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  1. #11
    The High Priestess Amargith's Avatar
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    Yes. My family doesn't do feelings, at least not publicly. To show them is a sign of weakness to them, especially my dad (though he cannot really control his own emotions, which he very much denies). It took moving out and finding other people like me to realize that it is ok to have strong feelings and rely on them. Before that, I felt miserable and insecure as I wasn't able to keep up with their 'logic' competitions, and was repeatedly told to supress my feelings as they were of no real importance, by just about everyone except my mom. I love my family, but I dread spending more than one day with them, for obvious reasons (with the exception of my mom and to my older brother who isn't as judgemental). It's one of the reasons I'm here. I'm trying to find a way to communicate with them in a less destructive way
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  2. #12
    Senior Member Kestrel's Avatar
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    My family definitely has influenced my personality. I consider myself pretty damn lucky to have an INFJ mother. We understand each other almost entirely.

    If nothing else her influence (along with some others) has reinforced my values and integrity. Essentially, I'm an INFJ^2.

    My brother however has not been so lucky. He's an ISTP and even though he can relate easily to the greater population he can't relate to either of my parents (ISFJ dad also) very well.

    I think learning about MBTI has helped me understand and appreciate SPs in ways I hadn't really been able to before.

  3. #13
    soft and silky sarah's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Beat View Post
    Me and the brother below me are sensors. My youngest bro, sister and mom/dad are Intuitive. Everyone except myself is a Feeler. lol

    My sister could relate to you, Beat -- she's an ISTJ stuck in a family full of Feelers. She says she wishes she could just ONCE get into an emotion-free discussion with people in our family about literature or politics or current events, but it rarely happens because people get all vehement and passionate. Luckily she has some good friends who prefer Thinking.

    I'm heavily influenced by my INFJ mother, and I think I developed tertiary Ni at an earlier age than I would otherwise have. I credit my struggle to understand my mom as the reason I was attracted to so many NF men all throughout my teens and 20s. I eventually married an ENFJ, whom my sister refers to as the "the son Mom never had until now."

    Sarah

  4. #14
    wholly charmed Spartacuss's Avatar
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    Yes. I'm alone in a family of feelers - nice, non-malicious feelers. Sometimes I've felt like the mean and evil one. I was definitely the cranky one. *does ebenezer scrooge* But I've learned the rational importance of taking an entire situation into consideration - including other people's reasoning, feelings and how they are likely to react. With any luck I'll get good enough at it that I don't make too many poor judgement calls because of situational myopia.
    Ti (43); Ne (41.8); Te (33.7); Fi (30.5); Ni (27.5); Se (24.7); Si (21.5); Fe (17.3)
    The More You Know the Less You Need. - Aboriginal Saying

  5. #15
    soft and silky sarah's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kestrel View Post
    I think learning about MBTI has helped me understand and appreciate SPs in ways I hadn't really been able to before.
    SPs like me love Intuitives who use the MBTI to understand and appreicate us more. Thank you. I'm doing my absolute best to return the favor to NFs and NTs. The intent to improve my relationship with my INFJ mother was what got interested in this subject in the first place.

    Sarah

  6. #16
    IRL is not real Cimarron's Avatar
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    I think it definitely affects it over so many years and experiences. My family members actually all have pretty similar types, very STJ overall. A stubborn pack.

    My mom had a huge Feeler influence on me, like others have said. She and I (ISFJ and ISTJ) have always agreed on a lot of stuff and really understood each other, but we have different ways of handling things. Learning compromise over my teenage years was something I'm thankful for.

    My dad and I (both ISTJs) have always gotten along fine. We just never have much to talk about together. We try to find common interests, because we want to talk to each other, but it doesn't happen on its own.

    My oldest sister and our dad (INTJ and ISTJ) have gotten very argumentative in recent years about her future, living on her own, etc. It seems that the way they resolve it is to just try to not spend too much time cooped up in the same place. I have developed pretty much the same relationship with her as with Dad, where we want to talk to each other, but just don't have common ground and aren't great conversation-starters.

    My youngest sister (ESxJ?) must feel so alone: she's the only Extravert in our family. We love her outgoing attitude.
    You can't spell "justice" without ISTJ.

  7. #17
    pathwise dependent FDG's Avatar
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    No, not all of my family is composed of sensors, but most of them do come from a background which is slightly different - almost none went to high school, only one completed college, etc.
    My father is ISTJ and my mother is ISFJ, however I do not think that they have influenced my development a lot, although I do think that I have tried to take on qualities from my father (my mother is somewhat neurotic, and I am extremely low on neuroticism, so I don't find her behaviors to be compatible with my personality). He's very calm and usually quite optimistic about things, and usually very kind. My mother is an OK person, but she takes up too many obligations that she cannot handle, and thus she tends to become very unhappy and snappy from time to time. Sometimes she tries to find "feeling" motivations to my actions, whereas often they're just not there.
    Since I was 6, I spent the greatest majority of my day outside, that's why I think they couldn't influence me a lot.
    ENTj 7-3-8 sx/sp

  8. #18
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    Being the only feeler in the family, yes it has.
    Thinking back now, it took me awhile to develope Fe.. It took me awhile to realise and accept (as feeling are considered a weakness and nothing to base decisions on in my family) that I'm a highly emotional person and in touch with my emotions. I had known that I was values driven, which my family found rather weird. And lacking of any and all sense, not good reactions. I don't normally show much emotion, and people call me calm and cool in a detached way. I still don't show much emotion, unless I let it pass throught the filter first.

    My mom (ISTJ) refers to me as a stubborn ass often, I wonder just where I've gotten that from.. Or maybe it was dad.
    On the other hand, she did make me rather organized person. Underwear in sock draver? Never!
    I'm grungingly giving my INTP dad credit for improving my thinking. We did argue about politics and economy etc. pretty much.
    Also, because of my brother I have an appreciation towards the SPs.
    Last edited by sade; 11-16-2008 at 09:59 AM.

  9. #19
    Senior Member mlittrell's Avatar
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    mom = INFJ, dad = INTJ, sister = ESTJ

    my dad helps me with development of Te quite a bit. my mom keeps me motivated. my sister and i are best friends. my half bro is an INTJ but i rarely see him. in a function sense my dad has helped me develop the most but i would never get crap done without my mom.
    "Honest differences are often a healthy sign of progress. "

    "You must not lose faith in humanity. Humanity is an ocean; if a few drops of the ocean are dirty, the ocean does not become dirty."

    "An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind."

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  10. #20
    Senior Member Ism's Avatar
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    Well, my mom tests as an ESFJ, and I grew up only with her as an only child, so it might have had some impact, though mostly negative, on my part.

    She's very leniant (and balanced), I suppose you could say, and I sometimes take advantage of that. So, I just act as that kid that pretty much does nothing around the house and asks her to do a lot of things for me or my way, unfortunately.

    I try to watch myself more often, though, because we share a great relationship, never argue, and laugh a lot.

    All in all, I think the only way her personality has influenced my personality is that I'm probably more... idle than I would have been under another roof. Though, this could be traced back to my much younger years when my very generous grandmother doted on me and I pretty much did nothing, so activity level was looww, hoo hoo. My mother might have reinforced this.

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