How does an ENFJ feel after rejecting someone?

[á´…eparted]

Move on... You will come off desperate to the ENFJ.

This. Nothing good is going to come out of this for either of you. It will be a bunch of mixed signals and unfilfillment. Cut your losses.

 

[Vavazhan]

Thanks guys, I totally get your point. I'm sorry, I wasn't thinking straight, I am always very...optimistic and imaginative. I don't want to come off as desprate, it's just I'm not ready to lose him completely. I feel terrible because I feel like if I would just have shut up and never have asked him to define what we were, we would be on good terms right now, we were talking everyday. I ruined it, so I want to fix it. I guess I'll just wait for two or three weeks before contacting him and try to move on. I just want to make sure he's ok, and that he knows I'm ok and I don't 'hate' him...in case he still cares. He never ignores me, but if from his messages he seems like he doesn't feel like keeping in touch, I'll ghost him again (for good)

 

[Tilt]

Thanks guys, I totally get your point. I'm sorry, I wasn't thinking straight, I am always very...optimistic and imaginative. I don't want to come off as desprate, it's just I'm not ready to lose him completely. I feel terrible because I feel like if I would just have shut up and never have asked him to define what we were, we would be on good terms right now, we were talking everyday. I ruined it, so I want to fix it. I guess I'll just wait for two or three weeks before contacting him and try to move on. I just want to make sure he's ok, and that he knows I'm ok and I don't 'hate' him...in case he still cares. He never ignores me, but if from his messages he seems like he doesn't feel like keeping in touch, I'll ghost him again (for good)

Glad to hear that. As much as I value my ENFJ guy friend, he's notorious for stringing women along because he enjoys the attention, likes people to validate him, and cares about them all at once.

Just be careful of your own boundaries and emotions.

 

[Novella]

Just to give you some context to my earlier answer about you sitting back and allowing him to demonstrate his worth in the friendship. I am an INFP female as well and my best friend is a very charming and confident ENFJ. People often misinterpet her friendliness and willingness to help those in need as something more. She is naturally flirtatious with both genders. The difference being that she will put all of her focus into something she genuinely wants versus just being her beautiful self. People are flattered by her attention, she can make you feel like the only person in the room but this is her thing. She does it effortlessly. The difference is whether or not she shares anything vulnerable with you or not. She is great at sprouting, at the time, well intentioned plans at following up with a suggested 'some point in the future' social meeting. If she is interested however she is awesome at follow through. She will ensure that at a specific time and date, she will call or that social event will happen. For reference in a relationship, she has had two long term relationships and is still in her 2nd which has now lasted 13 years. She is not a frivolous or fickle person although at times I am sure she can be interpreted that way. Your time will come. From my experience the ENFJ means well but will only follow up with you if you resonate with them and their genuine interest has been 'invoked'. I don't think they feel guilt over being their charming selves. They will feel guilt however if you are one of their people and they feel they have let you down.