Do Extraverts hate Extraversion?

[Magic Poriferan]

It's pretty widely agreed that Introverts are a disenfranchised minority of society, and as such, there's a great deal of information about the "problem" of Introversion and how to "fix" it.
This actually sinks into the minds of a lot of Introverts, and they become ashamed of themselves, and more admiring of other Extraverts than other Introverts.

Well, I wonder, does this kind of thing ever happen to Extraverts in this out-going society of ours?
I ask all you E's out there:

Are there aspects of Extraverted behavior in others that really irritate you/put you off?

Are there qualities of Extraversion that you are critical of in yourself?

Two additional, somewhat unrelated questions:

Do you often feel like there is a prejudice against you among Introverts?

Would you say Introverts aggravate you a great deal?

[SillySapienne]

I am a self-hating extrovert who prefers introverts to extroverts on most days and in most regards.

People seem to appreciate my extroversion, coolness, I say.

Talking is fun, writing is better (imo).

Introverts are awesome because they don't often offend your personal space in a public place.

I think it's pretty safe to assume that nobody likes the loud and obnoxious guy/girl, although, except on days where I happen to feel ill, I happen to find them more offensively amusing than emotionally taxing.

[substitute]

Are there aspects of Extraverted behavior in others that really irritate you/put you off?

Sometimes, yes... some people seem to think that if you're their friend, you should be friends with all their other friends too, and don't seem to respect or comprehend someone's right to choose their own friends. I've had some infuriating 'episodes' with one or two people like that, who've called my lack of desire to socialize with their friends "hurtful" and even seen it as an insult not only to their friends, but to them!!

Are there qualities of Extraversion that you are critical of in yourself?

Tendency to speak before thinking sometimes often; easily frustrated by lack of stimulation; tendency to talk the hind legs off the unfortunate person I first accost after a period of enforced silence/inaction; sometimes too quick to confront openly; deliberately kicking over tables so I can watch the chips fly, catch and rearrange them, just to see if I can, just because I'm bored.

Do you often feel like there is a prejudice against you among Introverts?

Most definitely. But it's getting better with the ones here as I think they're learning more about us that challenges their prior conceptions.

Would you say Introverts aggravate you a great deal?

Sometimes - just sometimes it seems there's a sorta double standard, whereby their need for solitude and "me time" is more important and valid than my need for interaction and company - they expect me to respect their need and say I'm annoying if I don't. It feels to me as though I've far more often foregone an introvert's company when I've really needed it in order to respect this need of theirs, than an introvert has foregone their solitude when they needed it in order to keep me company.

In fact in the population in general, not just extraverts, I think there's a general sorta tendency to look down on a person's need for company unless it's at an actual crisis time. Y'know, like if someone's just been bereaved or suffered something awful, people will say it's fair enough that they want some company and put aside their quiet times to comfort them and be with them. But if you just need some company because you're getting frustrated and stuff from lacking people-stimulation (and that can honestly lead an extravert to feel VERY sad, to the point of depression even), you're told you're a big baby and don't need people to "hold your hand". Especially if you're male.

[Magic Poriferan]

Originally Posted by substitute

you're getting frustrated and stuff from lacking people-stimulation (and that can honestly lead an extravert to feel VERY sad, to the point of depression even)

Oh, I'm well aware.
I have an ENFP friend who definitely has that need. For some strange reason though, she always wants to deny it.
Perhaps it is because of this anti-company mentality you speak of?

[substitute]

Yeah, there's a definite bias towards an idea that people should be completely independent in Western society. That's why I sometimes get on my soapbox about individualism being a mean ol' bogey and interdependence being a more natural human inclination.

[whatever]

Are there aspects of Extraverted behavior in others that really irritate you/put you off?

I'm annoyed when people who I don't know well insist on hugging me upon seeing me. People who are too friendly straight off the bat- I just don't TRUST them- it's not like I know them or anything so why are they acting like we've known each other for ages?!?

Are there qualities of Extraversion that you are critical of in yourself?

