuit of thought I'm most comfortable with. If alone, I have a thought, and bounce it around for a while, coming to some conclusion. If interacting with others, I have to deal with alien data which interrupts the circuit, and I'm compelled to entertain these thoughts as well. It becomes tiring, and after a while I feel a strong need to go off by myself to sort out extraneous data, and finish all trains of thought.

    I theorize that extroverts' circuits are naturally incomplete, and thus they seek out interaction to enhance their own thoughts.
    that's interesting.
    do you ever enjoy brainstorming with others though or is it important to have a well established idea before you discuss it?

    i will say your theory is somewhat true for me. it depends on the subject matter...some things i feel very strongly about and my opinions about them are pretty well defined...but when thinking about new concepts i do like to bounce around...look for similarities or contrast to help me define them clearly.
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

  5. #15
    Senior Member Grayscale's Avatar
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    socializing is stressful with people who dont understand me. i can usually understand them, and maybe they enjoy it, but if we are on different levels it requires a lot of extra thinking on my part and that is tiring


    this isnt related to understanding communication, but it's things like this that make socializing tiring:

    person: what are you doing this weekend?
    me: i dunno
    several minutes later...
    person: so any plans this weekend?
    me: im not sure yet
    person: are you going to do something with your friends? or maybe X activity?
    me (trying to contain my annoyance): you know, im really not sure, i havent decided yet
    later on in the day...
    person: hey we're gonna do XYZ activity... want to come?
    me: no thanks
    person: oh are you doing something else? i thought you said you didn't have anything planned

    at this point i am tired of this person on many levels... the fact that they aren't listening to me the that i sense they might have been manipulative. there are usually a lot of things about a person or a group of people im with that rub me the wrong way and it's almost a headache to try and think of how to deal with them all at once.

  6. #16
    Senior Member Misty_Mountain_Rose's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Alpha Prime View Post
    Let's see if we can break down this shizzle.

    As introverts (and particularly "INTJs" and "INTPs"), what makes you feel drained socially, and how do you experience it in real time?
    Small talk is nearly physically painful sometimes. If I'm in a good mood I can stand it in very (VERY) brief spurts and then I think of an escape plan. I deliberately avoid being in elevators with other people because they may expect me to talk... and if they don't, the silence is unnerving.

    I can do OK if I'm in a 'party' kind of mind-set, especially if I'm drinking. After a few beers I will walk around and introduce myself to everyone (sometimes repeatedly depending on the number of drinks) and having all kinds of fun with random strangers.

    The worst times are when I'm around people who I feel I need to 'behave' in front of. (IE Clients at work) Times where I cannot be my normal, looney self without censoring and worrying about what people will think will wear me out. I have a LOT of random thoughts and ridiculous moments during a day, and if I have to maintain that conformism mentality for even a few hours I feel like I need to run screaming down the street.

    Sometimes, depending on the company, I go to the opposite extreme and feel the need to fill that void of silence and so I play the 'hostess', even where it is not called for. In this mode, I tend to laugh a lot, make small jokes and try to keep the conversation light-hearted and interesting... but after a while if no one else picks up the ball I tend to end up with my foot in my mouth, as if my brain just goes on strike and Weird Misty appears and says something really, really humiliating or inappropriate.

    Embrace the possibilities.

  7. #17
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    Moved from Bonfire.

  8. #18
    Occasional Member Evan's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Alpha Prime View Post
    Let's see if we can break down this shizzle.

    As introverts (and particularly "INTJs" and "INTPs"), what makes you feel drained socially, and how do you experience it in real time?
    The world imposes on me.

  9. #19
    Earth Exalted Thursday's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Alpha Prime View Post
    As introverts:what makes you feel drained socially, and how do you experience it in real time?
    The incessant and fervant talking about nothing.
    Putting other people's business in the street.
    Alcohol/drug abuse<-----i loathe losnig control of myself
    Being a ray of sunshine for more than i actually am
    Asking people how they've been when i clearly don't care.
    etc.
    I N V I C T U S

  10. #20
    Senior Member bluebell's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Grayscale View Post
    socializing is stressful with people who dont understand me. i can usually understand them, and maybe they enjoy it, but if we are on different levels it requires a lot of extra thinking on my part and that is tiring
    It's similar for me. I tend to think fast but only on my terms. If I'm pushed to speak about something that I haven't thought through, I find it really tiring to have to speak as I'm thinking.
    ...so much smoke pouring out of each chromosome.

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