Keirsey's soulmates: ENFJ/INTP

[Domino]

Originally Posted by Snail

painful

How did you respond?

Yes.

Again, how did you respond? I can't imagine an INFP complying with that sort of egotistical terraforming.

Moreso than she was, but it was an individual difference, not a type thing. He considered me more intellectually qualified than she was, but emotionally weaker.

How so? Because you're Fi-primary? Did he outrightly say this to you? How did you respond?

I was saying that I don't buy into the idea that all Introverts are smarter. In this case, it was an individual difference, probably because her mother got drunk a lot when she was pregnant. I'm saying that a normal ENFJ should be plenty intelligent to deal with an INTP as an equal.

I will concede. I was astonished to meet a stupid INTJ and yet it happened.

I've known competitive ENTPs who are arrogant about their intelligence, too. I think it has everything to do with the individuals involved.

ENTPs are their own kettle of fish. I hear Ne-existential loops are a real killer.

That's cool. If you like being boiled in oil, I won't try to stop you.

How considerate. I've always wanted to try snails too.

Originally Posted by MacGuffin

The thread title was an invite!

*lays out D-Con*

ENFJs: how do you define "soulmate"? If you think INTP is a great match, how much of a "mindmate" do you want to be?

This again?! Fusion just IS. You better be a smart man/clown or I'm not stopping.

Originally Posted by Snail

Beautifully stated!

I thank you!

Originally Posted by Usehername

I think she's just referring to the illogical assumption that any one human, regardless of who that human is, could possibly be thoroughly enjoyed by every single other human on the planet. Prolly one of those xxTx moments where the logic filter is grating against her brain loudly.

I love you.

[MacGuffin]

Originally Posted by PinkPiranha

This again?! Fusion just IS. You better be a smart man/clown or I'm not stopping.

Fusion is the easy part. What comes after, that's the difficult part. Then the Keirsey roles will come out more starkly.

[Domino]

Originally Posted by MacGuffin

Fusion is the easy part. What comes after, that's the difficult part. Then the Keirsey roles will come out more starkly.

I'm trying to be clear - I can't fuse with someone that hasn't hit every button on the control panel. Mentally. Physically. Emotionally. Whatever. All of it. The nuclear reaction ISN'T the easy part. It's the end result of an entirely instinctive process that rarely occurs.

[MacGuffin]

Originally Posted by PinkPiranha

I'm trying to be clear - I can't fuse with someone that hasn't hit every button on the control panel. Mentally. Physically. Emotionally. Whatever. All of it. The nuclear reaction ISN'T the easy part. It's the end result of an entirely instinctive process that rarely occurs.

Has it ever happened then?

If so, why didn't it work out?

[Domino]

Originally Posted by MacGuffin

Has it ever happened then?

Yes. Just three times.

If so, why didn't it work out?

1. Drug addict.

2. Engaged and I didn't know it until it was too late to extricate myself.

3. MARRIED. Big no-no.

[Snail]

Originally Posted by PinkPiranha

How did you respond?

I cried a lot and he saw it as an act of defiance.

Again, how did you respond? I can't imagine an INFP complying with that sort of egotistical terraforming.

I argued passionately for my right to be myself and ended up in threatening, hostile situations trying to debate him for acceptance.

How so? Because you're Fi-primary? Did he outrightly say this to you? How did you respond?

Yes, and he said so cruelly and often. Usually when he bullied me about it, I cried, which only validated his beliefs about me being emotionally weak.

I will concede. I was astonished to meet a stupid INTJ and yet it happened.

I've only met one INTJ in real life, and only briefly. I'd like to study more of them. I know one online that I like a lot and would consider one of my favorite people at globalchatter.com. But I'll stop going off-topic now and answer your next statement.

ENTPs are their own kettle of fish. I hear Ne-existential loops are a real killer.

I've got an unexpectedly high amount of Ne according to the cognitive processes test, and I can certainly relate to that, even being an INFP.

How considerate. I've always wanted to try snails too.

[MacGuffin]

Originally Posted by PinkPiranha

Yes. Just three times.

Three times doesn't seem that rare.

Some people around here haven't found one yet.

[ygolo]

Originally Posted by PinkPiranha

I'm trying to be clear - I can't fuse with someone that hasn't hit every button on the control panel. Mentally. Physically. Emotionally. Whatever. All of it. The nuclear reaction ISN'T the easy part. It's the end result of an entirely instinctive process that rarely occurs.

It's this level of passion I find intriguing in Fe dom's. If they are good people also, it is also a source of great admiration and respect for me too-- This "wearing their heart on their sleves."

But I have to be honest when I say that I have never felt that level of passion for anything myself, and that is part of the draw(and the fear).

I feel I am at my best when calm and collected. I don't really function well when worked-up. So I tend to drive myself towards a "peace-of-mind."

The problem with this striving is that peace-of-mind, and apathetic are very close together states.

Perhaps my soul yearns for a way to avoid apathy, while still being calm. To be frank, sometimes I could use a good kick in the rear. But only if it is done with love AND respect will it be appreciated.

The other major issue is, I have no clue what it is that I (can) give an ExFJ. I don't like to be a free-loader.

[Domino]

Originally Posted by Snail

I cried a lot and he saw it as an act of defiance.

I argued passionately for my right to be myself and ended up in threatening, hostile situations trying to debate him for acceptance.

Yes, and he said so cruelly and often. Usually when he bullied me about it, I cried, which only validated his beliefs about me being emotionally weak.

Unbelievable! I'm appalled and angered. I'm glad you are no longer with this person! No way did you deserve to be Pygmalioned. It's a basic human right to be oneself, sole-proprietor. Shame on him. For shame! Crying is NOT a sign of weakness, and acceptance should be granted, not begged for. Ever!

I hope there are better days ahead of you? Perhaps with someone kind and engaging who enjoys nudibranches?

I've only met one INTJ in real life, and only briefly. I'd like to study more of them. I know one online that I like a lot and would consider one of my favorite people at globalchatter.com. But I'll stop going off-topic now and answer your next statement.

INTJs are generally delightful, clever people. I highly recommend them.

[Littlelostnf]

Originally Posted by PinkPiranha

I don't know that I've ever asked: Have you ever dated an INTP, LLNF?

Way long story....I'll pm ya about it.