I talk too much, I disclose too much information, I get bored when stuck at home with nobody to talk to, I talk to people in the line at the grociery store and probably drive my customers crazy by keeping up conversation with them the whole time they're in my line, I often get caught up in judging myself based on others and how they see me... several things- I do like being an extrovert though!


Do you often feel like there is a prejudice against you among Introverts?

I think that I drive some introverts crazy by talking so much and such, but I hope not! A good number of my friends are introverts, as are both of my parents, so I hope that I've learned to tone down the exhuberance some to suit them better!

Would you say Introverts aggravate you a great deal?

only the ones who I have to DRAG a conversation out of and we're the only 2 people in a room I ask questions that are supposed to be open ended- I'm willing to do more than my part to get a conversation going- yes or no is NOT a sufficient answer!

[nemo]

Are there aspects of Extraverted behavior in others that really irritate you/put you off?

First off, I make a distinction between silliness and stupidity. That said, some extroverts can be flamboyantly stupid. That annoys me. I thrive off silliness though.

But in general? No -- nothing really irritates me. It's a person by person thing.

Are there qualities of Extraversion that you are critical of in yourself?

This is sort of a double-edged sword, but I have a bit of a dependence on external things/people/situations/projects to keep me entertained. On the one hand, it's not always possible to be out romping around with my latest fascination, and if I don't get to play with any of my new toys I get BOOOREEED and want to die. But on the other hand I stay pretty active and involved.

Also, I can be awkward in some social settings. I think NT has something to do with that, though.

Do you often feel like there is a prejudice against you among Introverts?


Sort of. I think some introverts have the wrong idea about what extroversion is, and associate it with status-conscious, sociable, shallow people with little or no inner lives. Extroverts just direct energy outwards -- sometimes it hits people, sometimes it doesn't. I think many introverts would be surprised how asocial an extrovert can be.

Would you say Introverts aggravate you a great deal?

Nope. I <3 them. I actually think that in general I'm irritated by extroverts more than introverts!

[Ezra]

Originally Posted by Magic Poriferan

Are there aspects of Extraverted behavior in others that really irritate you/put you off?

The loud, obnoxious abrasiveness of them, despite the fact that I often exhibit this behaviour. Hypocritical, but at least I sometimes attempt to tone it down, and I see the benefits of solitude.

Are there qualities of Extraversion that you are critical of in yourself?

Those I've described above. Besides that, I appreciate everything about myself in terms of Extraversion. I'm not horribly Extraverted; I have an Introverted side too, which is a quality thing to have in my eyes.

Do you often feel like there is a prejudice against you among Introverts?

Partly, but I may just have in mind people who have a problem with my being loud and very talkative as opposed to genuine Introverts. I'm not particularly concerned about what others think of me.

Would you say Introverts aggravate you a great deal?

By no means. My best friend is an Introvert, and I like and respect a great deal those aspects of him which are related to Introversion.

[white]

Individually bolded questions are like singly wrapped dark chocolates. Thoughtful.

Are there aspects of Extraverted behavior in others that really irritate you/put you off?

They feed off you, but then project their views from your inputs, vs really listen. Sometimes you feel robbed, like they've stolen your story and merely want you as an audience.

They're nice to everyone. What does that mean really. Who's special or not is hard to tell.

Are there qualities of Extraversion that you are critical of in yourself?

Too much dependence on external validation and affirmation. Not able to balance sometimes, a healthy sense of self with external expectations. I feel it keenly if I disappoint someone, even if the delivery of the word would've cost me too much.

Inability to say no - poor followthrough as a result.

Do you often feel like there is a prejudice against you among Introverts?

My own sister calls me a bimbo. What do you think.

Would you say Introverts aggravate you a great deal?

Only those with a holier-than-thou, I-spend-more-time-in-reflection-read-more-deep-things ergo I-am-way-superior-than-you attitude.

[Magic Poriferan]

Originally Posted by aelan

Individually bolded questions are like singly wrapped dark chocolates. Thoughtful.

Haha. Glad you like them, maddam.

Originally Posted by aelan

My own sister calls me a bimbo. What do you think?

I think that probably has more to do with sibling dynamics than Introversion to Extraversion.